For the love of your country, fill out your census form!

Goddammit to hell, what the fuck is wrong with people who think that filling out the census is leading us down the primrose path to a socialistic, totalitarian Obamanazi regime, complete with black helicopters and concentration camps for Whitey? I live in West Texas, and to listen to people talking about the apparently onerous and odious task of filling out a 10-minute form asking basic demographic questions would make one think it’s just as egregious an affront to their sense of propriety as someone asking to pork their 12-year-old daughter. It’s fucking mind-blowing.

Case in point. My girlfriend’s redneck father has been railing about the census form (the fucking SHORT FORM) he received, calling it an invasion of privacy to ask what race he is, his income, and how many people stay at his house on a regular basis. He’s a Tea Partier, and even has the “Don’t Tread on Me” flag proudly displayed in his home. He takes notes (no shit!) on Glenn Beck. He’s a birther. And he is voluntarily unemployed, so he has plenty of time to stew in the fetid Right Wing juices served up hot and fresh from Fox News.

I wish I had the balls to tell him if he really wants to be fucking patriotic, he’d fill out the goddamn form and send it back (it’s in The Constitution, after all) We’ve been doing censuses in this country for generations, and world-wide since at least the time of the Roman empire. I’ve told my girlfriend to appeal to his religion (he’s nominally Christian). According to his holy book, Jesus’ parents registered with the Roman census when he was a child. If it’s good enough for Jesus, it’s got to be good enough for dimwit like him, right?

These Tea-Partying, bible-beating, strict-construction numbskulls even have the audacity to complain about how much taxpayer money this whole affair is costing. Do they not realize that most of the cost (I think, but don’t know for sure) comes from the logistical nightmare of getting a populous from the ostensible “Greatest Country in the World” to fill out a simple form? You want to stick it to old Uncle Sam, do you? Well, mail the form back and no one from the Obama-SS will come by and harass you. If you can manage to not smear feces on it, that is. That will require a followup visit.

To me, filling out the census is a patriotic duty, the law be damned. As a statistician, I understand the importance of data in directing policy that affects everyone, even the lame-brains who on the lookout for Black Helicopters.

Under-reporting in the red states means proportionally more power in Congress for the blue. Give your girlfriend’s father a big, sloppy “thank you” kiss from this California liberal. He’s making it easier for us to pass our socialist agenda.

I wrote in “HUMAN”. That may or may not be an applicable model to the present case, however.

Whoa there. It was supposed to be a SECRET agenda :smiley:

Uh-oh. There was an income question? I don’t remember seeing that, and it’s already sealed up and ready for the mail.

Seriously, fast food surveys ask me more invasive questions, and I’ll do that for a free burger. This is basic civic duty on par with jury duty, and it’s vastly less onerous.

West Texas liberal here (there are a few of us!). Talk about a silver lining. Never thought of it that way!:smiley:

Oh, Og no! PLEASE don’t make me do follow-up to the feces crowd! Noooooooo!

I already had an encounter with these mouth-breathers last May while working for the Census. This sort of talk is not making me feel warm and fuzzy.

Grr. I already filled out a very long census form. And got a follow up phone call to clarify a question (so I know they got it). Yesterday, I got ANOTHER census envelope in the mail. I haven’t opened it yet, but if I have to fill it out again, I’m going to be annoyed.

That could be the funniest thing I’ve read in months. Scary, but very funny.

Hm. News to me anybody thinks that. The only RW ranting I’ve heard about the Census in the past year is based on the meme that ACORN will run it and the inner-city populations will be inflated.

How many goddamn times do we have to explain it to you, statsman1982? THE. PRESIDENT. IS. BLACK! Do I have to draw you a picture or something?
Of course a guy named statsman1982 defends the census…

Was the OP’s GF’s father like this during the last census, or did he just forget that he’s filled them out without complaint before?

Maybe I indulged in some slight (very slight) hyperbole.

I will amend my original post to excuse reluctance (not outright refusal, though) of one group: Holocaust survivors. I don’t know if this is a myth or what, but I have heard that some survivors have been mistrustful of censuses, since presumably that is how the Nazis knew who had Jewish ancestry. My grandmother was a survivor–escaped off of a train to Auschwitz, she did–born of a Catholic father and Jewish mother. But I don’t know if her family was captured based on the census.

See Marley23’s post above.

It’s that time where statisticians honor the first uses of our profession. It’s where we shine. It’s our Superbowl. And, like Pon Farr, it’s where we can kick up our sandals that cover our Argyle-sock-clad feet and make new statisticians!

Okay. Only some of that is true.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, ten whole minutes? Where are people supposed to find that kind of time between the hours spent goofing off at work, and wanking to internet porn?

There’s porn on the internet?

It took me well under 10 minutes, but I was a bit thrown by the fact that they entreated me to send it in “today,” giving information about how many people were staying at my address on April 1st, 2010.

Quite apart from any temporal anomalies involved, who decided that the best day to collect accurate data about should be April fools day?

The first form was probably the American Community Survey. This replaces the long form that was randomly sent out in 2000. The one you got yesterday is probably the same questionnaire that everyone is getting. It’s just ten questions and shouldn’t take longer than a commercial break to fill out.

My favorite story is the dipshit who saw my badge while we were in line at Rite Aid. He insisted that the Census is unconstitutional. :rolleyes: I’ve got more, but I can’t share them.

If it makes the OP’s girlfriend’s father feel better (which it won’t), the questions being asked this time are no different than the questions asked in previous Censuses. I have a copy of an actual enumerator’s report from 1920 that asked these same questions.

He’d probably think that’s as legitimate as Obama’s “birth certificate”. :rolleyes: