Fuck you, FlyLady!

The BBQ Pit
61

[QUOTE=Quiddity Glomfuster]
I think the point is that people who are depressed or have low self-esteem tend to not take care of themselves and part of that is letting their appearance slide. The idea is to get you up and dressed and tidy so that you’ll feel better about yourself.

Again, if you’re not in need of advice that helps you feel less gloomy, skip it. But there are lots and lots of women (the membership’s up to 300,000) who clearly find it very helpful.

Another rationale behind the shoe thing, I gather, is so you’re ready for emergencies like having to drive to school and pick up a sick kid (or walk through the broken glass if you’ve had an earthquake) but I just ignore it. I do, however, have shoes nearby in case The Big One smacks us.

Yes, she’s a little preachy, but if you read her own story, she’s a reformed slob and like all reformed anybodies, she’s a little fervent about the methods that pulled her out of her slump.
[/QUOTE]

I actually thought it was to prevent sitting or lying down and putting your feet up. 'Cause it’s too much effort to take 'em off and put 'em back on, so you have second thoughts. Wouldn’t work for me, though, I have no qualms about putting my sneakers on my couch. :smiley:

62

[QUOTE=Zsofia]
And actually I’ve been beating the FlyLady at her own game - now I’m two rooms reasonably clean, and I think by now I’m supposed to be lacing up my shoes, shining my sink, and loving myself. (Note to self - new vibrator time!)

I have got to admit, however, I do kinda like looking at the sink. I mean, I didn’t Windex it (are you crazy?) and I DEFINITELY didn’t use car polish (I mean REALLY crazy?) but I did scrub it. And last night after I poured a bunch of half-wine bottles out, I did in fact wipe it out again and felt pretty good about that.
[/QUOTE]
FlyLady is not a quick fix. Your house did not become a shithole overnight, it became a shithole over time, because of your bad habits. Fixing your habits doesn’t happen because you decided to clean up two rooms, and it doesn’t happen by clicking a link and reading a tip.

Changing your habits is hard work, and often takes a lot of itty bitty steps to get the habits ingrained into your life, rather than being a special duty you have to remember every day.

63

[QUOTE=Zsofia]
I’m going to try a two pronged approach - SHE for long term, FlyLady for cleaning up now. And actually I’ve been beating the FlyLady at her own game -

[/QUOTE]

I’ll admit, the point of this thread is now completely lost on me.

You hate her, but you’re choosing to follow her advice, and it’s working.

Is this one of those reverse psychology thingies?

64

I realize that this is not the purpose of the Pit, but this thread has made me feel better.

I’m not the only one who puts off cleaning in favor of taking a 2 hour “break” on the couch watching trash TV with a bag of chips, then feeling like crap afterward since I didn’t get anything done, and gosh, it’s too late to start now. (This cycle then repeats)

WhyNot, you have made me feel better and a bit more motivated, and for that I thank you. Based on the responses you’ve had, we’re not alone. Not that that helps us get our space cleaned up.

There are some ideas over in MPSIMS I might give a test drive. So, thanks to you, too, Zsofia.

65

[QUOTE=tlsapp76]
No dental floss? Oh, my laws! Don’t you know you’re supposed to ream out the crud that gets up against the metal rim of the sink? And what about the bases of your faucet and handles?

::faints from the horror::
[/QUOTE]

The thought of doing that makes me feel faint. I’d rather clean the toilet with my toothbrush, than unearth the unidentifiable gunk that grows in the sink. That’s the only kitchen chore that I require my husband to do.

I signed up for The Clean Home Journal. It’s sponsored by SC Johnson products, so they push their products in the “cleaning tips” section. But you get freebies and coupons.

66

[QUOTE=jsgoddess]
I’ll admit, the point of this thread is now completely lost on me.

You hate her, but you’re choosing to follow her advice, and it’s working.

Is this one of those reverse psychology thingies?
[/QUOTE]

Oh, come on. We all know I’m furious not just because the FlyLady is evil, which is true, but mostly because I really resent having to do this, but not as much as I resent living in a shithole. It’s cathartic to scream at the FlyLady, but we all know I’m really mad at me.

67

[QUOTE=Zsofia]
Oh, come on. We all know I’m furious not just because the FlyLady is evil, which is true, but mostly because I really resent having to do this, but not as much as I resent living in a shithole. It’s cathartic to scream at the FlyLady, but we all know I’m really mad at me.
[/QUOTE]

Okay. That isn’t how the OP read to me, honestly, but I am always willing to believe I misread something.

68

The windex and car polish is to make it really shiny. I have to admit her method of cleaning my sink made it look really pretty. Didn’t stick with it but for awhile it was really pretty.

Shoes tied on keep you moving, so what about Saturday or whenever your day off from work is. do you get up and jump into cleaning or drag it out? Days when I have gotten dressed with my shoes on I got more done in less time and earlier than when I don’t.

Try reading her site instead of getting the emails cause I find them really annoying. I liked the lists some other person on her site gives of extra’s to clean. It was things I hadn’t thought of.

[QUOTE=Zsofia]
Just a reminder - the shoes aren’t for cleaning. The shoes are for living. Wearing shoes to clean your house is one thing. Wearing shoes because you otherwise might crawl back into bed, or assuming I don’t ever wear shoes because I’m a woman is quite another.

Today I put on my shoes, just like the FlyLady said! Then I put on my nametag and went to work, like I do every day. Thanks, FlyLady, for the help. Without you I might have stepped on a nail or something!

I, uh, got a card box last night. I’m going to try a two pronged approach - SHE for long term, FlyLady for cleaning up now. And actually I’ve been beating the FlyLady at her own game - now I’m two rooms reasonably clean, and I think by now I’m supposed to be lacing up my shoes, shining my sink, and loving myself. (Note to self - new vibrator time!)

