The rogue detective pisses off the lieutenant one time too many so the superior demands his badge and gun. The suspended cop spends the next two weeks on a well-needed vacation where he gets an opportunity to rethink the methods that he’s been using to catch criminals and concludes that following a by-the-book approach may help him solve most crimes more efficiently as well as grant him a better career progression while he is on the force.
Hah, I have not seen that one.
A chemical company accidentally releases an unusual mutagen into the sewers. The EPA is quickly called and clean up efforts are carried out by the company with the EPA supervising the operation to ensure everyone’s safety. Unfortunately, four turtles and one rat were found dead by the toxic effects of the chemicals but the sewers and the city are otherwise deemed safe within acceptable limits.
I have more confidence agencies like the EPA and their ability to clean up toxins, since I saw the minimum wage employees of this bouncy house place my son likes, half of whom were probably still in high school, rally into formation, with buckets, mops and squeegees, and clean up, then disinfect, a bouncy castle that had been vomited in, in under four minutes. It took four employees, and they moved like one unit. If you told me they had been drilled in this, I’d believe it. I couldn’t believe how fast and efficient they were. From first wretch to folding up the “DO NOT ENTER” sign was less than five minutes. They evaced the castle like there was an Anthrax threat. It was a thing of beauty.
People who clean up toxic waste for the EPA are going to be ex-military, or have advanced degrees in science disciplines, and they are definitely going to go through drills before doing the real thing. Plus, they probably get paid more than minimum wage.
A man believes he has been contacted by outer space aliens and begins doing things like making giant mashed potato models of mountains in the kitchen with a glazed expression. He is of course taken to see a doctor, who gives him medications that help control the aberrant behavior and he goes on to live a long, happy productive life instead of believing he gets a ride on an alien spaceship.
Either that or he becomes a famous modern artist.
A spaceship crew answers a distress call on a remote colony. Their first venture outside the ship results in one crewmember being attacked, and the integrity of his spacesuit compromised. They try to bring him back to the ship for medical help, but the first officer reminds them that protocol requires that he cannot be brought in since they don’t have proper decontamination facilities on their ship. They realize this is the wiser course, and when an alien creature burst through his chest a short time later as he lies outside the ship, they all agree they did the smart thing, leave the planet, and nuke the very dangerous site from orbit, as it is the only way to make sure.
The joint chiefs of staff call in a brilliant but hot-headed and insubordinate major. They show him a model of a seemingly impregnable mountain fortress held by the Nazis.
They tell him, “Our best men tell us there’s absolutely no way to capture this citadel. What do you say?”
He studies it for a minute and says, “They’re right.”
They nod, “Yeah, that’s what we figured. Never mind. Dismissed.”
A young camp counselor tells her boyfriend to knock it off, and yells at the other kids to leave Jason alone. Everyone enjoys a nice day at the lake.
Psychotic Serial Killer Freddy Kruger is executed and is quickly forgotten.
Shortly before arriving Frodo is dumped overboard and the Eagle takes the Ring from his corpse. And so the Reign of the Black Eagle begins…
Construction droid #74-B3 installs a grate over exhaust port #K55 of the Death Star
Qui-Gon Jinn: Anakin, you have won the pod race and we have gained your freedom. I will take you back to Coruscant to learn the ways of the Force.
Anakin: Can my mom come too?
Qui-Gon Jinn: Sure.
It’s an aging detective’s last day on the force. The alarm clock goes off. He starts to get up.
His wife says, “Why not just call in sick. What’re they gonna do, FIRE you?”
“Good idea, honey,” he says. He rolls over and goes back to sleep."
The police commissioner and his men have the caped crime-fighter in custody:
“We don’t take kindly to vigilantes in the big city, my friend. And what the hell does, ‘I am the night’ mean, anyway? Take this clown to Bellevue for examination for as long as it takes.”
And they do.
A renowned child psychiatrist returns home to find a deranged, half-naked man in his bathroom, who turns out to be one of his former patients. Using his well-honed psychological skills, he manages to convince the deranged man into laying down his gun and giving up. Later, the psychiatrist decides to quit his practice and becomes vice-president of the Mickey Mouse Club.
Richard Reeds is a brilliant scientist researching high energy physics. He asks is wife, his best friend, and his wife’s brother to accompany him as he performs a ground breaking experiment. Something goes wrong,however, and the four are exposed to cosmic rays. Their cells begin to mutate. To change.
The four have developed Acute Myeloid Leukemia. Though his wife stands by him, the other two sue the fuck out of him because seriously, they weren’t trained for that shit. All four are dead before the lawsuit is decided.
The aliens don’t attack, they just observe earth for a short time, unbeknownst to humans, from a distance that keep themselves undetectable. Once they’ve determined we’re all idiots, they peacefully go on their way.
A woman at a roadhouse bar is clearly intoxicated. She’s flirting with everyone and generally acting like a jackass. The men at the roadhouse determine her address from her ID and send her home in a taxi. The woman wakes up the next day with nothing more than a nasty hangover.
A scientist on another planet predicts his homeworld’s destruction and prepares a rocket that will fit his son so he can launch the child to Earth where the lesser gravity and yellow sun will provide the child with amazing powers when he grows up. Unfortunately, the exploding planet alters the course of the moon and the rocket crashes right into it.