But it was the stewardess, Randi, who actually did the playing and singing.
Is it Billy?
“Have you ever been in a Turkish prison, Billy?”
“And I’m wearing a cardboard belt!”
And Spinal Tap with the tiny Stonehenge!
It’s a scene at the end of the Ryan O’Neal-Barbra Streisand film “What’s Up Doc?”. Filmed shortly after the phenomenally successful “Love Story”, with Ryan O’Neal as the love interest, that spawned the unforgiveably schmaltzy “Love means never having to say you’re sorry”, “Doc” takes a shot at it by having Barbra’s character utter the line and O’Neal’s character riposts “That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.”
I still laugh out loud every time I see it.
Joey.
Hudson Hawk
“Bonnie! Ball ball!”
“I think Bonnie found my ball ball!”
Oscar
Basically every scene with Marisa Tomei or Tim Curry was classic.
Tomei: I’m not a little girl anymore! Look!
Stallone: Put that away! Guh…I"M YOUR FATHER
Curry [eyeing a stack of ladies’ underwear]: Oh yes and this is money. Really, this is quite impressive Mr. Provolone. (Paraphrasing since I can’t find the dialogue on the web)
The Freshman
Larry London: Carmine said one boy, here are two!
Larry London: Carmine said one boy, here are two!!
Larry London: [sings in German] Mein Herz schwebt in Blut! That means ‘My Heart Swims In Blood’.
Clark Kellogg: Yeah.
Victor Ray: [hands Clark a fake passport] Is that a piece of work or what?
Clark Kellogg: What is this? “Rodolfo Lasparri”?
Victor Ray: Clark, I gotta tell you. The odds are pretty good we’re all gonna be on a plane to Palermo, Sicily tonight, at midnight, if we’re still walking.
Clark Kellogg: I don’t want to go to Palermo, Sicily!
Victor Ray: Have you ever been there?
Clark Kellogg: No, of course not!
Victor Ray: Then you really can’t make an informed judgement, can you, Rodolfo?
More Airplane…
McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit smoking.
McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking.
McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines
McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.
ELAINE
You got a telegram from headquarters
today.
STRIKER
Headquarters!? What is it?
ELAINE
It's a big building where the generals
meet. But that's not important right now.
DR. RUMACK
You'd better tell the Captain. We've got
to land as soon as we can. This woman has
to be gotten to a hospital.
ELAINE
A hospital? What is it?
DR. RUMACK
It's a big building with patients. But
that's not important right now.
RANDY
Excuse me, sir. There's been a little
problem in the cockpit and I was
wondering...
STRIKER
The cockpit? What is it?
RANDY
It's the little room at the front of the
plane where the pilots sit. But that's not
important right now.
Cleese was a Latin tutor while at Cambridge so that scene was him in teaching mode 
Ok, punch out the stewardess. And while you’re at it, punch out the production executive who thought up that inane gag.
Hot Shots: Part Deux, Charlie Sheens’ fight-finishing move (walnuts!).
The Big Lebowski, the absolutely dead-pan delivery of “Obviously you’re not a golfer.” cracks me up every time.
The credits, among many other moments, in Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
It’s interesting. I’m not familiar with many of these movies, so for me they’re quotes out of context…and as it turns out quoting them out of context is often not very funny. As they say, “guess you had to be there.”
Airplane -
“TAKE YOUR CRASH POSITIONS!”
“I take my coffee black. Like my men”
A fish called Wanda -
“No, Otto, Apes do read philosophy, they just don’t understand it”
Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid -
“Use enough dynamite there Butch?”
Blazing Saddles -
“Somebody go back and get a shit load of dimes!”
This is the first movie I thought of. My favorites, guaranteed to make me laugh every viewing:
Otto: Oh, you English are so superior, aren’t you? Well, would you like to know what you’d be without us, the good ol’ U.S. of A. to protect you? I’ll tell you. The smallest fucking province in the Russian Empire, that’s what! So don’t call me stupid, lady. Just thank me.
Wendy: Well, thank you for popping in and protecting us.
Otto: If it wasn’t for us, you’d all be speaking German! Singing “Deutschland, Deutschland über alles…”
and
Wanda: Oh, right! To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people! I’ve known sheep that could outwit you. I’ve worn dresses with higher IQs. But you think you’re an intellectual, don’t you, ape?
Otto: Apes don’t read philosophy.
Wanda: Yes they do, Otto. They just don’t understand it. Now let me correct you on a couple of things, OK? Aristotle was not Belgian. The central message of Buddhism is not “Every man for himself.” And the London Underground is not a political movement. Those are all mistakes, Otto. I looked them up.
Although I hesitate to use this clip. the prior 30 seconds has the band in full-tilt boogie rock and roll, and then this happens:
The fact that it is loud as hell, but he can hear her crying…and then mis-hears her name. Breaks me up every time. This has probably made me laugh a hundred times, at least.In Top Secret!, the hero is introduced to members of the French Resistance:
Du Quois: This is Chevalier, Montage, Detente, Avant Garde, and Deja Vu.
Deja Vu: Haven’t we met before, monsieur?
Nick: I don’t think so.
Du Quois: Over there, Croissant, Souffle, Escargot, and Chocolate Mousse.
And this exchange:
Hillary: Nick? What does that mean?
Nick: Oh, nothing. My dad thought of it while he was shaving.
When Kramer hears about this the shit will really hit the fan.
Battle Pope writes:
> . . . Cleese was a Latin tutor while at Cambridge . . .
Actually, he spent the two years between graduating from high school and entering Cambridge teaching at the high school he graduated from. One of the things he taught was Latin. He wasn’t a tutor for Latin or anything else at Cambridge. He studied law there and spent his spare time writing comedy sketches for and acting in shows put on by Cambridge students.
ahh* mea culpa*, I was going by my memory of the commentary track on the DVD.
The entire Opera in “The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes’ Smarter Brother”
“You surprised to see us, Clark?”
“Surprised, Eddie? If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet, I wouldn’t be more surprised than I am now.”