Picked up Issue 9 today, so here’s an update. I figured out what was going on in the Andrea timeline.
PAST TIMELINE (blue)
1.03 - Alfred walks in on Bruce and Selina having sex
1.06 - Batman has to tear himself away from Catwoman’s embrace to deal with Joker’s escape
1.09 - Catwoman runs into the Joker while stealing a diamond lion necklace from Jimmy the Lion
1.12 - The Joker asks if Catwoman knows who Batman is; he tells her “this isn’t who [she] is”
1.15 - Catwoman sneaks into Bruce’s bedroom
2.02 - Batman tells Catwoman about the Joker’s murder of Jimmy the Lion
2.06 - Selina forces her way into the Joker’s lair, where he listens to “Up on the Rooftop”; she throws Jimmy the Lion’s diamond lion necklace at him
2.09 - Catwoman comes across Batman trying to open Jimmy the Lion’s safe to find the diamond necklace
2.12 - Bruce and Selina have dinner, served by Alfred, while discussing Jimmy the Lion’s diamond necklace
2.15 - Batman asks Catwoman if she was with the Joker when he killed Jimmy the Lion; she says no
3.03 - Catwoman confronts the Joker about his “reindeer” and fights him
3.06 - Bruce notices Selina’s injuries and they have sex
3.09 - Catwoman breaks into a safe to steal jewels only to find the Joker huddled inside; he tells her of his plan to commit mass murder and dares her to warn Batman
4.01 - Innocents skate at the ice rink while a time bomb ticks underneath
4.06 - Batman finds the time bomb at the ice rink
4.09 - Batman demands that Catwoman tell him what she knows about the Joker’s plans; she tells him to fuck off and to beat the information out of her
5.02 - Selina is getting drunk at a bar and she tells the bartender that she is going to skip out without paying. He reaches for his shotgun, but she has already disarmed it. He swings the shotgun at her, but she hits him with the bottle. She staggers out with another bottle.
5.05 - Selina staggers through an alley, still drinking, and cursing Batman’s name
5.08 - Catwoman falls through a skylight an attempt to steal a dinosaur fossil. Batman appears and carries her away.
6.01 - Joker hangs out on Catwoman’s sofa as she chugs liquor to counter her hangover; Joker has an idea for decorating the Christmas tree that Batman sent to decorate her place
6.04 - Selina brings out all her cat-themed ornaments to decorate her tree
6.07 - Joker helps Selina decorate her Christmas tree. As she takes each ornament out of the box, she recalls the story of how she had stolen it
6.10 - Catwoman and Joker finish decorating the tree and Joker says it would have been funnier had Catwoman not told Batman about the bomb. Catwoman asks Joker if she is a good person. Joker leaves but there’s a knock on the door and it’s Bruce. He tells her that he is lost without her.
7.01 - Bruce and Selina make love
7.04 - Bruce and Selina bask in the afterglow in Selina’s living room. He says he knows that the Joker has been there
7.07 - Catwoman sees the Bat Signal from her window. Bruce says they can’t keep doing this. She tells him never to come back and that she knows where the Joker is but won’t tell him.
7.10 - Batman meets Commissioner Gordon at the scene of horrific murders committed by the Joker
8.03 - Catwoman slaps Batman and leads him on a chase, refusing to help him catch the Joker
8.04 - Batman and Catwoman follow the tracker that Batman injected into Joker’s leg, but it leads to a man standing on the rail of a bridge. The man falls from the bridge and Batman goes after him. Catwoman waits on the bridge. Batman recovers the body
8.06 - Batman and Catwoman argue on the bridge until she jumps
8.09 - Catwoman gets drunk while Joker puts on a Santa costume. She asks whether she is responsible for not stopping his crimes. Joker asks her where he can find Batman to wish him happy holidays, and then eat him
9.03 - Catwoman wonders whether Joker is kidding, but he isn’t. He describes his fantasy of brutally stabbing Batman to death. Joker begs her, as a good friend, for this Christmas gift and points a gun at her head.
9.06 - Batman practices with a punching bag held by Alfred. He wonders aloud why he can’t resist Catwoman; he wonders whether he is in love with her.
