This. In the end, it doesn’t matter if its mandated. If its mandated and the company isn’t supportive, your wife will be miserable. She will be coached out of her new job or made to work non family friendly hours.
It’s great that its mandated, but its one of those be careful what you wish for things. If she is really unhappy in her current job, there isn’t any reason not to try something different. But if her current job is family supportive (not just pumping at work, but not minding sick kids and doctors appointments), that is worth putting up with other shit until the kids are in elementary school.
Do you also yell at out-of-shape joggers that they’re moving too slowly? Sneer at grocery customers whose carts are full of conventionally-grown produce?
Most American mothers have little choice but to work outside the home. Your wishes aside, this is unlikely to change any time soon. Daytime wetnursing services are similarly unlikely to become widely available. Therefore, periodic pumping is the only way that a working mother can acquire enough breastmilk to supply most of a baby’s nutritional needs.
Pumping is not fun, not fast, and not cheap. It necessitates periodic interruptions to the workday. Pumping mothers could certainly use a shot of encouragement, wouldn’t you say?
Well, no. Your advice to the pumping mother: “Don’t forget that expressed feeding is an inferior choice!”
Gee, thank you. I’m sure that all who read your words will be spurred to quit their job in order to stay home and breastfeed! Why did they need that nasty ol’ job anyway? It’s not as if they need money to live or anything!
I repeat: your proclamations do more ill than good. You contribute nothing more than another drop of guilt and another feeling of futility into an already-overflowing container. You invigorate none and discourage some from doing their level best with the cards they’ve been dealt. And for what? What awful, insufferable calamity will befall babies fed with reheated breast milk? Whatever you think it is, surely even you can’t possibly believe that it’s worth making many mothers feel like they might as well throw up their hands entirely with the whole breastfeeding thing.
You want change? Then work for it. Not sure what kind of proposals you have in mind to eliminate the need for dual-incomes in most working American families, but whatever you’ve got, shop it. Lobby for it. Send letters to congressmen. Raise funds for lobbbying. Set up distant-learning scholarships for nursing mothers.
Do something besides popping up on internet message boards to remind working mothers that they’re doing it wrong. Because trust me: they get enough of that noise already.
This is another warning for you. First, you’ve been told to knock off the subtle insults and snarky comments in general…second, for the mocking of another poster who isn’t in this thread.
Your posting privileges will be under discussion.
If someone’s got a cart full of conventionally grown produce and is talking about how they only buy organic, then yeah, I’m going to correct them. Fighting ignorance and all that.
I’m placed the judgment here on social policies that make these parenting choices so difficult, not on the parents who are forced to navigate them. I just want to be sure that as people weigh these choices, they are adequately informed about what they are trading off. It’s clear from your post that it’s not common knowledge that breastfeeding has benefits that feeding breast milk from a bottle does not. I do believe that attempting to educate people on a public forum is a legitimate (albeit small) way to contribute to social change. The fact that breastfeeding is impossible while working outside of the home is one of the many reasons why we need to provide more material support to parents.
You don’t seem to have any familiarity with the concept of paid family leave. As I said, it’s available in almost every country in the world, so it’s not some crazy, unprecedented scheme. Personally, I think we need at least six months of fully paid leave, and preferably one year. Delving further into this topic would require a thread in Great Debates, which I would love to participate in, if I had the time. This article provides some food for thought. (Check out the accompanying graphics.)
I spent the first year of my daughter’s life pumping several times per day in my car since I was working exclusively outreach and didn’t have an office. It can be done.