Unfortunately after moving for the fourth time in as many years, this time I got careless with throwing away garbage, and some of it did contain old checks I hadn’t shredded. My fault for that. Definitely won’t ever do that again. And they could have stolen mail, it’s very possible. This is the first time in years I haven’t had a private mailbox, ours is out in the open. I’ve told my sister and her fiance to be careful and watch their accounts, thanks for the suggestion.
I might rent a P.O. box after the possibility of having mail stolen. I hope you get it all straightened out, and no checks bounce. I’m echoing the suggestion to go to the Police about this, someone in your town stole trash or mail to get your information. Maybe others have already reported mail theft as well, and you’ll help add to their research to find the person and stop them.
Yeah, I plan on going down and doing that today. Maybe it’s a good thing I live in a small town.
The visual is priceless:
"Knave…! Cease thine evil ways, lest Mjolnir strike thee down at yon Hemorrhoidal Root…! "
Okay kiddo, wicked sorry and all, but since you’ve gotten a good amount of actual advice I’ll ask the important question.
Sparking phallus?
I’ve had my identity stolen twice – both times someone got a hold of my debit card information, and I had to change my account. They had charged a bunch of crap to different phone companies that I had never used in my life.
Both times I got charged overdraft fees by the DAY until this was resolved – the first time, the bank corrected the overdraft fees automatically. The 2nd time, I had to go in and bitch about having been charged $400 or whatever the hell it was for overdrawing my account.
Both times, I was completely broke because of these assholes for an extended period of time. I’m sure i.d. theft must seem like a victimless crime when you don’t have to look the person in the eye you’re stealing from, but Jesus Christ, don’t they ever stop to think we might be real people, maybe even struggling financially ourselves? It makes me so angry I don’t want to think about it, because then I’ll just get angry all over again.
ETA: ‘‘sparkling phallus’’ is the reason I opened this thread.
“There’s a sucker born every minute”
It’s one of two reasons I opened it too, just curious.
Small town! Winooski has business parks – more than one! Y’all are the big city. 
I hope everything is straightened out soon. I’m with you on the panic.
Have you “rounded up the usual suspects”? How about everyone who assisted in or knew about your move - moving company, utilitiy company employees, or naighbors who might have been able to see/take your mail/address from the delivery point??
Ha! I just got this.
Since someone has yet to come up with it, I shall.
Thor’s Sparking Phallus – Band name!
This is the third time I’ve come into this thread for Thor’s sparking phallus and Thor’s sparking phallus alone.
To the OP, I know you’re feeling afraid right now, but I just wanted to add what little comfort there may be in knowing that most banks and credit card companies understand the concept of identity theft and will probably not punish you for the crimes of others. In my case, both times my bank was very understanding and I just had to fill out some forms. It was inconvenient and scary in the meantime, but eventually I got all my money back.
Well, you know. From the mighty hammer of Thor must come sparks.
What can I say, I come up with really weird stuff when I’m upset.
I’m glad you enjoy the colorful language.
Yeah, the first day was freak-out day.
My friends and myself helped keep me occupied and I kept myself busy taking care of things. Generally as long as I’m not left to sit and worry, I’m okay.
Scary, though. And damned inconvenient.
I don’t know if Opal is still maintaining her Page O’ Flames, but if she is then Thor’s sparking phallus belongs in the collection.
I just wanted to say that I just now saw that it was Thor’s Sparking Phallus, not Thor’s Sparkling Phallus. This changes EVERYTHING!!!
Well, he does polish it every day…
I’m sure it sparkles, too