Should be
Second Witch: Paddock calls.
Third witch: Anon.
All: Fair is foul, etc.
“Two households, both alike in dignity,
In fair Verona, where we lay our scene,
From ancient grudge break to new mutiny,
Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.
From forth the fatal loins of these two foes
A pair of starening-cross’d lovers take their life;
Whole misadventured piteous overthrows
Do with their death bury their parents’ strife.
The fearful passage of their death-mark’d love,
And the continuance of their parents’ rage,
Which, but their children’s end, nought could remove…”
rewritten as
Boys and girls from Rome to Milan/take it from two suicidal teens/parents just don’t understand.
“As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from uneasy dreams, he found himself transformed into a giant insect.”
rewritten as
One night Greg got hold of some bad X.
“Whether I shall turn out to be the hero of my own life, or whether that station will be held by anybody else, these pages must show. To begin my life with the beginning of my life, I record that I was born (as I have been informed and believe) on a Friday, at twelve o’clock at night. It was remarked that the clock began to strike, and I began to cry, simultaneously.”
rewritten as
Mama said I was born at night.
sternvogel, I’ve checked my Penguin Modern Classics version of Macbeth and the text corresponds with what I posted.
Mind you, it only cost £1 so they may have made economies. 
My college roommates and I created Hatchet Classics and, on tape, performed “Moby Dick”. The script went something like this:
“Call me Ismael.”
“Look out for the whale”
(Sound of water poured into the sink)
“It et the captain!”
Everyone: “Awwwwww.”
The end
::yawn:: I wonder what I should to toda----HOLY SHIT!! I’m a friggin’ COCKROACH!!!
A friend just e-mailed me the link to this site. Quite entertaining I do think, and along the same lines of this little game.
Summerizing quite a few chapters and several hundred pages that makes up the beginning of Les Miserables.
There is a Bishop. He is Good. There is a man named Valjean. He used to be good, went to prison for shoplifting and became bad. He steals from a Bishop and a kid and becomes Good again. He then becomes a Rich man and a Mayor.
Or, the plot of almost every HP Lovecraft Story:
I am scared and most likely insane because I saw something very strange. Now I will tell you what led up to it. (Insert lots of atmosphere building, little character development, some plot, lots of adjectives,maybe a couple dead people and usally some kind of beastie). This final piece of evidence, denoted by italics, will prove everything, at least to me. (dies or goes insane).
A guy got stuck on a trail at night and couldn’t start a fire, so he just gave up and died.