Hee
I love this one
It seems to me as though it’s transliterated and then each word is replaced with the last entry in a thesaurus from another century. (“Prythee” for “please,” “pate” for “head,” “pillroller” for physician, and “sith” for “since”, meaning “until,” etc.)
“Please do not play with this toy carelessly or roughly,” if you were really wondering. 
If I had a scanner
I’d scanner in the morning
I’d scanner in the evening
All over this land…
Sorry…