From the "Get a fucking clue department".

The BBQ Pit
1

This news flash is just in from the home office:

It gets dark here really early.

The roads are slippery.

My van is rather large and heavy.

You are a pedestrian.

You should not wear dark clothes.

Even though black is indeed slimming it’s not really visible at night.

You should not run across the middle of a dark street from between parked cars without looking.

You should not have been running and talking on your cel phone at the same time.

You should thank your god I have anti-lock brakes and good reflexes.

Your eyes can get really big when you think you are about to be run down.

I hope your cel phone broke into a thousand pieces when it hit the pavement.

Yelling at me almost got you the beating of your fucking life.

Whoever and wherever you are… you’re are one lucky dumbfuck to be alive.

Thank you.

2

:wink: that’d be cell phone, aka cellular phone.

Understandable, what a dolt. People do the stupidist shit sometimes.

3

Well, duh Feynn. Black is so slimming! It slims enough to render the wearer invisible!! What more could you ask for?? All those womens mags over the years have been spot-on.

Life: The Price you Pay for Fashion…:stuck_out_tongue:

4

:wink: That’d be stupidest, the superlative degree of the adjective stupid.

5

I have just been wondering if someone has been running a special on stupid pills here lately.

This bozo wasn’t the first pedestrian this week that didn’t seem to paying attention.

There were also the two guys on bikes wearing dark clothing with no reflective equipment crossing against the light…

Maybe they think the full moon is providing enough illumination?

6

Well, here the stupidity is not limited to pedestrians, but has spread to the drivers.

Yesterday I was walking from the parking garage to the library for class around 4 PM. Yes, it was moving toward dark, but I was wearing a light colored sweatshirt, fairly light colored jeans, and I have a reflector strip on my backpack. I reach the crosswalk I want to use to cross Stadium ave, stop, look around, see that no one’s coming and begin to cross.

Stupid bitch in the blue neon reaches stop sign, rolls through it and begins to turn. About halfway through her turn she realizes I’m in the interesection, taps her breaks, pulls into the empty oncoming lane and honks at me as she passes me.

What the fuck was she thinking? This is a campus with lots of students on foot, thanks bitch. I learned to be careful when driving through here, because there are a lot of students who don’t look. But don’t honk like it’s my fucking fault that you’re not paying attention to what’s going on.

7

Hehehe.

The OP reminds me of the episode of the X-Files where the dumbass gets his wish granted to be invisible.

First thing he does is run around outside and get promptly run over by a truck.