For parents whose kids are all the same sex

(I guess this could apply to parents who have just one child, and aren’t having any more kids.)

Let’s say you have a house full of boys.

Do you regret not having a daughter?

Vice versa if you have all girls.

Do you feel as if you haven’t had the fullness of the parenting experience because you didn’t have both a son and a daughter?

Does it bother you that you never had a son/daughter?

I ask because a friend of mine lost her first baby, a girl, in utero at 37 weeks (yes, 37!). She then proceeded to have 3 boys, and now they’re finished having kids. I’ve always wondered if she regrets never having a daughter at all (of course she wishes she’d never lost her first baby), or if she’s cool with having all sons.

I have one girl, planning to have probably 2 more in a few years. I can’t say for sure how I would feel but I don’t think it’d bug me if I ended up having 2 more girls. Maybe it would, though, because I really do want a little boy someday, but I don’t think it would devastate me or anything if I never had one.

Any thoughts?

I had three boys up until my baby girl came along 1 1/2 years ago. The boys were about 14, 10, and 2 when she was born.
When I was pregnant with my first, I wanted a girl, and thought he would be a girl right up until he was born. What a shock! Once I got used to the idea, though…I never wanted ANYthing but boys after that.
I would very happily have had 4 boys and would never have regretted not having a girl. In fact, if I’d had a dozen kids, I would’ve been happy to have all boys. I went into a two or three month period of shock when I found out I was having a girl this last time.
Now that I DO have her, of course, I can’t imagine how I got along without her.
It makes me sad/irritable that so often people imply that the only reason I had so many kids is because I wanted a girl…as if I would be dissatisfied if she had been another boy!

I agree with you bodypoet. I have 2 sons and an infant daughter and I always hear “Finally got your girl, huh?”

I usually just answer “I’m so happy to have another beautiful child.” But I guess most people don’t notice that I’m contradicting them.

I would have been totally excited to have 3 boys. I didn’t feel that I was missing a thing.

When baby #4 comes along, I’ll be equally thrilled if it’s a girl or boy.

My folks had neighbors who wanted a son so badly, they kept going - 7 daughter before the boy was born. That’s just nuts, to my mind.

I only have one daughter. I wanted another child, and I really didn’t care which sex. Hubby wanted another daughter because he seemed to think girls are less trouble than boys. As it happened, we weren’t able to have any more. But it wouldn’t have been an issue to me either way. I didn’t even want to know the sex before mine was born - part of the fun was being surprised!

Perfectly happy with my girl (well, MOST of the time…today she’s been quite the little pain.) I was positive I was having a girl when I was pregnant, and was not a bit surprised to be correct - and no, we didn’t peek - like FCM I preferred not to know. We briefly considered having a second child, but ultimately decided not to. After the decision was made, the hubby said. “Geez…I’m kinda glad we decided not to… what if it had been a boy? I dunno what to do with boys!”

(aside to FCM: if you want a real giggle, ask me what happened to my friend whose husband asked her to try “just one more time” for a boy.)

Oh, gosh - WV_Woman - my sympathies to your friend!

Yeah, LOW. It happened almost 10 years ago, though … and they have 3 healthy, beautiful sons so I guess they are as over it as they can possibly be.

I can’t imagine, though :frowning: Makes me tear up just thinking about what that must be like :frowning:


My folks had neighbors who wanted a son so badly, they kept going - 7 daughter before the boy was born. That’s just nuts, to my mind.

Acquaintance of mine has 10 children. Seven boys, 3 girls.

Kid #10 was born because their younger daughter BEGGED them “PLEASE try for a girl, don’t let me be alone in the house with 7 boys!” (their first daughter, the oldest, had already moved out).

So they said “ok, we will try ONE TIME and that’s it.” Bada bing, January 2001, congratuations, it’s a girl.

Nuts, IMHO!!! I’m all for going forth and being fruitful and all that good stuff but 10 kids? On purpose? WTF?

LOW - did it involve impromptu surgery with a rusty can opener??? :eek:

[total hijack]My mother in fact is the oldest of 9 kids (would have been 10 except the youngest was stillborn) and can recall playing with a family who had 20 :eek: kids. Though she may have just been pulling my leg on that one, or a bunch may have been adopted, or maybe it was even true. Considering the size of families people had for that gen in that area (the Martimes)

Why is it that (in my experience) certain geographical areas have proportionally larger families? Such as the martimes?[/total hijack]

I’m a dad with two daughters. No regrets at all.

My sister has 4 girls and had a set of twin girls that were born prematurely and died. She also miscarried twice, both girls. She wasn’t really trying for a boy, she just loved children, babies and being pregnant. I am one of 5. 4 girls and 1 boy (the oldest). And a co-worker of mine is in her 20’s, married to a man of similar age. He is one of 19, both genders.


Ye gads, no! What happened was this (long story):

This couple had two girls, ages 5 and 10. The husband wanted to try once more for a son, the wife wanted to get her tubes tied. So they made a deal - if he could impregnate her within 30 days, she would have the baby, if not, she was scheduling surgery.
28 days later, she’s in the doctor’s office complaining of stomach flu. Doctor says, “You’re not sick, you’re pregnant.” Wife says, “Oh, hell.”