9.09 - Catwoman tries to ask Joker a serious question while he keeps telling Jokes; she smacks him around and then looks him in the eyes, concluding that “it’s all a fucking lie.”
9.11 - Catwoman confronts Joker, while he sings
ANDREA BEAUMONT TIMELINE (red)
1.02 - Andrea visits Bruce and asks for help in finding her son, Andrew; Bruce tells her Alfred is dead
1.05 - Batman tells Catwoman about Andrea’s visit and her son
1.08 - Catwoman takes Batman to see the Sewer King
1.11 - Catwoman chases down a kid who knew Andrew Beaumont
1.14 - Batman finds Andrew Beaumont’s body and asks Andrea about his father
1.16 - Andrea opens Victoria Beaumont’s crypt and finds the Mask of the Phantasm and sits in her hotel room, listening to “Silent Night”
2.04 - Andrea tells Scott Huff that his Angel of Death awaits
2.05 - Batman and Catwoman find Scott Huff’s body
2.08 - Warren Poland arrives at Porky’s as asks for a whiskey; he drinks to the Angel of Death and dies; Batman and Catwoman arrive on the scene
2.11 - Brian Patchett flees into the Subway but is found in a subway car by the Phantasm
2.14 - Bruce and Selina see the Bat Signal; they arrive at a cemetery where the Joker begs for protection from the Phantasm
3.02 - Joker sings “God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen” for the security camera while in custody
3.05 - The Phantasm kills Paul Fleishman; Batman goes to the Joker’s cell to interrogate him about it
3.08 - The Phantasm attacks Selina in Bruce’s bedroom while Batman meets with Matches Malone; they both lie unconscious on the pavement outside
4.02 - The Phantasm (Andrea) views images of her son living and dead on a wall of televisions while planning something for the Gotham World’s Fair
4.04 - Bruce and Seilna prepare for a gala party and she tells him about Joker’s time bomb under the ice rink; Bruce leaves her to deal with it; Selina goes down to the Batcave (in her underwear) and finds the Phantasm (Andrea) there, looking at the images of her son
4.07 - The Phantasm (Andrea) tells Selina that Batman is a failure
5.03 - Andrea releases Selina and they both suit up
5.06 - The Phantasm takes Selina to interrogate Sal Neismann, who was a procurer of victims for the Joker. Catwoman doesn’t stop the Phantasm from killing Sal.
5.09 - Catwoman and the Phantasm talk over a glass of wine while a robotic cook wields a knife nearby
6.02 - The Phantasm holds Catwoman hostage and waits for Batman to return; she offers to release Catwoman if Batman lets her have the Joker
6.05 - Batman and the Phantasm fight over the Joker
6.08 - Batman and the Phantasm fight over the Joker until Catwoman surprises them, renders Batman unconscious and agrees to help the Phantasm kill the Joker.
7.02 - Bruce awakens in a bank vault to see a note from Catwoman saying that she and Andrea are going to kill the Joker
7.05 - Bruce, locked in the vault, prepares for the police to blow the door and start shooting
7.08 - Batman overcomes the strike team sent to respond to the break in at the bank and steals a uniform from one of them
7.11 - Catwoman tells Batman that instead of killing the Joker, the Phantasm disappeared with him
8.01 - Joker and the Phantasm show up at the home of John Covington
8.07 - Joker and the Phantasm terrorize the family
8.10 - Andrea takes off her mask and tells the little boy that his missing older brother was her son.
8.11 - Joker sneaks up behind Andrea while she speaks to the family and begins strangling Andrea while the family watches.
9.01 - Joker sings “Little Town of Bethlehem” while strangling Andrea, encouraging the family to sing along
9.04 - Joker is interrupted by a Batarang. Batman and Catwoman arrive; Catwoman begs Batman to allow her to kill Joker as a Christmas gift; Batman refuses. Joker threatens to kill Andrea.
9.07 - Joker explains that Andrea’s son was really this family’s elder son, whom Andrea kept as her own in secret; and accuses her of hypocrisy, having stolen a child from his family while punishing people she judged as having done wrong. Andrea dies of strangulation while Joker explains he has hidden a bomb.
