Fuck the royals, fuck sports, fuck entertainment gossip. Fuck it all.

I have no idea why I’m so cantankerous this morning. Oh, wait, I know why. Because Google News splashed some prince this-and-that and princess whatsherface on my morning news read. Evidently they’re coming to New York, and there are some critical mass of people who give a shit. I don’t. Fuck them. I could have used those brain cells to retain something slightly more important to me, like maybe the image of a booger I picked in third grade.

And fuck sports. I don’t give a flying fuck if it’s the moist important game of the season. I don’t give a crap about a professional athlete’s opinions any more than I give a shit about how the curator of the world’s largest My Little Pony lunchbox collection feels about sand.

And gossip? Oh, screw it. I so don’t give a fuck about who is doing what to who that I can’t think of an example.

I’ve tried customizing Google news to avoid all this shit (and a lot of other things I don’t give a fuck about), but these three keep creeping in here or there. Or there they are in the front pages of the WaPost or the Times. I love Al-Jezeera America for it’s low-level of bullshit, but a recent redesign is screwing the pooch on that (film at eleven, because who is screwing who is ‘news’).

Anyway, these are just some of the things I don’t give a fuck about. Much of what I do give two shits about is probably high on your list of useless shit that would annoy you if it showed up in your news.

So, other than not giving a fuck about what Rhythmdvl doesn’t give a fuck about, what don’t you give a fuck about?

I don’t give a fuck about the inane rantings of those who seem unable to figure out how their scroll wheel works.

…or people who don’t know how to customize the news feed to their home page.

You missed a chance to call it an inane ranting about inanities.

But nonetheless, that was pretty much the last line in the OP. Is that all you don’t give a fuck about?

Which doesn’t help if I’m not logged in, and doesn’t help if I want any news source other than Google News, and doesn’t help when Google news decides that the Olympics or the Royals are just so fucking important that even though I have several things in my ‘never’ category, it’s going to put them in there anyway.

And no shit you can scroll past the blurb. But the only way to ignore the rest of the story is if the headline sinks in first.

I don’t get it. My home page is the google search engine box sometimes with a google doodle. I’ve never known it was even possible to personalize it with a news feed (or anything else), and now I’m worried that some day I might accidentally do it.

Have you tried calling the internet help line yet?

Google News is a huge step up from non-curated news sources. It’s far from perfect, but go to news.google.com, log in to a Google account, then click “personalize” at the top right. One thing they finally got right a year or two ago was allowing customizable news sources. I had Fox News, BrietBart, WND, ESPN, etc. showing up in the ‘regular’ feed. You can now adjust sliders for those down to ‘rarely’. It’s also helpful for sites you don’t mind per se but don’t want your news from (e.g. I don’t like CNN links because of the heavy digital content).

Above the ‘adjust sources’ sliders are the “Personalize Google News” sliders. You can move those up and down to prioritize things in terms of how they’re displayed, and you can downgrade or upgrade them to frequency of interest. You can add keywords too, and adjust the frequncey of how much you want them to appear. For their premade categories you can click a trash can that theoretically prevents related stores from showing up. So for example, I have Entertainment and Sports as deleted, but Grateful Dead and a few festivals that show up whenever there’s a news story on them.

I can’t quite figure out how to permanently delete a category. I can add “British Royal Family” to my list, then downgrade it to ‘rarely’, but that resulted in stories occasionally showing up (more than when not logged in). I tried clicking its delete button, but that just put it at the same level as all the other ‘top’ stories, so when there is a baby or a wedding or a new hat or whatever people who give a shit about royal things give a shit about in enough numbers, there it is on my news page.

Better than that. I just got off the phone with the the cyberpolice, and they’re going to backtrace those responsible for improper tagging and categorizing of stories !

  1. What anyone says on twitter. I don’t consider reading tweets to be legitimate news or entertainment. If I cared what people say on twitter, I’d subscribe to twitter (or whatever you have to do to read tweets). I don’t. Can we please leave tweets in the twittersphere?

  2. Who is dancing with which stars. And, all “news” hyping of entertainment shows. If someone cares about the season finale of Lost, or the last round of America’s Top new Singer, they’re probably already watching the show on a weekly basis. Leave the rest of us out of it for fuck’s sake.

  3. Soccer. (but that’s just me, I understand why it’s covered by the media)

  4. Christmas. Seriously. Imagine a year or two where we just didn’t bother.

Somebody needs to sprinkle a little more sugar on their corn flakes this morning… Just saying.

I’m with the OP, but the way I see it is I’m sick of hearing from people obsessed with stupid shit like Sports/Royals/Celebrities - yeah the shit I care about is pointless too but at least I don’t shove it down your throat

Now I’m even MORE confused. I say I’m worried that I might accidentally create a news feed on my home page (and the inference I intended for people to draw is that I don’t want one), and your response is to tell me how I can get one there on PURPOSE?

I must be horrible at communicating my ideas.

Heh! You said moist. Some people do get moist from watching an important game.

If I took the time to mention the things I didn’t give a fuck about, then I couldn’t exactly claim I didn’t give a fuck about them, could I?

Not followng.

Is the OP upset that members of the British Royal family are coming to NYC, or members of the Kansas City Royals?

Somebody is really horny today.

Maybe the OP has a point, I wonder why David Beckham is displayed on the packaging for the underwear I buy.

What’s your home page set to? This isn’t google.com itself, it’s news.google.com. Kind of like maps.google.com or gmail.google.com, etc. A separate page. It’s not my home page, just a bookmark to it that I use to see what’s going on in the world.

Splooshlympics?

So what are the top four things that you don’t want to hear about (number five being reserved for not wanting to hear about things I don’t want to hear about)?

The British Royal family bought the Kansas City Royals and are changing the staidum policy to serve a Royal with Cheese.

Because balls.

Would you rather see Prince Charles?

For some reason, I have Lorde stuck in my head now.

Better get her out and don’t let her back until she’s at least 18.