And what about the woman’s who prompted the bouncer’s action, the “tattler”? She must have been told by years of legislative action that if a guy as much as makes her feel sexually threatened, she is in her full right to have the guy presecuted by the autorities fast as lightning and in every way possible.
The other example mentioned in this thread, shows the same phenomenon: a guy with Tourette’s accidentally bumping a waitress and having the shit being kicked out of him by three men “rescuing the damsel”.
I don’t feel that legal action is going to cure stupid anytime soon. What it rather does is changing the focus of stupid every decade or so. Right now that focus is, IMHO, too much on “protecting the sexual innocent from sexual predators” which is really, IMHO, the old “sex is dirrty, women are sexless, let’s sexualize any situation we can think of, and :: drool:: let’s condemn anyone indulging in sex, so we can here every dirrty sinful detail”. Only now that old focus is wearing a shiny new jacket and having a modern haircut.
[QUOTE=magellan01]
Come on, Miller. Did you see how she dresses? She is* trying *to look like a guy and does a damn good job at it.
[/QUOTE]
No, she’s trying to dress in a way that makes her feel comfortable.
And even if she were trying to look like a guy, so fucking what? Once she verified that she was, indeed, a woman, she should have been left to do her thing. No-one’s blaming the bouncer for investigating the situation in the first place, or for questioning her, but once she made clear that she was a woman that should have been the end of it.
For me, the most amazing thing (as already observed by Miller) is that a bouncer in a Greenwich Village restaurant could be such a drooling moron as to not know that some lesbians look and dress like that. And the woman who reported the “guy in the bathroom” is also some sort of retard.
[QUOTE=treis]
No, we’re not. 99.99% of people are perfectly served by the traditional male/female bathrooms. The entire system is not going to change for a tiny fraction of people at the detriment of almost everyone else.
She was offered a free dinner at the restaurant. Asking for anything more than that and an apology is money grubbing. Sticking your face in front of every camera you can find is attention whoring. This woman should not be praised as an activist. She should be scorned as the menace she is.
[/QUOTE]
As I understand it, unisex bathrooms are much more common in other countries and are not mandatory in the US. I’m more comfortable in separate facilities, but I’m sure I could learn to adjust.
She doesn’t have to sue for her own financial gain. She could force them to take a public stand against discrimination (in the form of a PSA or the like). She could give the money to a related organization. She could use the incident to open the eyes of lots of people. Suing doesn’t have to be a “get rich quick” scheme.
[QUOTE=treis]
I can’t say I blame the bouncer. She does look a lot like a dude, and it sounds like it was a honest mistake. An apology ought to be sufficient, but of course it’s not going to be. She’s probably seeing dollar signs and a chance to be famous. The LGBT crowd is going to make this an ‘issue’ about discrimination or whatever, when in fact it is nothing more than a mistake.
[/QUOTE]
Didn’t bother to read the links, did you? An honest mistake would have been, “Oh, thanks for showing me your identification. I’m sorry that I bothered you. You see, someone complained and my employer sent me in here to rectify the situation. I’m glad it’s okay.”
[QUOTE=magellan01]
Come on, Miller. Did you see how she dresses? She is* trying *to look like a guy and does a damn good job at it.
[/QUOTE]
Please tell me this is a whoosh so I can go back to thinking you’re just a regular idiot. Are you seriously blaming the victim here?
Did you see the way she dresses? She’s trying to look like a man? For fuck’s sake, she’s trying to look like herself. She was born with that face and body, douchebag!
I don’t wear makeup; I wear jeans and t-shirts every single day. When I had short hair, I was constantly being called a dyke. Was I asking for that because I am not feminine enough?
I guess some people do think we need to go back to women and men wearing certain styles of hair and clothing just so they can tell who they are dealing with. Heaven forbid that a woman should happen to look masculine and not try to girl herself up! She deserves to be treated shabbily.
[QUOTE=magellan01]
Come on, Miller. Did you see how she dresses? She is* trying *to look like a guy and does a damn good job at it. When this story appeared on TV and she first appeared on the screen walking down the street, I thouhgt it was simply a guy walkiing down the street as an establishing shot and they were going to then cut or pan to the woman in the story. When it turned out to be her I was quite surprised.
[/QUOTE]
What is the ladies room for? Women, or just people who look as you would expect women to look like?
Refusing to check the ID is not “a mistake.”
[/QUOTE]
My guess is that he refused to look at the ID because he assumed she was a MTF transsexual who had her sex legally changed, but he didn’t want that to stop him from throwing her out. So, I agree, it wasn’t a mistake.
