George Lucas Sucks Sweaty Bantha Balls

And I’m getting senile in my old age, for not figuring out just how hard he sucks those balls before now. If you don’t know by now, come September, Lucas will be releasing a new box set of the original trilogy on DVD. It will have both the Shortbus Editions and the laser disc versions of the films. The laser disc versions will be as close to the original versions of the films that we’re likely to get, ufortunately, the quality won’t be all that good. Here’s the official explaination as to why.

This is bullshit. First of all, Lucas quit editing on film ages ago. It’s all done by computer (which last I heard was called the “Editdroid”). How ILM would have cleaned the film up and added the “enhancements” is pretty simple. First, you clean the film up, and then save that as a master file. Next, you use a copy of that master file, for your “enhancements.” Never touching the original master file, because you never know when you’re going have to completely rework something (like say, splicing douchebag in at the end of Jedi). Yeah, sure, they did create new negatives of the altered films, but somewhere in Skywalker ranch are discs (be they hard drives, flopticals, laser discs, or what have you) with the cleaned up master files on them! It would probably be easier to use those files than transcoding the laser discs, but because Lucas is so pissy about people not accepting what he says is his “original intentions for the film” (horseshit, George, you’ve changed your stories so many times on what your intentions for the saga were, that it’s pointless to believe you), he’s using the crappy copies in hopes that it’ll shut everyone up.

Hey, George, there’s a reason that people bitch about the Shortbus Editions. It’s because they suck! The added CGI in most cases is annoying, and Greedo shooting first totally eliminates much of the character development of Han Solo. I hope a rancor chews your nuts off.

They’re on tape drive.


Hey, we’re getting the original versions in widescreen. I ain’t complaining.

My list of Things To Do Once I Invent A Time Machine is now limited to two:

  1. Persaude Hitler that he should stay in art school.
  2. Shoot George Lucas seven times in the head in 1990.

But what if, after you accomplish No. 1, Hitler goes on to create a wildly popular series of paintings revolving around a character named Jar Jar Binks that, many years later, inspires Lucas to base his WHOLE SERIES around this character? Congratulations, you’ve screwed up Hollywood even worse!

Usually I’m against piracy, but I can easily justify an exception for folks who pirate the widescreen laserdisc editions of the original trilogy so they can burn 'em on DVD and play them on today’s players. All the cinematic goodness, none of the “special edition” craptitude.

Not that I know anyone who actually does this, of course… :slight_smile:

I was ready to crack and get the disco remix versions, so I’m glad I can just hold out until September. Well, maybe I’ll rent and see first.

Who am I kidding?

Can someone explain what this means

This confuses a non-tech savy guy who sees the terms “Widescreen” and “Anamorphic Widescreen” and always thought the terms were interchangable.

What frustrates me is the timing. When the tainted DVDs first came out and we were told that the films of my childhood would never see the DVD format, I figured “yeah, that’s what you’re telling us now, but there’s money to be made on the originals so I know that they will be released eventually”. However, I thought he’d make us wait a very long time before doing so. Because of this, I bought the tainted versions. I figured they’d at least serve the purpose of tiding me over in the meantime, and it would give my aging VHSs a rest.

But this release is way sooner than I expected. I could have waited for this. I’d be less frustrated if I could at least just buy the originals, but realizing that to get the originals I have to buy the tainted versions a second time!!! just aggravates me.

I’ve yet to buy Eps I, II, and III. Yeah, as a Star Wars fan I will get them eventually. But there’s no way I’m going to pay more then once for those films!!! I’ll buy when they’re available as a box set and not before.

Anamorphic Widescreen means the film is saved on the DVD in a format that resizes to fit your TV ratio. So if you have a 4:3 screen, it will show the highest resolution of the image itself but the black bars are not part of the image. If you have a 16:9 screen, it stretches to fit and you see the highest resolution it can be again. In the case of the super-widescreen size of Star Wars you still get black bars on a 16:9, but they are not part of the image, they’re what’s excess.

In regular “letterbox” widescreen, which is a rare thing to see in DVD these days, the image is a TV resolution 4:3 image with the movie forced in to fit, the black bars actually being a part of the image itself. That gives you a low resolution result.

Frankly, for those people whining to get original copies of the movies on DVD, I am not surprised this what they get. Lucas does not like these versions - suck it up. It’s one or the other, you don’t get some kind of idealised mix between the two versions.

The first thing you learn in film school is that you never ever ever mess with your original negative/file/tape. YOU ALWAYS MAKE A COPY AND FUTZ WITH THAT.

I can’t imagine that the techs at ILM would’ve allowed Lucas (or anyone) to mess with the original negatives. There’s just no reason for it. Sounds like a line used to either save money or get everyone to buy this 6 disc set so they can come out with a new set in five years and keep the money rolling in.

Oh yeah, bullshit metres are pinging across this land FilmGeek. It would not be ridiculous to suggest that Lucas’s cash flow may well depend on a product release every 3 years or so, and this is the marketing guff used to justify the sub par product in anticipation of the ‘oh look, we found some proper negatives!’ release.

So what you’re saying is that Lucas didn’t invent Jar Jar Binks, that JJB was just like floating around in the ether & if Lucas hadn’t discovered it, some other artist would have?
Cooool, man. passes the joint

If Star Wars fans are really unhappy with the upcoming release, I make the following challenge to them.

Don’t buy 'em. Vote with your wallets.

However, not a single one will listen, and buy the new editions and go on whining and bitching about their childhoods being raped. Most obnoxious fandom ever (except possibly Phish fans).

I certainly wouldn’t know anyone who ever did that either. Especially anyone who would be so forward as to give the pirated DVD’s to his sister for her wedding present…
thanks bro!