9.10 - Batman tries to find the bomb among the presents under the tree, but it goes off.
9.12 - Catwoman confronts Joker, while he sings
FUTURE TIMELINE (white)
1.01 - Catwoman drives to Florida while listening to “Silent Night” on the radio
1.04 - Catwoman arrives at the Joker’s retirement home
1.07 - Selina and the Joker discuss grandchildren
1.10 - Selina tells the Joker she has news about Bruce
1.13 - Selina tells the Joker about Bruce’s death
1.17 - Selina hugs the Joker and tells him she will kill him
2.01 - The Joker asks Selina how she will kill him
2.03 - Selina says she will use her fingernail
2.07 - The Joker offers Selina a glass of water and he reminisces about the time she cut his throat at her wedding in the church; Selina asks for ice and the Joker opens the freezer, where he has kept a gun
2.10 - The Joker returns from the kitchen and fires his gun, but Selina is behind him
2.13 - Selina and the Joker fight while Selina talks about Andrea
2.16 - Selina kills the Joker
3.01 - Batwoman (Helena) and Commissioner Dick Grayson discuss what he suspects is the Joker’s murder
3.04 - Helena tells Selina about the investigation and Selina responds with a story about her life
3.07 - Helena, on patrol, calls Selina to tell her that the body was confirmed to be the Joker’s and that Dick is taking over the investigation
3.10 - Helena, having dinner with Selina, tells her she found no clues at the Joker’s apartment
4.03 - Batwoman (Helena) interrupts a caper by the Penguin to talk to him about Seiina
4.05 - Batwoman (Helena) confronts a series of aged Batman adversaries to question them about the old days (Tweedledum and Tweedledee, Scarface, Killer Croc, Clayface, Nora Fries)
4.08 - Selina confronts Penguin and asks him what he told Helena; her cat kills his penguin
5.01 - Selina is relaxing at home when she hears a crash outside. She looks out the window to see that Harley Quinn has crashed into a snowbank. She emerges vowing revenge for Joker’s murder
5.04 - Selina and Harley Quinn fight. Harley is upset that she wasn’t the one who got to kill the Joker.
5.07 - Harley Quinn and Selina fight in the kitchen
5.10 - Helena comes upon Selina and an unconscious Harley Quinn, and demands to know what happened.
6.03 - Helena accuses Selina of murdering the Joker; Selina ignores the accusation and offers to join her on patrol that evening
6.06 - Selina and Helena, in costume, visit Commissioner Dick Grayson on the rooftop in response to his lighting the Bat Signal. Selina tells Dick that Bruce would have been proud of him
6.09 - Selina and Helena battle a series of villains whose identities are based on silly puns (the Dragoon, Four-Face, Polymath). Afterwards, Selina admits to Helena that she killed the Joker
7.03 - Commissioner Dick Grayson shows up at Wayne Manor with a strike team of S.W.A.T. and National Guard. Dick rings the doorbell and arrests her. Selina tells Dick the real story behind Robin’s original costume.
7.06 - Helena tells the Batman costume on display that she turned Selina in to Dick
7.09 - Selina is booked in at the jail
7.12 - Selina prepares to break out of jail
8.02 - Batwoman and Commissioner Dick Grayson talk about smoking, James Gordon, and why Bruce loved Selina
8.05 - A policeman finds Selina in the morgue, inspecting the Joker’s body
8.08 - Batwoman and Commissioner Dick Grayson find the Joker’s dismembered body parts decorating a large tree
9.02 - Oswald (Penguin), nearly naked and living in filth looks in a mirror, wondering how he reached this state. The chauffeur of a limousine picks him up and in the back seat waits Selina. He insulter her and she breaks his nose with a kick before asking for a favor
9.05 - Selina straightens Oswald’s nose and opens a bottle of champagne; she asks his help in fleeing Gotham; she says he owes her for her killing Joker.
9.08 - Selina and Oswald discuss the old days, while waiting for Oswald’s contact to arrive.
9.11 - Selina’s ride arrives, but it’s not Oswald’s contact; it’s Batwoman (Helena); Selina breaks Oswald’s nose again.
9.13 - Batwoman confronts Selina, while she sings.