I have got to admit, however, I do kinda like looking at the sink. I mean, I didn’t Windex it (are you crazy?) and I DEFINITELY didn’t use car polish (I mean REALLY crazy?) but I did scrub it. And last night after I poured a bunch of half-wine bottles out, I did in fact wipe it out again and felt pretty good about that.

Seriously low blow, however - yesterday was trash pickup day, and somebody stole my empty trash can and left me their full one! Asshole behavior any day, but when I’m trying to clean?! I’mna call the city and see if there’s any numbers or something on those things, and then when I get home I’mna see if it’s got any mail in it. Because if it does, I’m so diming the po po.
[/QUOTE]

69

[QUOTE=Zsofia]
last night after I poured a bunch of half-wine bottles out, I did in fact wipe it out again and felt pretty good about that.
[/QUOTE]

Why would you have to wipe the sink again after doing that? You did pour the half wine bottles out into your mouth like you’re supposed to, right? :wink:

70

[QUOTE=Anne Neville]
Why would you have to wipe the sink again after doing that? You did pour the half wine bottles out into your mouth like you’re supposed to, right? :wink:
[/QUOTE]

Because they’d been sitting on the table for six months. I opened a new one in celebration.

I’m pretty proud of myself - bogged down on the cleaning yesterday but did manage to cook a meal and clean up after it, including the couscous pot which I always forget and leave on the stove for a few days. I remembered it as I was getting into bed and actually got up and went into the kitchen to rinse it out and stick it in the dishwasher. I seriously feel that if I can stick with it for a few weeks I might actually acquire at least a few new habits.

The new kitten thing may force me to keep it clean, though. Nothing is left standing on the coffee table anymore.

71

Just some advice: don’t try to change too many habits at once. Recipe for failure.

I can’t stand FlyLady either and have no problem with denigrating her while using her tips. It’s her delivery that is poisonous, not her actual info.

72

Is there enough interest for a SDMB Clean Up Your Shit support group? The monthly Weight Loss Club threads seem very successful and useful, and honestly, I hate my little fat rolls but I hate whatever that smell is more.

73

To tell the truth, I have always wondered about what having a cat would do to one’s housekeeping. Don’t you have to either put everything away, where they can’t get at it, or resign yourself to it being destroyed? As a knitter, this question has bothered me perhaps more than it does most people.

74

[QUOTE=Sattua]
To tell the truth, I have always wondered about what having a cat would do to one’s housekeeping. Don’t you have to either put everything away, where they can’t get at it, or resign yourself to it being destroyed? As a knitter, this question has bothered me perhaps more than it does most people.
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I cross stitch, and it does make me put my stuff up. Which is probably a good thing. Dewey doesn’t destroy stuff, but the new guy is a kitten and has some learning to do.

75

I do a lot of yelling at the cats, and sometimes manage to put stuff away. I sew, bead, and spin, so I’ve got a lot of crap. I am also absolutely allergic to putting anything away just after I’ve used it. The process maddens me. Don’t know why.

The support group sounds good, Zsofia. Show of hands? I certainly need support in cleaning the damn fridge and putting shit away.

76

[QUOTE=Zsofia]
I seriously feel that if I can stick with it for a few weeks I might actually acquire at least a few new habits.

[/QUOTE]

I’ve heard it takes two years for habits to become actual habits - but you can make them more habit like. And I think it does get easier.

My mother - a font of cleaning wisdom we have nicknamed “The White Tornado” was not much of a housekeeper when I was little - there weren’t dirty dishes, but the house was not at the state of clean she keeps it now with no kids at home. (I think Intel could lease her house to make chips). She said her biggest challenge was learning to spend 15 minutes picking up each night. 15 minutes before bed is worth half an hour the next day.

She became a cleaner in response to my Dad, who can get a little OCD with other people’s junk - he throws it away (his junk, don’t touch it - your junk on his countertop - don’t expect it to stay there).

77

[QUOTE=Zsofia]
Is there enough interest for a SDMB Clean Up Your Shit support group? The monthly Weight Loss Club threads seem very successful and useful, and honestly, I hate my little fat rolls but I hate whatever that smell is more.
[/QUOTE]

I’d join that. Threads on housecleaning or the lack thereof always seem to inspire me to spend more time on it–for a little while!

78

Okay, I’ll start it. I guess the best thing is to do like they do on the weight loss one and do a thread per month. Here it is:

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=8161599#post8161599

79

[QUOTE=adhemar]
The windex and car polish is to make it really shiny.
[/QUOTE]

She recommends using car polish to shine your sink? Are you kidding me? The sink isn’t to look at, it’s to use! Useful things don’t have to be that freakin’ shiny!

My sister used to use Flylady after her first child was born. I don’t know if she still does or not, but she certainly has kicked the slob habit she had when we shared a room. I need to follow her example, but I won’t be using Flylady to do it. I’m using the “clean one room/section of the house a week” method and it seems to be going well. When I remember. :o

80

[QUOTE=Sattua]
To tell the truth, I have always wondered about what having a cat would do to one’s housekeeping. Don’t you have to either put everything away, where they can’t get at it, or resign yourself to it being destroyed?
[/QUOTE]

Depends on what your clutter is. If it’s breakable stuff, yes, you would have to put it where they can’t get at it. If it’s yarn or thread, you would have to put it away, because cats can die from eating string-like objects. But if it’s books and papers, like the clutter in our apartment, they generally don’t destroy those and can’t easily hurt themselves with them, so it doesn’t matter.

It also depends on the cats- they’re all different. Kittens are more likely than adult cats to destroy things, but some adult cats are more likely to get into stuff than others.