Going back to school at 41?

In My Humble Opinion
1

Tomorrow is my 41st birthday. Although I have a good marriage, wonderful family and I try to embrace the positives in my life, I’m not especially happy with my life as a whole. It really comes down to class status. I work in retail for a great company and my job is as secure as retail jobs can get, but I’m unfulfilled and I don’t really want to continue to work in retail.

I’ve finally decided that I don’t want to continue living right on the edge of utter poverty. Well, I may actually be officially impoverished this year. I want to turn my life around and I’ll need an education for that.

I’ve thought about the things I enjoy and am interested in health and wellness related careers. I think, in general, people are starting to recognize the problems associated with poor health and boomers are starting to really feel their age, so the industry is going to grow exponentially in years to come. I would like to help people understand how to achieve better health and maintain healthier lives, including how to eat well-balanced diets, maintaining an active life, and making positive changes that last (I’m trying to do these things myself). Or maybe I’d like to work with athletes to improve overall health and performance while maintaining health as I’m in awe of what the human body at its peak of wellness can achieve.

What inspires me are my own experiences with trying to achieve a healthier lifestyle (I’m still working on that) and working with my customers in their healthy pursuits as related to their feet. Specifically, I’ve given instruction on transitioning to minimalist style of running. I’ve learned so much about it on my own, it’s only natural to pass along all that knowledge, although I’d prefer to do it in a more professional capacity. I’m just a shoe salesperson with a passion, after all. I’m also interested in nutrition and would like to learn much more about how it impacts both individual health and societal wellness. I eat very differently these days.

Anyway, I’d considered massage therapy since it’s tangentially related and would get me working in a minimum amount of time (six months to certification), but it’s not panning out for a variety of reasons. Although I can certainly see the validity and value of massage therapy, it’s not exactly what I want to do.

I really think I should not be afraid of thinking more long-term and getting the education I never got as a young adult. I went to community college for a semester at age 19 and dropped out to have my son. I lacked the discipline to ever go back. I did okay in high school; probably could have done a lot better if I’d had more maturity, but high school was a social hell for me. I’ve always been told I’m quite intelligent, but I feel less so now. I still enjoy learning, though, I’m worried about my lack of skill at some aspects of it, such as writing and advanced math. I can’t really compose my thoughts as well as I could years ago. I struggled greatly with algebra in high school; Alg. I was the only class I failed as I dropped it my senior year out of frustration.

I realize a science degree is going to entail a great deal of this, but that’s ultimately what I want. I do want to challenge myself, but I’m very nervous. I enjoy reading about anatomy and physiology, but I do not enjoy trying to understand formulas. Will I ever get it? Am I kidding myself? Should I take an aptitude test before I enroll? Should I even pursue a degree in a science?

My tentative plan was to enroll in the community college in the Associate of Science program and decide while I was there what direction I want to take, whether its nutrition, exercise physiology, or physical therapy.

2

I’m 33 and back in school! Go for it!

3

My mom went back to school when she was older than you are (50s) when I was in junior and senior high school. My mother’s a smart lady in many ways, but she was never a great student, and was nervous about going back to school in the beginning. During school she went through every emotion imaginable, from pride at good grades, to frustration at bad grades, a sense of accomplishment after completing a lengthy research paper, to near-tears at feeling bad due to cranky 19 year olds in her class being shitty and visibly annoyed by the “old lady” who didn’t move as quickly as they did, and needed help with the computron.

Aside from being a little rusty at something she was never that great at to begin with, my mother has absolutely zero tech savvy (you’re clearly way ahead of her, as demonstrated by your ability to post here – seriously, she would not be able to figure this thing out) she was married with five children, and working full time. She initially took very limited classes, but grew tired of how long it was taking to complete her degree, and so she ramped up the schooling. There was a period when we barely even saw her. Straight from work to school, then home at around 9:30 every night. It wasn’t easy, but she was so damn proud of herself when she got her degree and I was damn proud of her too. I might have cried maybe a little bit at her graduation.

