But if you use cash, you’ll interrupt the ever-important Visa Dance™!
You’re getting a Doper for Christmas? I don’t even know who to ask for!
It’s the gift that keeps on giving.
Of course, there might be some pesky 13th amendment issues that might arise, but once those minor hurdles are cleared, we’re good to go.
I’m not sure if its my wife’s culture or just my wife, but to her the only gift worth giving is cash. O *perhaps * a gift card. She has a younger sister with whom she is very close.
Birthdays or holidays? Send a check. Parents? send a check. When her son’s birthday rolls around, all her friends just put cash in a card. Subsequently, when their kids’ birthdays roll around, we put cash in a card.
I made the mistake the first few years of our marriage of searching around for an actual gift my wife might like. Days of thought and shoppjng for a special, personal gift. Without fail, she will return it for cash. At some point I asked what she wanted for (birthday/Christmas), and she just wants the cash. The frustrating thing is, we have joint accounts! There is no difference if I “give” her cash than if she goes to the ATM and makes a withdrawal! Sure, it’s easy on me. I no longer have to fret over what to get my wife or her family for any occasion. Just take whatever you want out of the account. There. Happy Birthday. My sarcasm is lost as she is totally content with that.
Is this a Korean thing or just my wife (and her family and her friends)? I mean, no one on her side thinks this is weird. For me, I try to tell her that a check or cash is rude. A “I didn’t make any effort to think about what you may want so here’s some $$” type of gift. But they all seem to be totally okay with that.
If I sent my sister a check for her birthday, I think that would be about the most insulting thing I could do. I mean, what’s the point if we just trade checks once a year. “Hey Sis, here’s $300!” On my birthday, “Hey Bro, here’s $300!”
WTF???
And yet how can it be rude if it’s exactly what she wants? Or did I just blow your mind?
I love gift cards, and I totally reject the notion that they don’t show any thought.
My group of friends back in Chicago has a tradition that when someone has a birthday or some other special day, we all chip in $20 or so and buy the person a big gift, something we wouldn’t be able to afford on our own. (Like, a set of All Clad cookware, an iPod, etc.) When I left Chicago, before I went to Bulgaria, I spent a couple weeks with my parents in California. My friends gave me a big gift certificate to an outdoors store near my parents’ house as a going away present. It was an extremely thoughtful gift - they had to search for stores in an area 2,000 miles away, call them up, arrange to buy the gift card over the phone, etc. I bought new hiking shoes and a big backpack - stuff I totally needed. If I had bought them with my own money, I would have gone for something cheaper, but thanks to my friends, I was able to get some really high quality stuff. I was very touched.
Speaking for myself, as a recipient of cash and gift cards- the point is that if my mother gives me cash or my daughter gives me a gift card on my birthday or Christmas, I’ll actually spend that money on something I wouldn’t normally buy for myself. Not on paying a bill, or buying new towels for the house. My daughter could say to me “I was going to give you a $25 gift card for Christmas, so just spend $25 less than you were going to on me , and it will be the same” Except it won’t be, because that $25 will get sucked out of my checking account somehow- and it won’t be on a splurge for me. To a certain extent, that even works if my husband were to give me a gift card- the gift isn’t really the monetary value, but the implied “permission” to splurge. ( I don’t actually need permission to splurge, but I often find it difficult to buy something just because I want it)
On several occasions when me and my wife have been financially strapped and unable to do anything fun my sister has given me gift cards to movie theaters and resturants she knows we like. They have been the best gift I’ve recieved those years because it means we can go to the movies or go out to eat without feeling guilty about wasting money.
What some columnist thinks about gift certificates rates so low on the “important scale” to me a new form of mathematics may have to be created to calculate it.
Actually I’m just glad that since i’m not currently in the US I can miss out on the insincere, dishonest avarice that abounds this time of year. I don’t expect anything from friends or family because getting a gift from someone isn’t how I judge how much I care about them or vice-versa. Yeah, its nice to get a gift, nicer to give someone a gift, but I resent the suggestion that its somehow required. Besides, Christmas is the only time of year when people that normally wouldn’t give you the time of day have the freaking nerve to act like we’re all of a sudden buddies. Listen, you either feel that way all year 'round or not at all. I don’t have a problem telling you I hate the same people 365 days a year…and i’m not getting them presents or gift certificates.
Bah, humbug.
(FYI: Most of the bitterness in this post stems mostly from a lack of sleep and no coffee this morning. Sorry. i’ll probably cheer up in an hour or so)
I wouln’t think so – the concept of negative numbers was established hundreds of years ago.
Or even thousands.
How much I care can only be expressed in negative numbers. 
Negative numbers are needed to express how much the opinion of some journalist matters to me about gift certificates. This whole thing reminds me how much I have always hated the Kay jewelers xmas commercials. I guess I’m just cranky about anything that belittles a gift. I mean, if someone gave you or I a gift certificate for Christmas how could we even dare be upset about it? Its a gift!
Gift cards are great for my younger cousins. I don’t really know them all that well so it’s a good way for them to get something they like. I think they appreciate the thought.
I’m totally in agreement with Bricker on this one. Gift cards definitly can be personalized when you know it’s to a store that the person will like. A lot of people love to be able to spend some time shopping in a favorite store on a gift card. My wife loves gift cards. I think a $100 gift card for Barnes&Noble is about the greatest gift in the world.
My grandmother has hit a marvelous happy-medium with this sort of thing.
One member of the family per year (usually my mother or father, since we’re the ones who live near and visit often) gets a Big Present. She will know, for example, that Dad has his eye on a new riding lawn mower. Thing is, she doesn’t know which one or how much it costs or whatever, and interrogating him over it is going to make things fairly obvious. Also, a riding lawnmower is hard to hide under a tree.
So she gets a very nice card and puts a picture of a riding lawnmower into it along with, oh, a few Home Depot gift cards or some cash. She makes it clear she’s thinking of him and what she knows he wants, but she isn’t imposing her limited knowledge of John Deere on him.
The system seems to work well.