Good Will Hunting. I just now Got that

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
21

Pearl jam: slang for ejaculate, which often has a glossy sheen resembling pearlessence.

Pearl necklace: shooting one’s ejaculate on the face/neck of one’s sexual partner.

I have s delayed comp story that’s much less sexually explicit. There was a joke in some old kiddie magazine i read as, well, a kiddie.

Patient: Doctor, I always get a sharp pain in my eye when I drink hot chocolate.
Doctor: Well, take the spoon out of the cup.

Took literally decades for it to occur to me that the spoon left in the cup was poking the patient in the eye.

22

I’ve got one of those stories from my brother. Well, sort of. I’m still not entirely sure about it. You know the age-old joke, “Why did the chicken cross the road?” It occurred to him one day that “the other side” said chicken was apparently trying to get to may have a more macabre interpretation than the literal other side of the road. You know, like death? By fast-moving vehicle. He explained it to me and it makes perfect sense, but I don’t know, maybe he was reading too much into it. Or maybe this is the more widely-accepted interpretation of the joke and we’re both just exceptionally thick.

23

bundykala, why did the chicken go to the séance?

… wait for it …

To get to the Other Side.

24

Well, if you are dense, then so am I. But you are right, that makes perfect sense.

25

Along the highway that I routinely drive to work, for several months there was a billboard that showed a large bowl of ice cream with the caption “Desert Dessert,” and the emblem of a local dairy.

I saw that and thought, “They’re telling people to avoid dessert? Nice health message, but kinda bad for business.”

It was literally months later that I realized both I and the dairy are in … you guessed it … a desert.

26

I must admit I still don’t quite get the chicken crossing the road joke. I think it’s a joke that’s not a joke but it took me years to even get that far.

I just heard “Smoke of a Distant Fire” and while I think I knew she was cheating, I was very literal-minded and pictured her having bloodshot eyes or something from having been near a fire with some other dude.

27

Quote:
Originally Posted by bundykala
…a more macabre interpretation than the literal other side of the road. You know, like death? By fast-moving vehicle…

Well gee…

That completely makes sense to me now…Holy crap, maybe I and everyone I know are completely clueless and have been for decades.

I gotta go sit down now.

28

Color me idiotic. I didn’t get the Good Will Hunting thing either, or Pearl Jam, or the chicken joke.

I used to be smart. I swear. :smack:

29

velvetjones

30

When I was about 9, I got a book full of elephant jokes. My parents still probably hate that book. But there was one joke I never got.

“How do you get down from an elephant?”
“You don’t, you get down from a duck.”

After pondering that for months (who would be short enough that being on a duck would be “up”?) I pretty much forgot about that joke.

Sometime in my 30s, the lightbulb went off. Down=duck feathers… DUH!

31

I’ve heard variants of the chicken joke for thirty years or so (Why did the duck cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken. And a million other unfunny variants), and of course all of them are contigent on knowing the original. Only today have I realised what the hell the joke in the original is. God I’m so clueless.

32

It took me until about three years ago to notice that Anaheim’s own No Doubt’s 1995 album “Tragic Kindom” was a play on Disneyland’s “Magic Kingdom.” Yes, I even heard the “Remain seated please” bit at the end of the title track.

33

Out here in Orange County we’ve been calling it (the park) “The Tragic Kingdom” for years, even before Ms. Stefani and the boys hit it big.

We also sometimes call it “The Crappiest Place on Earth”.

34

I still don’t get the Good Will Hunting reference

35

Me neither. I hate being dumber than Scylla.

36

An aside to add: My Uncle, who worked in Disneyland as a musician back in the day, said the musicians used to refer to it as “Mousewitz”, and “Duckau”, due to some sad work policy.

37

Isn’t Tragic Mountain just on the other side of town?

38

But the more important question is what does the porn version’s title mean?

Good Will Humping -
Does it mean Humping with Good Will to others?
Does it mean **Will **is Good at Humping?
Does it mean “Good! Will is Humping!” because the poor guy was having a dry spell? [sub]snerk dry humping[/sub]
Or does is mean that a guy named Will, who is a Good guy, is Humping?

Or does it mean all of the above!

39

Yup. Only we called it ‘The Sappiest Place On Earth’.

(And I used to work at Six Stabs Tragic Mountain. Only I think there were seven stabbings by the time I left.)

40

Me neither.