God is bipolar.
God is no respecter of persons
You forgot
4.) Expecting us to fix it ourselves.
You mean things like hurricanes, flash floods, earthquakes and the like? On behalf of Mankind, I apologize for causing those things to happen, and will try to do better in the future.
I’m sorry I caused all that cancer.
Yup, and off his meds.
I was told over and over in catholic grammar school that WE were made in god’s image. This makes more sense to me since we created “him”.
(sings XTC) “And the devil too..”
Google auto fill-ins for “God is a[n]”:
[ul]astronaut
[li]DJ[/li][li]ETA: Oops, the third should have been “Hi, Opal!”[/li][li]jealous god[/li][li]awesome god[/li][li]american[/li][li]englishman[/li][li]automaton[/li][*]iron[/ul]
And you get many more results if you put in a first letter to follow “a[n]”.
My favorite: “God is a fist”. Original painting, direct from the artist. Only 30 bucks.
I’d put that on my wall, except I already have plenty of original paintings, from artists just as good, who gave them to me for free.
A metal band should make a song and an album with “God is a fist” as the title.
And I can’t tell. Are those man-boobies or woman-boobies?
Who cares what kind of boobies they are? Boobies are proof that God ain’t all bad.
God is inordinately fond of beetles. He’s not too crazy about primates.
How about Verve Pipe, “Photograph”.
“When i’m alone and the world is a fist,…”
There’s plenty more where that came from…
If God is a sadist, then the afterlife is gonna suck.
I’m in the photograph… I’m in the photograph!! I’m in the photograhph!
Picture this!
Rather to live in such a way to mitigate the effects of such disasters. Like not building on flood plains, for instance. Or building earthquake-resistant homes.
Do you know why cities and towns are built on waterways, or why fertile valleys tend to flood? If expensive earthquake-resistant homes were required, do you know how many more people would be out on the streets? A large percentage of people live where and how they have to-not where and how they want to.
Indeed, and to stop being flooded, some cultures build their houses on stilts. And in Japan they used to build houses which would not do so much damage when they collapsed. Or they built water systems to store water for the dry season and to prevent flooding in the wet - Ankor Wat.
There are also things that nobody knew, such as that straight, concrete-lined drainage ditches increase flooding. Intuitively, one would think (and engineers used to) that this would simply enhance run-off. But in practice, it funnels big peaks and high-water-events to the same place and time. Today, engineers know this.
(In Los Angeles, they are working on breaking up the big concrete “rivers” and doing planting along the paths. Sometimes, nature knows best.)
(Not always, please! I’m not that kind of Luddite! Smallpox is much, much better gone!)
Didn’t work so well when they got nuked, did it.