As of this post I have 12 posts in this thread and you have 4. I’m starting to wonder about myself. :dubious:
It may be beyond the boundary of this thread, but there seems to me, for whatever reason, to be a lot more of this - for lack of a better word - “adultification” of pursuits and pastimes that used, once upon a time, to be the exclusive realm of children.
I think it was on another bulletin board, but I read some poster quite seriously complaining that his enjoyment of his favorite superhero comic characters was “quite spoiled” by all of the children who appeared to be attracted to superhero comics …
I also think there needs to be certain distinctions between what a fan is and does.
I consider myself quite the geek. I am a fan of many things. Mostly of the science fiction genre. I love to watch the movies and I might have an odd model or toy of something here and there (Say, the Delorean from Back to the Future). I might get into silly debates on the motives of characters, or the cannon and mythology surrounding the franchise. I might even play a themed board game (like, Lord of the Rings Risk). That’s typical fan behavior to me.
I think it becomes something else when a fan starts to identify with a character in such a way that they role play, fantasize and even convene for the sole purpose to live out that fantasy for a while and blurring the line of reality. They pretend they are in that universe. Wholly different from just being entertained by it, admiring its aesthetics and leaving it at that, IMO. And, of course, I don’t have a problem with any of that, but when I say I’m a fan of Star Wars, no one asks me what my Darth name is, what color is my lightsaber, and where do I get my Sith cloak dry cleaned.
A lot of people talk about “not wanting to grow up” as if it’s a bad thing. I’m not convinced it is, especially for people who choose not to have children of their own. Take me, for example. I’m in my early 40s, happily married, happily childfree. I love World of Warcraft, roleplaying games in general, cats (not in a furry sense–I have five cats) and Harry Potter (though I’m not in any way part of the HP fandom). I own a lot of items that most people would consider “not grown up,” and I do a lot of “not grown up” things. Frankly, I consider being “grown up” (in the stereotypical sense of the word) to be boring. Standing around at parties drinking wine and making small talk is boring. Office jobs are boring (I have one–I like it and like my coworkers, but it’s essentially boring). A lot of things about so-called adult life are boring. I’d rather hang with the geeks and talk about gaming, or Star Trek/Star Wars, or Harry Potter, or whatever. While doing this I still manage to maintain adult responsibilities: I pay all my bills on time, own a home (with the bank, of course), manage the things I need to manage.
Sometimes it bothers me that “adults” look down on those of us who choose to have a little unconventional fun. Just because we’re not watching and getting wound up about the local sports team, attending wine-and-cheese soirees, or on the fast track to CEO, doesn’t mean we’re not enjoying life.
No offense whatsoever intended to anyone–it’s definitely a “your mileage may vary” thing. But me, I’d rather be a little less of an “adult” and have a little more fun. To get back to the OP, if some people like to do this by fantasizing about being furry animals or dressing up as catgirls, more power to them.
winterhawk11: agreed.
I’ll grow up straight away. I’ll stop sitting in front of my computer playing superhero games with my friends and instead sit in front of the TV watching football by myself. 
Well, I’m all for renaissance festivals or what’s it called, creative anachronism? I’m all for paint-ball tournaments. I’m all for grown-ups playing pretend. When it becomes a full-time lifestyle choice, I’m still all for it. Like I said earlier, “be it harm none.”
The reason I came into the thread is to question the idea that I should accept others’ lifestyles because I’m secretly one of them. That’s not the way to make me accept your lifestyle choice. Make me accept your lifestyle choice by being nice, and I’ll jump in and have fun. No hands or paws, though. Respect my boundaries. 
What’s wrong with living out the fantasy for awhile?
For me, it’s no more than an extension of my LARPing. I used to play Vampire and Werewolf, and I still would except there aren’t any groups that I am aware of where I now live. When I hang out in IRC I’m my feline fursona. Just like when I write on some of the role play boards I’m a half elf, or a dragon, or a wizard.
Blurring the line of reality is fine, it’s when you blur it so much that you can’t live a reasonably healthy life it’s gone too far IMO. I pushed that envelope when I was in my teens, came out the other side of it and have a little perspective now. Enough that I do feel connection to some of the furry world, but enough that it’s not what I revolve around.
Which is why I consider myself a fan and role player and not much more.
Do you think that your desire to be child-free is a byproduct of wanting to have so many hobbies? I mean, kids take up a lot of time and energy, and my experience has been that some of my personal interests have taken a back seat to the things I need to do now that I’m a parent. You know that you have your adult responsibilities to take care of, so do you think not having children a way of limiting those responsibilites so you still have time for games & stuff?
Well, of course. And I’m not trying to imply that enjoying a good game of D&D every now and again is a bad thing.
