You’re right, I can’t believe I forgot to mention these two scenes. I couldn’t even breathe when Michael Caine took that running swing at Steve Martin’s legs!
And when “Ruprecht” peed on himself (or pretended to, of course) at the table, I almost died laughing.
I know it’s been mentioned already, but I gotta say it anyway: Peter Sellers as Hurundi Bakshi in The Party. So much of that movie has me on the floor… the dinner scene is probably the funniest in the entire movie!
**The Naked Gun ** has been mentioned a few times, but not my favorite funny scene. The entire baseball game had me on the floor. From the singing of the National Anthem, to the Jumbotron highlights, to the crazy rundown (“I’ve never seen this before, but it looks like the *umpires * have Johnston (or whoever) in a rundown!”), to “I. Must. Kill. The. Queen.” and of course “Look! It’s Enrico Palazzo!”
Better off Dead, when John Cusack’s character is walking back to his car after the school dance, and out in the fog he sees the newspaper boy on his bike. The whole scene where he runs through the woods and leaps over the car- newspaper boy in hot pursuit- only to stop, frantically pat himself down, and scream “KEEEEYYYSS!!!” sends me into fits.
Mrs White trying to express her rage: “I hated her so much. There were flames… flames, on the side of my face… breathing… breathless… heaving breath… flames!”
Mr Green: “Mrs Peacock was a man!?!”
Mrs. Peacock: “Everything all right?”
Col. Mustard: “Yep, two corpses, everything’s fine.”
Anything Yvette says: “I voz liss-on-ing!” “I voz frightened, for I also drink ze cognac!”
Mrs White: “Well, he was always a rather stupidly optimistic man. I’m afraid it came a a great shock to him when he died.”
Wadsworth: “And to make a long story short -”
Everyone: “TOO LATE!”
“I / Am / Your singing telegram!” <gunshot>
And the line a few of my gay friends and I like to say as we leave the room: “I’m going home to sleep with my wife!”
I’m cracking up right now. I’ve gotta watch that movie again.
Life of Brian: Many people miss it, but for humour and irony and comment on human nature I just can’t go past the scene where Brian is reluctantly preaching to his followers from his window, trying desperately to persuade them not to be followers.
He yells out “You are all individuals” and the whole crowd repeats back to him in unison “Yes, we are all individuals” and then to top it off (and many people miss it) one lone guy says quietly “I’m not”.
Top Secret - Cedric has been smashed into a cube of scrap metal and comes waddling into the hotel room. He starts coughing, so Hillary administers an oil change of Hawaiian Punch.
Big Lebowski - The scene when he’s driving and drops the roach, freaks out and starts squealing, and the car plows into a dumpster. Something about that scene puts me into hysterics.
South Park - Bigger, Longer and Uncut - the whole “How would you like to suck my balls?” scene is great. I love Stan’s “Holy sh*t, dude” at the end.
Team America, World Police - the “Dicks f*ck assholes” speech at the end. Beautiful.
History of the World, Part I - so many parts of it, but I love the little piece where there’s the big banner saying “1st Annual Orgy - First Served, First Come”. I think that’s the same scene with Hugh Hefner saying to someone “It’s a totally new concept, it’s called a ‘Centrefold’”.
I considered the entire movie **The Full Monty **a buildup to the last 5 minutes. Mostly the scene where the camera’s behind the dancers and they tear their pants off simultaneously with a massive RIP and you see the flash of their butt cheeks. Had me laughing for a solid hour.
The scene in **Big Trouble in Little China **where Kurt Russel catches the dagger Lo Pan threw at him and instantly throws it back right into the middle of his forehead. This was after him being such a klutz throughout the movie as his friend Wang did all the fighting.
The scene in **Ruthless People **where Danny DeVito is palling it up with a cop who’s watching his house, when the phone rings. DeVito picks up the phone, says hello, and says “Mary? Who’s this? Sheila? Hey Sheila, Mary can’t come to the phone right now. My dick is in her mouth. She’ll call you back later.” Then he says to the cop, “I love getting wrong numbers.”
Garden State, the scene where Natalie Portman tugged on her ear and later, where she raised her hand. Doesn’t sound like much, but in context, pure comedy gold.
Kingpin, when he is pretending to be Amish. He is trying to be ultra-helpful, and one morning they are heading somewhere.
One says: Where is he? Sleeping late?
And he comes running up and says “I thought I’d wake up early and milk the cow. It was really hard to get her started but once she did, wow!” He’s got milk on his upper lip, making it evident he’s been drinking from the bucket.
And they all stare at him, and one says “We don’t have a cow. We have a bull.”
