[GAME] Ruin random action/suspense movie plot

I just saw this movie (again), and I think it might be more like this:

The kid returns the doll she stole, and the blind woman says “Wait, what the fuck-- you had it all this time? do you know a woman got murdered over this?” and begins to beat the kid with the doll. Then the heroin falls out, and the blind woman calls the real police from the kid’s phone upstairs.

I was thinking more like this is what doesn’t happen in all those “War vet goes coo-coo and take Walmart hostage.”

No, I just meant that you posted it twice! :slight_smile:

Oh. I didn’t even notice! Must be the “cat on the keyboard” phenomenon, because the site won’t let you double post within a few seconds-- you know, if you have a hiccup, and hit a key twice.

Well, given that there’s way more than one “crazy vet with PTSD” movie, let’s say I have headed off two of them.

An incredibly handsome scientist is on the run from a group of government assassins who are determined to kill him and steal the secret formula he has developed.

As he runs down the street, pursued by the killers, he jumps into a random vehicle stopped at a traffic light. He looks over at the beautiful woman driving the car and blurts out that he needs help escaping from the assassins, and also needs a quiet place to hide for a couple of days until he can get the formula to the proper authorities.

The woman looks him over, tells him that she is staying at her moms and sleeping on the couch temporarily, and that she is already running late for work. She drops him off at the next corner, and drives on to her job at Walgreens.

The man exits the vehicle and is promptly shot by the killers.

A construction worker in the future visits a company that promises to implant memories of a vacation to Mars, allowing him to visit the planet without ever leaving home. After reading the extensive disclaimers, however, he thinks better of it and decides not to partake of their services. On the way home, he’s run over and killed by a JohnnyCab.

A road runner injures its leg on a rock while running along a road. A coyote catches it and eats it.

A duck gets shot in the face by a hunter (suffering from articulation disorder) and his beak comes off. However, he dies.

A coyote uses jet-propelled shoes to chase after a roadrunner. The shoes work perfectly and the coyote gets his dinner.

A hunter is stopped by a game warden and gets citations for 1) not displaying a valid hunting license and B) having a shotgun that holds more than 3 shells. The shotgun is confiscated and the hunter goes home.

Strangely while hunting I’ve never encountered crazy rabbits or insane ducks.

A highly trained, highly decorated, deadly ex-Green Beret has a low-level corporate position in a high-rise office building, where no one knows his background.

A team of 50 heavily armed terrorists comes in and takes over the building. Everyone else in the building is killed or taken hostage, but the ex-Green Beret manages to conceal himself.

He briefly considers using the stealth tactics he learned in the Army to take out the terrorists one by one… then decides, to sneak out of the building unseen and go home, instead. The company isn’t paying him nearly enough to put his neck on the line, and most of his co-workers are assholes anyway.

A man wearing a magic helmet and brandishing a metal spear is struck by lightning during a storm and is electrocuted.

That’s because it’s fiddler crab season.

A coyote thumbs through an Acme catalog and thinks up a scheme to catch a roadrunner unitizing bird seed, a rocket, 10 feet of rope, a grand piano, and a giant magnet. Pauses for a moment and then orders Dominos.

A retired badass gets a call-his former squadmate and best friend is being pressured by a local corrupt businessman to sell out the local watering hole to Big Business. The retired guy hops in a car and drives to the sleepy small town where the action is taking place. After talking to his friend, who suggests taking on the businessman, and helping to fight off some goons who show up, and doing some checking around, he discovers the truth: the old friend is waaay behind on his bills. He’s been cited for a LOT of safety, food, and booze violations. The goons? A local gang, the head of which has a sister who works at the bar and was assaulted by the hero’s friend. The corrupt businessman has offered a fair deal and even to let the old man run it as a manager at a generous salary. The hero goes to his pal, beats the crap out of him, tells him to solve his own problems, and leaves.

(ala Roadhouse)

The evil computer genius is about to type in the code on his laptop to take over the world! In moments, he will have complete access to all the world’s vdeo surveillance, to all the databases of the world’s banks, to all the missiles in the American and Russian arsenals, to all the knowledge of the Universe!

World domination will be his with just a few more keystrokes!

But then… his screen locks up. Cripes, lousy Windows 8! Okay, he’ll just reboot. Shoot, it’s taking FOREVER to reboot. Ugh. Finally, home page is up. Oh wait, he left the caps on, so his password wasn’t accepted, and now he’s locked out. Crud! Gotta call McAfee tech support to get the password reset. Dang it, I HATE Muzak! “Please hold, your call is very important to us.” He waits 20 minutes, has to pee, so he runs to the bathroom. When he gets back, he finds the tech guy answered, heard no one at the other end and hung up.

Well, he IS an evil genius. He somehow resets his own password, reboots, then… “Oh man, the WI-fi is down again? I gotta call Time Warner tech support… Ah, forget it. I never really wanted to rule the world anyway.”
(Speaking as a programmer, I wish ANYTHING at my office worked as well as everything works in ***Live Free or Die Hard ***and The Net.

Too bad it was rabbit hunting season. (Ain’t I a stinker) :wink:

A high-powered business executive learns of a secret corporate plan to place plutonium in the drinking water of a major city, thereby maximizing the market for his company’s cancer treatments.

Horrified, he immediately contacts the legal department who, in conjunction with the city police and the FBI, arrests the conspirators in a massive sting operation. The Board of Directors gives the executive a nice 6-figure bonus and a promotion, while the mayor gives him the key to the city.

The security guard at the entrance to a top-secret government laboratory suddenly receives an urgent message to lock down the gates, as one of the “bugs” has gotten loose. Dutifully he complies, locking down the facility before seeking shelter himself – but it’s too late, as he perishes minutes later along with everyone else in the lab. Eventuallly, the government sterilizes and bulldozes the entire site, and all remaining samples of the “supervirus” are destroyed.

Weeks later, a 106-year-old Nebraska woman dies quietly in her sleep, without a single person ever having dreamed about her.

The CEO and the board of directors of a multibillion dollar corporation listen eagerly to a new weapons proposal from one of their top scientists.

Professor Schwartz tells them, “We have concocted a virus that will reanimate the dead, creatiing an indestructible army! We could make billions, trillions of dollars.”

The CEO and board members look at each other, roll their eyes, and groan, “That is the sickest and stupidest idea we have ever heard. You’re fired. Clear out your desk, and seek mental help at once. Next…”