[QUOTE=magellan01]
Come on, Miller. Did you see how she dresses? She is* trying *to look like a guy and does a damn good job at it. When this story appeared on TV and she first appeared on the screen walking down the street, I thouhgt it was simply a guy walkiing down the street as an establishing shot and they were going to then cut or pan to the woman in the story. When it turned out to be her I was quite surprised.
[/QUOTE]
Yes, I’ve seen how she dresses. That’s kinda the point. Women should be allowed to dress how they want, and shouldn’t be punished or discriminated against because they don’t appear sufficiently feminine. I don’t blame the bouncer for making the initial mistake. I do blame him, and his employers, for how he handled the situation after that mistake was made.
Well, that’s not technically accurate. Because, when she and her party were thrown out of the restaurant, they were made to pay for their orders, despite the fact that they had not yet been served. So what the restaurant really did there was offer to give them the meal they paid for, several days late. That’s not an apology, that’s just extremely slow service.
Menace? Bullshit. She was actively discriminated against by the bouncer, and the restaurant has taken no steps at all to remedy that. She deserves money for how she was treated, and the restaurant deserves the media beating they’re getting. I look forward to the miserable fuckers closing down because of this.
[QUOTE=CarnalK]
I feel I should explain what kind of irked me about the OP. IANAL but this bit:
seems in the first half a bit of an abuse of process. IMHO, lawsuits should be used to recover direct damages - not publicize political campaigns.
[/QUOTE]
Damn all those people suing to advance their political goals: civils rights, disability rights, workers rights, privacy rights. :rolleyes:
[QUOTE=magellan01]
Come on, Miller. Did you see how she dresses? She is* trying *to look like a guy and does a damn good job at it. When this story appeared on TV and she first appeared on the screen walking down the street, I thouhgt it was simply a guy walkiing down the street as an establishing shot and they were going to then cut or pan to the woman in the story. When it turned out to be her I was quite surprised.
[/QUOTE]
So, YOU need to start re-thinking your gender stereotypes. Just because YOU made an gender assumption based on your narrow world view, don’t assume motivations you don’t know are true.
[QUOTE=Fionn]
Damn all those people suing to advance their political goals: civils rights, disability rights, workers rights, privacy rights. :rolleyes:
[/QUOTE]
Yes, well let’s all wish Ms Farmer luck in finally forcing bar owners to let lesbians into the women’s washroom.
[QUOTE=Miller]
Well, that’s not technically accurate. Because, when she and her party were thrown out of the restaurant, they were made to pay for their orders, despite the fact that they had not yet been served. So what the restaurant really did there was offer to give them the meal they paid for, several days late. That’s not an apology, that’s just extremely slow service.
[/QUOTE]
Really? They had to pay for food they weren’t served? I don’t think i saw that in the stories i read.
They would have been well within their rights, i think, to tell the restaurant to go fuck themselves with regard to the money. I can’t imagine what made them think they should actually accede to the order to pay up.
[QUOTE=Miller]
Because, when she and her party were thrown out of the restaurant, they were made to pay for their orders, despite the fact that they had not yet been served.
[/QUOTE]
I did a bit of searching, and according to this NYT article:
Doesn’t make the bouncer any less of a dick, of course, but at least the restaurant didn’t actually steal from them.
[QUOTE=mhendo]
Really? They had to pay for food they weren’t served? I don’t think i saw that in the stories i read.
They would have been well within their rights, i think, to tell the restaurant to go fuck themselves with regard to the money. I can’t imagine what made them think they should actually accede to the order to pay up.
[/QUOTE]
According to the interview, they didn’t want to give the restaurant anything to use against them.
[QUOTE=Miller]
Well, that’s not technically accurate. Because, when she and her party were thrown out of the restaurant, they were made to pay for their orders, despite the fact that they had not yet been served. So what the restaurant really did there was offer to give them the meal they paid for, several days late. That’s not an apology, that’s just extremely slow service.
[/QUOTE]
That was the part that blew my mind. I would have been totally flabbergasted. “So, you’re throwing me out because you don’t like the way I look, and you expect me to pay for a meal I didn’t get? Here’s your payment, dickwad --” <rude gesture> “–Call the cops if you ant anything more.”
Personally, I wouldn’t sue; too much trouble. But I don’t blame her one little bit for doing so.
[QUOTE=Inner Stickler]
According to the interview, they didn’t want to give the restaurant anything to use against them.
[/QUOTE]
Understandable.
Personally, if a restaurant wanted to kick me out for no reason after i had eaten my appetizer, but before my main course was served, i’d be tempted to tell them to go fuck themselves if they wanted payment for the appetizer.
Going to a restaurant is about an overall experience, and if they want to kick someone out for no good reason in the middle of the meal, they haven’t provided that experience and should be willing to take the hit in the wallet.
But, as Miller says, hopefully they’ll take an even bigger long-term hit after all this publicity.