I don’t know… maybe Brisbane? Yeah, I think we’re biting off more than we can chew here, but I will be happy with whatever we get. (As long as there’s a 'roo. And no spiders).
Oooookaaaay…
You will find roos - even if you don’t make a special effort to find them.
But even if you make a special effort to avoid the spiders - they’ll find you. Eventually. When you least expect them…
You might find some interesting things on this site: http://www.visitvictoria.com/Regions/Great-Ocean-Road.aspx
I’ve linked directly to the Great Ocean Road section of the site, but you can click through to other regions, including Melbourne.
Cairns to Brisbane is 19 hours of drive time, and it’s the monsoon season in December, so there’s no guarantees that the roads will be passable. If you want to go to Brisbane, fly. If you want some coasty beachy time, hang out in Cairns, OR go north of Brisbane to the Sunshine Coast, or south of Brisbane to the Gold Coast.
Darn, just lost a longer post. Short version? Cairns beaches aren’t all that. And if you come from Florida, like the OP, don’t bother about Australian beaches. I mean, they’re better than Florida beaches (;)) but not so much better I’d waste precious vacation time on them.
As to December in Cairns it is the wet season but it’s not a proper monsoon like in Asia when it rains every day. It is the cyclone (hurricane) season but you’d have to be extremely unlucky to be affected by one, and the risk is probably lower for the OP than at home in Florida anyway.
Finally, it isn’t the 1970’s. The highway from Cairns to Brisbane only gets cut in very extreme floods these days, which really isn’t that probable, and even then it would only be a matter of waiting a day or so maximum for floodwater to go down.
Thanks for the link, Eliahna! I think I need to do some studying and see if we can cut this trip to manageable size.
As for me, I could leave the reef out (though it’s no doubt better than any old Florida reef). 
But Mr. Beetle is ready to do some preparatory snorkeling this weekend.
If it was me, and I was contemplating a 14+ hour flight over, and seven days later another 14+ hour flight to get home, and I knew that I’d probably be fairly jet lagged the first day or two… I’d opt to see as much as I could of the area around where I was staying and not tie up more of my precious time on domestic flights. YMMV, and of course the reef is so very worth seeing, but for such a short visit it might be worth saving it for next time (if extending your stay isn’t an option).
Update: We made it! If you saw a couple of American morons driving on the wrong side of the road or trying to order “regular” coffee in the last couple of weeks, that might have been us.
We landed in Brisbane, and drove to Lorne. I was freaking out about my husband learning to drive on the left side of the road, but after knocking our fender off on a parked car, he got fairly proficient at it. 
We went a bit further along the Great Ocean Road to the Twelve Apostles, which were really stunning. The scenery along the road was just gorgeous too. It was so cool seeing all the wild parrots…friendly little things, aren’t they? I think it was in Lorne, as I watched cockatoos and ate a ham sandwich that inexplicably involved beets, that I first began to feel that we were in a foreign country.
We also made it to Erskine Falls. So this is a rain forest! After that, I was getting anxious to see a roo, so we stopped by Anglesea Golf Course. I also saw a wild roo at a distance, hopping down a rocky slope. It was kind of eerie seeing one for the first time…they’re such large animals and move in such an unexpected way. I felt like I was spotting a yeti or something.
We then moved on to Albury, had some great wine and food at some cellar door in that area. Speaking of food, we were surprised to learn that Australian restaurants don’t do doggie bags. We adjusted ourselves to that fact and ate everything in sight. Then on through beautiful mountains to Jindabyne Lake.
Next destination was Canberra, where we checked out another cellar door (gotta love those!) By this time, we’d seen a ton of dead roos (and tasted some), but out in the countryside here we got to see some wild ones close up. So so cool.
We spent one night in Sydney, which is the only place that has ever made Mr. Beetle nervous to drive in. All those tunnels! Sydney seemed not unlike New York from what we could tell. We walked up and had a look at the opera house and harbor, and as usual, ate like pigs.
From there we flew to Cairns, where we spent the remainder of our trip, about four days. It was nice and hot, just like home. As Princhester recommended, we took the Reef Magic snorkeling trip to the Great Barrier Reef. It was strongly recommended that we take seasickness meds, and I’m so glad we did. It was really rough the day we went out. About twenty minutes into the trip, half the passengers were chumming off the back of the boat. Reef Magic has a sort of mascot, this big old maori wrasse…and as soon as we got in the water, here he came! That was pretty mind-blowing to me. It’s so cool that this fish is always there, hanging out with the people. I saw one of the underwater photographers rubbing his head, and then she just kind of grabbed him and stuck him next to the scuba divers she was taking a picture of. Far out. We had the best time that day.
Another kick-ass thing I got to do in Cairns was hold a koala. They handed Harvey over to me and I kissed him and cuddled him and told him he was a good little wolla beaw. I could tell he was super impressed because he kept his eyes open for a moment.
So anyway, that was about it. We had a wonderful wonderful time. Everyone was so nice and their accents were lovely. If we had our dog with us, we’d have just wanted to stay on indefinitely. Everything we saw was amazing. I didn’t see a spider or a snake the whole time. Vegemite, though…what is up with that? :eek:
Wow! Sounds like it was a great trip.
Trip of a lifetime. We’re so depressed to be home right now. 
You drove from Brisbane to Lorne? I am impressed! It’s a helluva long way, but a great way to see different parts of our wide, brown land. I’m presuming you did the inland route of course.
And you were probably wise getting out of the south before Xmas too…the Great Ocean Road is bumper-to-bumper at this time of year. I have to go to Lorne myself in a few days (my son and his partner live there) and it’s a drive I am NOT looking forward to. :rolleyes:
Re the doggie-bag thing, most restaurants will let you take food home, but some of the more uppity ones get a bit precious about it.
Vegemite? You have to be born here.
But thanks for coming, and I’m very glad you had a great time…when are ya coming back? 
Did you tip?
I’m going to guess they actually landed in Melbourne …
And restaurants here certainly do doggie bags.
Lovely innt? I got to Sydney and decided I was never leaving, so I didn’t. Glad you had fun.
Before our kiwi friends all get up in arms, I’m pretty sure that the reef creature in question is a moray wrasse.
You’ve covered a lot of ground.
Please to hear that you enjoyed it.
Plenty haven’t for years:
Nope. Maori Wrasse. Common name for a humphead wrasse.
I remember groaning when the legislation was first proposed, but like all things, people have a way of skirting the letter of the law. Here in Vic, most places will provide you with a take-away container, and as long as you remove the food from your plate into the plastic, it’s all good.
Of course none of the Asian cafes give two hoots and will pile your combination noodles and special fried rice happily into the box on your behalf!
Now, this is what you said you were going to do, but it really doesn’t make any sense to do it that way.
Yeah, I have to assume that too.
Whoops, landed in Brisbane, flew to Melbourne, and drove on from there. Blame it on the jet lag, that’s my excuse for everything this week.