Well, as has been pointed out, there is a range of involvement in furry-dom. I think that it’s a little strange to consider children’s cartoons ones’ favorite genre of films, but that seems quirky at most. Actually having an animal alter-ego seems more like a desire to avoid relating to actual people as people. That’s something that doesn’t sound exactly healthy to me, although certainly I’m not going to condemn anyone for it.
I think that for those of us who have children, there is a difference: a child experiences stuff in ways that are different from an adult, because to them, often it is the very first time they are experiencing it. Their impressions of stuff designed for kids are not shadowed with experience to the same degree or overlaid with adult concerns.
For me, I get pleasure from the delight my two and a half year old experiences watching Thomas the Tank Engine and playing with Thomas train toys, but I cannot myself replicate that same delight - I doubt any adult could. There is however a large contingent of adult Thomas fans. They clearly get enjoyment out of these things; but it seems to me that it would be in ways different from those of a real child - not inferior necessarily, but different.
The suspicion (and I admit it may be totally unfair) is that their enjoyment is based on such stuff as excessive nostalgia for childhood, rather than a real recreation of the guileless enjoyment of children, which may not be a really good thing. Of course, it is none of anyone’s business.
I think I’m beginning to get a little bloody from beating my head against this wall, but I’ll try again.
Nobody’s trying to make you a part of their group. The point we’ve been trying to get across, which you’ve shown little sign of acknowledging, is that the group isn’t as weird and freaky as you seem to think. All I said was a lot of furry stuff is accepted as mainstream, yet the fandom is made out to be this weird perverse bunch. They’re just getting unfairly tarred by the actions of the minority.
Well, I threw you a bone. You didn’t take it.
I was trying to avoid this analogy but here goes: don’t tell a straight guy he should accept homosexuality because there are lots of hot guys on TV and he’s “a little bit gay.” That’s how you get beat up and have laws passed against you.
Well, of course there’s nothing wrong with it. It’s just something else, or beyond being a mere fan.* Role-Player is a fine general label. Furry being a subset of a Role Player.
Also, what’s a LARP?
*And yes, I know the word fan has its roots in the word fanatic, but I’m sticking with current recognized expressions of geek lingo.
For me personally, no. I’ve known since I was a very small child that I had no interest in having children of my own. Even when I was young I found hanging around with babies and small children tiresome. I readily admit to being a fairly self-absorbed person who is quite capable of being happy with my own company (though I love my spouse dearly and love spending time with him). Even if I’d been a completely conventional adult, I wouldn’t have been a parent. I think if anything my interests are the byproduct of having a very active imagination that requires constant outlets, and “adult” pursuits don’t generally give me what I want (nor do what I personally would consider completely childish pursuits, like watching things like Barney or Dora the Explorer). I bore more easily than most people I know, but I’m also capable, if I know I’m going to be doing something boring for awhile, of withdrawing inside my own head and entertaining myself with my imagination.
Sadly, many adult-type pursuits don’t seem to place a high value on imagination. Again, YMMV.
I think at this point we’re talking past each other. The way I’m seeing it, it’s like being straight, watching, I dunno, Will & Grace or Brokeback Mountain or something (I know someone will nitpick my choices, I’m just grabbing at what I have available in my head) and enjoying it, then acting like homosexuals are weird fetishists. (This isn’t a perfect analogy by any means, so I’ll leave it here.) The point is, you may not be part of the group, but if you can watch stuff that group likes, then maybe they’re not such weird ‘fetishists’ after all. You can find something appealing in the same material, they just find it that much more appealing.
I suspect there won’t be anything else productive we can get out of this line of discussion, though.
Live Action Role Play/ing. It’s like one of those murder-mystery dinners where everybody is given a character to act out, and all the characters are given a scenario/storyline to work within. There’s often a goal (i.e. figure out who the murderer is). Except the characters and scenarios can be whatever the person designing the LARP wants them to be. Vampires, werewolves, characters from a book or movie, beuraucrats on vacation…
Live Action Role Play. If you’re familiar with SCA, they’re a pretty popular LARP group. Instead of sitting at a table or typing out text online, people get dressed up and act stuff out together for their own benefit.
Can you give any examples of mainstream Furry media? My suspicion, is that, those that consider themselves “Furries”, might see Robin Hood or Monsters Inc., and think, oh… now this has been created by and for Furries. Which I believe is hardly the case.
LARP is live action role play… the people who instead of sitting around the table rolling dice, go out and act out their characters. They wear costumes, and pretend they are someone else. Fights are determined by stats and rock paper scissors instead of stats and dice.
So I used to get dressed up and pretend I was a vampire. I still have pictures of some of the people (some made very elaborate costumes… this was set in dark ages also).
So, LARP stands for… Live-Action… what now?