Well, the easy answer is because you know where the money is going, and giving people food is helpful as opposed to money that could be used for something less helpful. But — that could just mean they now have five more bucks they don’t have to spend on food and could spend on whatever they like, so does it really make a difference? On the third hand, maybe they aren’t going to spend a portion of their proceeds on food, so you’ve at least guaranteed them a meal.
There was a guy outside Back Bay who had a sign that read I’M JUST GOING TO SPEND IT ON HOOKERS AND BLOW, and I gave him $5. Otherwise I tended to give beggars a dollar if I happened to have one. My feeling was, the occasional dollar was a cheap fee for not having to belabor the question of whether to give money or not.
Unlikely, but possibly they had already received someone’s carry-out and had no place to store anything additional. There are good reasons to prefer cash, chief among that it is portable and non-perishable.
A friend of mine was told “My buddies and I want to get drunk”, and he gave the guy five dollars.
The Mrs and I went grocery shopping yesterday. I’m quicker than she is so I was waiting in the parking lot. A guy was playing an electric violin. I gave him a couple of bucks because I couldn’t listen and not give him something.
Naw, you can shove a bagel, or a clementine, into your pocket if you want to eat it later. And an offer of something you can’t use right now isn’t worth a dirty look, or a curse.
My second Wife would give they any food she happened to have with her, cupcakes or candy bars. They were always polite, if not as appreciative as they would be of money.
Don’t feel bad. This is a tactic used by some Roma families to bilk you out of money. It was a huge problem in Europe several years ago and it has migrated to the U.S. You can search and find several news stories on it. The women use children to help them get more money. Sometimes, the children beg alone (when they ought to be in school). Some of the families doing this have been found to have large, nice homes in their home country.
That said, it’s a real shame how this is done because sometimes there are families that need real help and are truly in dire straits. But that’s not the case with most.
Huh, the Roma people, or possibly being “pimped”? (somebody mentioned how these women and kids are dropped off for a shift, somehow that feels like some sort of prostitution to me). Anyway, the first never occurred to me while the second did. I have heard rumors over the years that there are Roma in the area(theres probably similar rumors everywhere). I dunno, like I said, I don’t give to everyone I see, it’s just a sort of gut call at the moment usually. I donate to the local food bank and The Rescue Mission here.
If I was a business man and charity was a for profit business(that wouldn’t scorch my soul if I had one), charity seems like a solid bet. I’ve watched the Rescue Mission grow and grow and expand their “customer base” until now it seems they are one of the main social support organisations around here. Very successful in a perverse perspective.
Almost certainly as he has been dead for over 600 years.
I do not give money to beggars.
I concur- I do give generously to buskers (at least they are trying).
I’d say sometimes I don’t, sometimes I do, but pretty much this. If I were on the street and miserable I might be buying drugs or alcohol as well. So I try not to judge. The more money they have, the more chance they’ll have something leftover to get a sandwich after spending money on beer (or whatever).
I’m fairly cynical about the odds that individual tough love will ever work with some of these folks. Some people are literally unemployable for whatever reason and will fall through the cracks of society. Not to mention public funds are generally inadequate to help everyone who could make use of it. So a momentary miniscule alleviation of misery seems worthwhile from my perspective. I can afford it.
But like I said I’m hardly consistent about it. I go by a combination of half-assed intuition and whether I have any spare cash on hand.
No, I never give to beggars. Often they are professionals anyway, or at least in the places where I have been. In the Third World beggars can be really aggressive and persistent, I just kept well away from them and refused to talk to them.
On the other hand, I give money to street performers and musicians. I feel they have earned it.
My professor used to say that suicide and begging (i.e. for both the beggar and the person being asked) are the most difficult philosophical questions. Neither can be addressed solely from the legal framework; nor can we make generalizable rules. One might want to kill oneself because living is too painful (as in the case of a severe, debilitating accident). But one’s loved ones might object. Begging is also too difficult an issue to confront. On the humanitarian front, seems simple enough: give a person what you can afford to/ what you might want to give. I do give, but it depends on how much change I happen to be carrying in my pocket. I keep spare change handy always, and there’s more in my wallet, which i keep in my backpack. Sometimes, if i’ve spent the change, I hesitate to pull out my wallet; sometimes i just walk away. But I always wonder about the incident–whether I give or not–for a good day or two after.
I fully concede I’m probably an asshole, but where I live it seems like there’s a panhandler at every major intersection, has been for about 10 years now, and I don’t like it. I don’t give money to them and I never will.
Living “in the country” I have never seen an actual dedicated panhandler.
Vacationing in St Martin we met a guy who was was down on his luck. He told us the ATM was broken and he couldn’t get money (there is a machine located everywhere) so he was asking for one dollar. I wanted to give him some cash, but only had twenties, so I gave him one.
He thanked us, then stopped traffic so we could pull out from where we were parked. Anytime he saw us that year he would chat, stop traffic if need be, and refuse any more cash. A few times we specifically got doggie bags for him.
We saw him each year for 8 or so years, always giving him $20, sometimes sharing a meal. One year he wasn’t around. We asked a few restaurateurs and one of them remembered him and knew he had died. We memorialized him. I ordered drinks and we toasted to his life. He was a good guy.
I have sometimes given a few bucks. A guy who was clearly homeless was just sitting with his dog outside a Circle K. He had no sign and didn’t ask for money. I gave him a couple of bucks.
After I had to put my kitty to sleep I had an unopened bag of dry cat food in my back seat. I was at a different Circle K a month or two later and saw a woman with a sign that said please give me and my cat food. So I did - the unopened bag; she was thrilled.
I see a lot of people give dog food and water to homeless guys with dogs.
It is pretty well established that panhandling is growing as an organized business. People get hired to hold signs that others make and there are territories that the pimps control. These “homeless” have their kids out in the sun playing next to a freeway offramp which, if not really homeless, I consider abuse. Many times the homeless have better jackets and hiking boots than I have which is highly suspicious. Now many of you will say, “Cad, you don’t know they’re not homeless. Life circumstances can change” and that is true, but I highly suspect many of them choose begging rather than work and may not even be homeless so I choose to give my money to those that I know need help - my local food bank and women’s shelters.
The above is incoherent, but if you meant I should have still felt proud about giving a few bucks to the nice Hotel Lady, I guess I’ll have to spell it out for you. 90% of the money I gave her will go straight to her pimp. Maybe you like giving prostitutes money-I don’t. WI a cop had seen me? I could have been arrested. So you just go on and continue sitting there on your high horse and decry me down. This isn’t the Pit so I’ll shut up now, other than to say get a f. clue.
The sentence should have read “BTW, cute anecdote-but using it to justify not giving anything to anyone since then? Wow.”
Of course, using a singular anecdote to justify lack of charity isn’t unique, but it still sucks.
If you want to help the homeless, give to a shelter, preferably one with psychologists and social workers who can attempt to address the root problems.
Giving a few bucks to panhandlers just enables and reinforces the maladaptive behavior patterns that made them homeless in the first place. In the short term, it may give you a smug warm fuzzy feeling, but in the long term, it makes the problem worse.