Devil or angel, I can’t make up my mind
Which one you are I’d like to wake up and find
Devil or angel dear, whichever you are
I miss you, I miss you, I mi-i-iss you
Devil or angel please say you’ll be mi-i-ine
Love me or leave me, I’ll go out of my mind
Devil or angel dear, whichever you are
I need you, I need you, I need you
We’re those two dreadful children; we’re always very bold.
We make a special point of never doing what we’re told.
We’re those two dreadful children; we search and we destroy.
We do a lot of damage for just one girl and boy.
We’re those two dreadful children; we delight in causing pain.
We once tied up the housemaid and we beat her again and again.
And, when she came 'round again, she made as if to shout
So we got a bunch of flowers and we stuffed them in her mouth.
We’re those two dreadful children; our parents can’t control us.
Between us we’re so dreadful no reform school will enroll us.
We’re those two dreadful children; so watch out for her and me.
We’ll put thumbtacks in your slippers; powdered glass into your tea.
Kids! What’s the matter with kids today?
It’s a world of acne, a world of germs.
It’s your brand new dog coming down with worms.
It’s the notes being played
By a cockroach parade,
It’s the real world after all.
It’s a world of ulcers, a world of cysts.
It’s the hole in the road that you never miss.
It’s the cheap underwear
Creeping up to your hair,
It’s the real world after all.
Look out your window
That grass ain’t green
It’s kinda yellow
See what I mean?
Look up your chimney
The sky ain’t blue
It’s kinda yellow
You know it’s true
Lipstick gleam, Hexachloraphine,
Cling-cling the ring, clang-clang, she sang.
It’s tragic magic. There are no coincidences.
But sometimes, the pattern is more obvious.
A cigarette that bears a lipstick’s traces
An airline ticket to romantic places
And still my heart has wings
These foolish things remind me of you
A tinkling piano in the next apartment
Those stumblin’ words that told you what my heart meant
A fairground’s painted swings
These foolish things remind me of you
You came, you saw, you conquered me
When you did that to me
I knew somehow this had to be
We said goodbye with a highball
Then I got as high as a steeple
But we were intelligent people, no tears, no fuss
Hooray, for us
So, thanks for the memory
Of sunburns at the shore, darling, how are you?
You might have been a headache, but you never were a bore
I’m awfully glad I met you, cheerio and toodle-oo
And thank you so much
Well look at you
Hands full of money you always wanted to have
Saying sweet life is a downright drag
Down to the very last seed in the bag
As if it’s never gonna end
And the scene is through
Summer slipped under in this neighborhood
I’d like to hold onto you if I could
But now I’m gonna have to let you go for good
My disenchanted friend
They say that character you play is rising fast
So you get drunk, make a half-second jump
And experience it as the past
But this is it, the closer you get
The deeper you go, the tighter the net looks to me
You see, she was gonna be an actress
And I was gonna learn to fly.
She took off to find the footlights,
And I took off for the sky.
And here, she’s acting happy,
Inside her handsome home.
And me, I’m flying in my taxi,
Taking tips, and getting stoned…
Now, John at the bar is a friend of mine.
He gets me my drinks for free.
And he’s quick witrh a joke, or to light up your smoke.
But there’s someplace that he’d rather be.
He said, “Bill, I believe this is killing me,”
As the smile went away from his face.
“For I’m sure that I could be a movie star,
If I could get out of this place.”
She boarded the boat and turned and blew me a kiss
And later on, when the squad car came ‘round
I ate a handful of peanuts and I told ‘em this
"I don’t remember much, except just keep your hands on the wheel’’
“Just drive,” she said, “Just drive,” she said
Out here on the ocean
Mmm
Motor boatin’
The mystery masked man was smart
And got himself a Tonto
'cause Tonto did the dirty work for free.
But Tonto he was smarter
And one day said, “Kemo Sabe,
Kiss my ass, I bought a boat,
I’m going out to sea.”
Sea of heartbreak, lost love, loneliness
Memories of your caress so divine
I wish you were mine again my dear on this sea of tears
Sea of heartbreak
Then he got a sailor’s dream,
Cruisin’ around on the salty sea.
Joinin’ up with a fisher crew,
Go out and get him a whale or two.
Here’s success unto the Victory,
And crew of noble fame,
And glory to the captain,
Bold Nelson was his name;
At the Battle of Trafalgar,
The Victory cleared the way,
But my love was slain with Nelson,
Upon that very day.
*And then in 1966, on March the 7th day
A bloody great explosion made Lord Nelson rock and sway
He crashed and Dan O’Connell cried in woeful misery
“There are twice as many pigeons now that will come and sit on me”
So, remember brave Lord Nelson, boys.
He had never known defeat.
And for his reward, they blew him up,
In the middle of O’Connell Street.
*
Explanation: This was a jokey song by Tommy Makem and the Clancy Brothers, about the old statue of Lord Nelson that used to stand in Dublin’s O’Connell Street, next to a statue of Irish patriot Daniel O’Connell. Nelson’s statue was blown up by the IRA in 1966.
We went strolling through the park
Goosing statues in the dark
If Sherman’s horse can take it why can’t you?
Buffalo Bill, alas alack,
We pinched his nose and scratched his back
If Buffalo Bill can take it why can’t you?
While strolling through the park one day
In the merry month of may
I was taken by surprise
By a pair of Russian spies …