It’s tough, but if you’re anything like my mom, it’ll be both challenging and rewarding. It’s of course a whole different ball game from going to college straight after high school like I did, but it can be done. My mother did it. That’s not a knock at her, which it always seems like to me when someone says “If So and So can do it, so can you!” I mean damn, what are you saying about So and So? Nothing bad in this case, except that she was old (as far as students go), busy as balls, was not so good at math, and is of those people who doesn’t test well even in subjects she’s good at* but made it happen. Whatever you decide to do, I sincerely wish you the best of luck.
*I know there are snobby students everywhere who dismiss not testing well as a cover-up for not being bright or not knowing the material, but honestly, if I were to ask her a question that was on the test, she’d know the answer. Put a pencil in her hand and time her, and she freezes up. My biggest advice to her was “Relax.”

4

I’m about the same age, feeling about the same way…but not quite ready yet. I just wanted to applaud you and let you know I’m interested to hear what you decide.

5

My wife, who is in her mid-Fifties, is taking on-line courses from Benedictine University to get her Masters in organizational development. She’s doing fine; graduates in March.

I told her that if she wanted to do this thing, I’d cook and do dishes every evening she had schoolwork. We eat a lot of pan-fried foods and one-skillet meals ;). Try to get a similar concession from your hubby :D:D:D

I also proof-read her papers. I tell her I’m worth an additional seven points. :wink:

6

I’m 40 and back in school full-time.

It’s both harder AND easier than I thought it would be. It depends on the exact part of it we’re talking about!

7

Go for it, Brown Eyed Girl!

And happy birthday!

8

Thank you for all the encouragement! While I’m somewhat concerned about going back to school in general, what is really giving me pause is my choice of study. I really don’t know if I’m cut out for it. Also, I’ve spent my whole life avoiding risk because I’m not confident in my choices (I’ve made some spectacularly poor ones), so I’m second-guessing all of it. What if I spend loads of time in school to get a degree, incur tons of student debt on top of an already abysmal credit rating, and I can’t get a job because I chose the wrong profession, took the wrong classes, or went to the wrong school? Then, I’m back where I started working retail in a deeper financial hole than I began with. I work with plenty of college graduates and at one time I used to pat myself on the back for not spending a huge amount of money for a career in retail. Then I realized *they *had choices and upward mobility, *they *eventually moved on, bought homes, went on vacations; and, still, here I am. :frowning:

Well, my hubby takes wonderful care of me already. I’m a handful and he’s a trooper. He cooks already and does laundry. But here’s the kicker. The economy has really taken its toll on us and he’s been out of work or underemployed for a few years now. Which is pretty much what’s inspiring this change in me. We got by on his salary, never did well, but this is terrible. He got all his education in the military and, at one time, that was all he needed. Not so much these days. A lack of secondary education and a degree is extremely limiting in this highly competitive market, regardless of military experience. I had always hoped he resume college and get a degree, but he never did. He was too comfortable in his job. Until now.

When I mentioned to him that I was done with this lifestyle and it’s now or never, I’m going back, he indicated that he would like to do the same. I don’t even know if it’s possible for us both to go at the same time, but if he’s not working, he may as well go, too. We are dead broke and it doesn’t look like its getting better, so what’s the alternative? Can we both get federal assistance and grants, so we can both get degrees concurrently? I don’t even know how that works. The upside is we share interests, so we’d likely be taking the same courses and can study together. His strengths are more technical than mine and he’s done the hard math in his military training. I’m better at the humanities and can help him with that.

The downside is that we have a daughter in 7th grade and I fear this will negatively impact her because we will be so busy. However, she’s also getting to the age where she is engaging in more social and extracurricular activities as school, so she is busier and will be spending less time with us than in the past. I’m torn in wondering if its selfish to go back now and we should wait until she’s out of high school or if its in her best interest that we attempt to improve our financial future as soon as possible. I’m leaning towards the latter. I feel terrible when I can’t give her the things she clearly needs or wants. She misses out on a great deal of enrichment opportunities simply because we just don’t have the money. It’s probably too late to change that even if we’re in school, but at least we can try to be less of a burden on her as an adult.

