Food Feast

Last thing in the kitchen

  1. Stale cereal
  2. Jar of pickles
  3. Old spices
  4. old ice cubes that smell funny
  5. A 1.5oz. jar of Cream of Tartar that still has 1.49 oz. in it after 35 years.
  6. Pickled lemons
  7. That container of unidentifiable stuff in the back of the fridge’s bottom shelf.
  8. unopened Ramen foil flavor packet
  9. the jar of homemade vegetable soup that the lady who owned the house before us left behind, with the date clearly handwritten a freakin’ 15 years earlier
  10. The tin can without the label that nobody can even remember what it is.

Next up: Purple foods

  1. Grapes

Next up: Purple foods

  1. Grapes
  2. Mission Figs

Purple foods

  1. Grapes
  2. Mission Figs
  3. Eggplant

Purple foods

  1. Grapes
  2. Mission Figs
  3. Eggplant
  4. Purple cabbage

Purple foods

  1. Grapes
  2. Mission Figs
  3. Eggplant
  4. Purple cabbage
  5. Elderberry

Purple foods

  1. Grapes
  2. Mission Figs
  3. Eggplant
  4. Purple cabbage
  5. Elderberry
  6. Plum

Purple foods

  1. Grapes
  2. Mission Figs
  3. Eggplant
  4. Purple cabbage
  5. Elderberry
  6. Plum
  7. Purple olives

Purple foods

  1. Grapes
  2. Mission Figs
  3. Eggplant
  4. Purple cabbage
  5. Elderberry
  6. Plum
  7. Purple olives
  8. Blueberries

As George Carlin pointed out, blue on the vine, purple on the plate.

Purple foods

  1. Grapes
  2. Mission Figs
  3. Eggplant
  4. Purple cabbage
  5. Elderberry
  6. Plum
  7. Purple olives
  8. Blueberries
  9. Grape drink

Also known in certain circles as “grape drank,” and is composed of just three ingredients, according to noted grape drink enthusiast Dave Chappelle: water, sugar, and purple.

Purple foods

  1. Grapes

  2. Mission Figs

  3. Eggplant

  4. Purple cabbage

  5. Elderberry

  6. Plum

  7. Purple olives

  8. Blueberries

  9. Grape drink

  10. Prunes
    Christmas Cookie Shapes

  11. Star

Christmas Cookie Shapes

  1. Star
  2. Christmas trees

Christmas Cookie Shapes

  1. Star
  2. Christmas trees
  3. Santa Claus

Christmas Cookie Shapes

  1. Star
  2. Christmas trees
  3. Santa Claus
  4. Angel

Christmas Cookie Shapes

  1. Star
  2. Christmas trees
  3. Santa Claus
  4. Angel
  5. Gingerbread men

Christmas Cookie Shapes

  1. Star
  2. Christmas trees
  3. Santa Claus
  4. Angel
  5. Gingerbread men
  6. Toy drum

Christmas Cookie Shapes

  1. Star
  2. Christmas trees
  3. Santa Claus
  4. Angel
  5. Gingerbread men
  6. Toy drum
  7. Snowman

Christmas Cookie Shapes

  1. Star
  2. Christmas trees
  3. Santa Claus
  4. Angel
  5. Gingerbread men
  6. Toy drum
  7. Snowman
  8. Stockings

Christmas Cookie Shapes

  1. Star
  2. Christmas trees
  3. Santa Claus
  4. Angel
  5. Gingerbread men
  6. Toy drum
  7. Snowman
  8. Stockings
  9. Round

We were pretty unimaginative when we baked Christmas cookies.

I literally LOL.

Christmas Cookie Shapes

  1. Star
  2. Christmas trees
  3. Santa Claus
  4. Angel
  5. Gingerbread men
  6. Toy drum
  7. Snowman
  8. Stockings
  9. Round
  10. Reindeer heads with red (sugar) noses

Next up: To hell with Christmas. Tomorrow’s my Birthday

Typical Birthday foods

  1. Cake