Just my opinion.
Our lives in the modern U.S. (pardon to the Dopers who are international) are pretty mundane in the scope of world history. Whereas the past is sparked with constant turmoil, and some nations experience horrific loss everyday (via mindless acts of random violence), to the U.S. it is relatively unique and rare.
Oh, we are a violent society. Many people die from crime each year, but most of those are not random. This is why it grips us so much.
Yes, hundreds of children die from accidents every year (and these are traumatic and scary), but a violent act taking the lives of those from a place like Sandyhook Elementary is something that polarizes people. It grabs their attention, just like the Boston Marathon bombing did.
For many accidents, many folks comfort themselves, saying “I would never drive that way”, or " I always watch my (insert danger to loved one)". Accidents offer that sense of randomness, that there was nothing that could be done OR that you can prevent it.
Random acts of violence, they just cannot be controlled for. Who, in their right mind, thinks they have to worry about some idiot blowing up the local foot race? Who prepares for that contingency?
I spoke to my parents after it(Boston), and they were focused on the man who had his wife and daughter both injured. They sought to empathize with them because they honestly could not relate to the emotional impact on a realistic scale.
Their lives (my parents) were not interrupted by the tragedy of something like this. Their sons grew up, got married, prospered, etc… Much like the vast majority of Americans.
I think the relative rarity of large, unexpected losses of life caused by random violence, coupled with media coverage, only brings these feelings to the forefront.
Yes, the over-dramatic acting by public figures is enough to make anyone a little sick to the stomach. But, the visceral reaction many people feel is sincere because they do not know how to cope with the idea of some event senselessly ripping loved ones away or unalterably changing their lives.
I agree with some that it is an expression of impotence, an inability to prevent something like this from happening to them or someone they love. Many seek to give money or take some other action that is not going to change the fact that they have no control over these events.
They want desperately to empathize, but they lack a certain perspective which allows them to empathize on a truly personal level. Thus, in an effort to express their desire to empathize, they over do it sometimes. For most it is sincere, but more focused on their own anxiety over not having control over everything that could affect their loved one’s lives.
My 2 cents.