Fast forward to eight weeks later - doctor says, “Hmm… I may just be picking up an echo, but I want to do an ultrasound.” Yes, there in the ultrasound, a second baby can be seen hiding behind baby number 1.

Fast forward another week later: Wife gets a phone call from doctor: “Can you come back in? There’s something weird about this ultrasound.”

In the doctor’s office, an exam is performed. Wife says, “If you tell me there are three babies, I am going to faint.” Doctor places his arms behind wife for support and says, “Go ahead, I’ll catch you.”

Fast forward seven months: Wife delivers three healthy, full-term… GIRLS! :eek:

Husband wisely stops requesting sons, and starts making plans to pay for five weddings.

My aunt Marie was pregnant with their seventh (and last) child, both genders, and someone asked Uncle Peter, “Do you want a boy or a girl?” His response was, “By this time, I don’t care if it’s a monkey.” :smiley:

My father was one of five boys and wanted only daughters because he said girls were less trouble than boys. Well, there are two of us, my sister and I–and boy, was he mistaken!

My parents are perfectly satisfied with both me and my sister. Actually, I don’t think they’re really missing out on anything because I’m such a tomboy :slight_smile:

3 sons, one stillborn at 36 weeks. Yes, I would have liked a daughter but I don’t think it’s any more pronounced because of losing babies. Maybe it would be harder if my first son had been a daughter but I don’t know. I’ve seen people take it harder when they haven’t had the sex they wanted than I have ever taken it. Mostly I’m glad to have living children.

I was disappointed when my last child was a boy but I was mostly overwhelmingly glad simply to have another child who lived. I’ve had several miscarriages and it stands to reason that some of those babies were female

That story about the triplets is scary though ;). Every once in a while I get to thinking about having another child and with my luck that would happen to me.

One of each, boy eldest.

I’m one of two girls, and I missed having a big brother. I don’t know a lot about boys maturing, so when my 13 year old (today’s his birthday) comes to me with grown up stuff, I nod wisely and check with my husband to make sure he’s normal. He is.

For instance, he told me he’s been having two impulses lately, one, to kiss girls, and two, to hit somebody.

Ivylad laughed when I told him, and said that’s normal. He wants to kiss a girl, and he can’t, so he gets frustrated and wants to hit somebody.

I didn’t know boys went through this when they were growing up.

Ivylad is the middle child with an older and younger sister, and older SIL has two girls and younger SIL has two boys. They’re so close with each other it’s like having four children.

I think having a healthy child is the important thing. Having kids over and over in the hopes of getting a particular gender to me is ridiculous.

I have 3 examples, 2 quit without a getting daughter and another that finally got a son.

  1. My aunt Shirley hoped to give my grandmother’s her first granddaughter after 7 grandsons. She delivered grandson #8. My mother a year later had granddaughter #1. Shirley went on to deliver grandsons #9, 11, 13, 14. She never had a daughter.

  2. When I was about 12, a family with 5 boys at the time moved in down the street. The 2 older boys were the same ages as me and my brother. We were also told of the sister that was stillborn about 5 years earlier. They had 4 more boys before quitting with 9 boys, no girls.

  3. The couple across the street from my current resident have 4 girls. Pregnancy #5 was hoped to bring a boy but an early ultrasound did not have the new they wanted to hear, it looks like a girl. Baby gifts were bought and given, all anticipating another girl. Surprise, surprise, the baby was a boy. Everyone is happy and they are not having anymore children.

I read this thing a while back about human eggs, and how they kind of “pick” which sperm is allowed to enter. I’ll try to find it.

Here’s what I’m wondering: if this is true, could it be that some women produce eggs that prefer boy sperm to girl sperm, or vice versa?

I’ve also wondered if some men produce higher amounts of boy/girl sperm.

There’s got to be a reason that some families go generations having kids that are all the same gender.

I have one son, not sure if I am done or not, but have fertility issues where I am likely not having any more. I will always feel a little wistful that I don’t have a daughter, because I had 3 younger sisters that I mothered growing up. I know how and I am good at it. But I wanted a boy first, so no regrets, and wouldn’t be upset if #2 did end up a boy - probably be more fun for my son.
I must say, though, that it makes a heterosexual relationship a bit easier when you both grew up with the oppostie sex sibling. Most of my boyfriends prior to my husband were only children, or only had brothers. I was so shocked the first time I took pantyhose off in front of my husband and he offered to scratch my legs for me! I didn’t tell him they are itchy, he knew from his sister… little things like that are nice. :slight_smile:

As far as heredity determining the sex, it is a fact that X chromosone sperm produce girls) are slower and heavier, yet hardier than Y (male producing) sperm. The sperm must travel through the cervical mucus to get to the egg. The mucus changes with hormones, and must be the exact right pH to get pregnant. I wonder if people who always have one gender or the other either have really good conditions so the boys always get there first, or barely hospitable conditions so only the girls survive to get there.