9

I went back to school in my 30s to finish my bachelor’s and am now close to finishing my PhD and turning 40 next month.

I’d say go for it if it’s what you want to do.

10

Before you commit to a career-preparation program, talk it over with the school’s placement and/or counseling services to find out whether there are actually jobs in that field out there.

Get mentally prepared to have to take review or remedial courses in the areas in which you are weak, to get up to speed. Strong basics make everything further down the line easier.

Math is essential for anything science-related. If the placement people toss you all the way back to grade-school arithmetic – suck it up and go back. Don’t rush things. You actually need to understand this stuff to get where you want to go, not merely to have attended the classes.

Succeeding at a steady job and maintaining a stable family life are difficult things. You have done those, so you have proven that you can do difficult things. School will be do-able! :slight_smile:

11

Tell me more…if you have time.

Thank you! :smiley:

12

Well, school is easier than work, though I don’t really have my weekends free any longer. But the stresses are different. I’m competing with people with a lot more energy and enthusiasm than I can generally muster. Oh, and I’m definitely the old person in my classes, which is both amusing and a little frustrating. I’m tired more than they are, and more set in my ways, but I’m also simply more experienced in dealing with certain kinds of frustrations and rules and with having to put in the work.

The type of school, how much time you currently have free, your support system, etc. all make a huge difference. Debt is manageable if you’re going into either a field that you think you can love and/or a field with a lot of growth.

Having less free time isn’t necessarily a relationship harmer. Just being in the same room with your loved ones while you’re all doing your own thing can still enable everyone to feel connected and not ignored.

If you can do the same classes as your spouse, that can be fantastic, or not so fantastic. If either of you is competitive, it can be a very bad thing to compete so directly, but the support you can give one another is useful.

13

Go for it!

I’m 30, and just returned to school this year. I’m sitting in the campus center as I type this. I’m at a community college, so I don’t need to declare a major right away. Makes life a bit easier.

My advice: start with one class. Just one. Choose one that has some appeal to you but will count towards your degree. Math, writing, history, economics, etc. are all good choices. This helps you get back in the rhythm of school. Next term, take two classes, if you feel you can handle it. The point is, just go. Start.

The worst part, for me, is feeling old. All my classes are full of kids. I feel very, very out of place.

Oh, and a happy birthday!

14

Oh this is good practical advice. I appreciate it.

It looks like my college will assess me by giving me a COMPASS test. I have SAT prep software from 2004 that I bought for my son to study from. Hopefully, that will help me brush up my skills. Honestly, the COMPASS practice questions in the math section brought tears to my eyes. I probably have better math skills than I give myself credit for, although not that great, but there are some serious psychological barriers there. How do I get past this?

Does anyone have any recommendations for a website that will help me re-learn math?

15

I’m not so worried about feeling old because I work with young people in retail. My supervisors are generally younger than me. This just underscores the reality that I am going nowhere fast.

Thank you too!

16

Roomie is older than the OP, and she went back to school. She earned an AS in Nursing and is now an RN. She’s currently working on her BS in Nursing, and will finish in February.

17

I remember your posts on Vibram shoes, Brown Eyed Girl, and it was the final push that got me to splurge for a pair. I’m still using them for my occasional runs, so thanks!

Based on what you wrote above, I think a degree in one of the allied health careers can be a good choice for you. I’m somewhat younger than you at 26, but I just recently went back to school to pursue a master’s degree in nutritional science because of all the reasons that you listed above. There’s a few older students in my classes and they do mention having less energy and time than the younger students, but for the most part, they take classes more seriously, have more confidence, and have more life experiences to draw from.

If you are interested in the nutrition field, you can look into becoming a registered dietitian. However, it requires a 4-year degree and an internship which is becoming more competitive every year as more students become interested in nutrition. One of the best things about nutrition though, is that it’s a very flexible field and you can have several different career paths. Based on your interest in athletics, you can get a sports nutrition credential from some schools and map out a career in sports dietetics.

Other allied health careers include physical therapy, occupational therapy, dental hygiene, nursing, medical lab technology, and plenty of others. The great thing about allied health careers is that they all take most of the same pre-requisite classes, so you don’t have to make a choice right now. Take 1 or 2 night classes at the local community college while you work and talk with your fellow students. Go to the career center before you make the big choice. You’ll probably have at least a year or two before you have to start taking more specific classes for your major.

Good luck and happy birthday, Brown Eyed Girl! I hope this year will bring you the happiness you want.

18

Ooh, this is kind of long, sorry.

I’m 48 and just finishing my B.A. so it’s definitely possible to go back to school and succeed. As for the math, I was a terrible math student in high school, but I have a lot of math confidence now. When I went back to school I started at a community college with pre-algebra, and I took my time and really tried to learn it rather than just trying to pass it. Passing statistics two years later is still one of my biggest accomplishments!

Now, another few years later I am literally 9 class meetings away from graduating with a B.A. in Behavioral Science. I can’t even believe that’s true, it was a long, hard road. I’ve spent the last two years working 35 hrs per week and taking btwn 6 and 12 units per term.

Here are the parts of my experience that might be helpful to you:

Yes, everyone might be younger, but I felt the way you seem to-meh, I like young people and they seem to like me, so not really a problem. Some of my classes felt like they were filled with the sweathogs from welcome back kotter though, and that was frustrating. Sometimes I wanted to hiss at the brats in the back to hush up so I could listen and get my money’s worth.

Be prepared to give up your friends and your weekends. Even my very best friends have only seen me a handful of times in the last few years. I hope they’ll recognize me when I try to rejoin the social world. I spend all of my weekends doing laundry and homework. Any extra time (heh) is spent staring at the wall in an exhausted fugue state.

Find yourself an editor. Make sure you have someone with excellent writing and grammar skills to go over your essays and term papers before you turn them in. It’s hard to come back from a bad grade on an important paper.

Plot out all of the classes you need for your whole degree before you take a single class. That way if you can’t get one of the classes you need when you’re registering for a semester, you’ll know what other ones to grab as a plan B. This will save you from taking classes you don’t need or missing classes you do need and not being able to get them at the end.

Use your electives to branch out and try new things, fun things. That’s what they’re for.

Also one thing that I’ve really missed is reading for pleasure. I have a stack of novels on my bedside table waiting for me and I can’t wait for the chance to get started plowing through it. Find a way to reward yourself for each milestone. You really can do this if you’re willing to work hard and hang in there.

Good luck!

19

I’m starting in January myself. I’ll be 42 before the first class starts. I have a little bit of a cheat though. I’m going with my 22 year old daughter. We’ll be taking different classes but it’s nice to have someone to get the ball rolling with.

I have no idea what I’m going to focus on. I’m starting with the developmental classes (I think; the Compass test is next week but it’s been 20 years since I was in school so I’m guessing I’ll need them) and I know I really want to take Spanish but other than that I haven’t the slightest idea. Speech pathology sounds cool. Occupational therapy seems promising. There’s always ads for them anyway and I know from taking my daughter every week for three years what the job is like.

What I’m most nervous about is my poor writing skills and this internet surfing habit. I have no idea how to fix the first one but I’m taking some classes online so maybe that will ease me in to actually working for something instead of randomly surfing. I hope!

Best wishes to us both, Brown Eyed Girl!

20

When I was in my 40s, I decided to make a career change. So I went back to school to get another degree. It was a great experience! True, a few of my classmates were young enough to be my kids, but we all got along–we were all studying for the same degree, after all.

You can do it. Good luck!