Actually, El Elvis Rojo, it seems that you didn’t hate to spoil it.
Thank you ever so much.
I have a secret message for El Elvis Rojo:
We have spoiler tags now.
Oh, I can.
Darth Maul.
R2-D2.
Hi Opal!
The design of the battle droids (hey, I liked the lanky look).
Tuskin Raiders taking potshots at pod racers.
The final Jedi duel.
Overall, while I wouldn’t say it was the best movie of all time, I also wouldn’t say it was completely without merit. I gave it a C+, myself.
Aw Jeez… After reading threads like these, I sometimes wonder if I should change my nickname. There is, however a semi-spoiler-laden review I read every day or so to keep my hopes up here
eh…
While TPM did suck the steam of a cantina servants piss, it did have some merit.
Darth Maul did look cool, and was a good villian, but could have been mesurably improved if he had done some real evil.
The jedi fight scenes were worthy of admission alone. I don’t know one kid I grew up with that hasn’t wished they had a light sabre at some stage. The double edged lightsabre was enough to make me mark out when I first saw it.
I thought he looked laughable. This is what he reminded me of.
Yeah, I know I mentioned it before; but Darth Maul was supposed to look “cool” and “evil” and “menacing”. I thought he looked comedic.
To add to the list of problems with TPM, here’s one that occurred to me a couple of weeks ago:
Qui-Gon makes two bets with Watto. The first is for the parts he needs: Qui-Gon bets that Anakin will win, putting their SR-71 Blackbird with the custom high-polish aluminum siding up against Watto’s parts. Fine and good.
The second is for Anakin’s freedom: Qui-Gon bets Anakin will win, and puts up Anakin’s racing pod (although Watto thinks it belongs to Qui-Gon) against possession of Anakin. Watto accepts this bet, but when Qui-Gon wants to include Anakin’s mother, Watto says, “No pod is worth two slaves.” But he takes the bet, so it seems that a pod IS worth one slave.
After the race, Anakin sells the pod racer and shows his mother, “look at all the money we got!” A good price, apparently, for a racer capable of beating Sebulba. But wait! Why can’t they use that money to purchase Anakin’s mother’s freedom? Anakin has been won, he’s free and clear. It’s been established that a pod is worth one slave, and they apparently got a good sale price for theirs. What the hell?
THANK YOU! That was absolutely my biggest gripe in the whole movie. The Force should not have a material basis, it should not be something physical that you can measure, it’s the Force dammit, mystical and unexplainable, not available to every Tom, Dick, and Gran who can scoop the damn things out of living cells – you’d think that technology would be available in their society now wouldn’t you?
Phew. That being ranted, I have to say that Ewan’s Obi Wan was outstanding but I thought that Liam mailed his Qui-gon portrayal in. He just walked through that role and put nothing into it. He’s a better actor than that. The movie over all rated just an OK in my personal ratings system - the great savior for the thing were the dueling scenes that showed some of the best choreography filmed since Gene Kelly hung up his shoes.
[And as to Star Wars, Yes HAN SHOT FIRST]
In one of the Star Wars episodes (perhaps part III), when a certain character is getting especially annoying, have Mr. T bust through a wall and start tossing Jar Jar Binks around like a rag doll, saying stuff like, “I pity the foo’ who turns to the dark side” and “That’s what you git, sucka.”
And I forgot to mention the bestest part of the whole thing: Why would Lucas take the time to try and de-mystify The Force, only to have Yoda anounce the Two Siths Only Rule? Why should there only be two Siths at a time? Is the galaxy really not large enough for there to be more evil, naughty dark Jedi? THe whole thing is obviously a way to explain why, in ROTJ the Emperor needs Luke to wack Vader and take his place, but it makes no sense in the series.
I picture a whole series of potential evil jedi, waiting in line for the announcement the Darth Blech finally ate it, now serving #435.
Ok, I have to ask, since this has been seriously bugging me.
What the hell is all this Sith crap, anyway? Where did that come from? Perhaps my memory is slipping, but for the past few years, I keep hearing Vader called “Dark Lord of Sith” which sounds like some lispy BDSM pseudonym. Is this actually in the movies, or did it just get invented somewhere while I wasn’t looking?
Thanks.
Tenebras
Finagle, I just thought it was shit. Bad, boring, shit. No redeeming qualities, and the child actor was just u-n-s-p-e-a-k-a-b-l-e.
I mentioned this in another thread, but what y’all have been saying inspired me. (BTW, SPOOFE, your analysis was spot-on!) Anakin was a crummy role no matter who was playing it, but it encompassed Jake Lloyd’s entire range. Haley Joel Osment, who auditioned but didn’t even get a callback, simply would not have done. Imagine the pod race:
“[awed whisper] It’s working!” [stares transfixed, gets sideswiped, and ends up in a twisted pile of metal on the floor of the canyon.]
Or saying goodbye to his mom:
“Will I see you again?”
“What does your heart tell you?”
“My heart tells me…you will always be in my heart [sniffle, gulp, perfect tear starts creeping downwards]…Oh, mommy, I’m going to be a Jedi and I am going to make you so proud and I’ll buy your freedom and—”
[Obi-Wan yanks Anakin up and away]“Put a sock in it; let’s get going!”
Or meeting Amidala:
“You’re so beautiful I’m just going to stare at you until you get creeped out and you call your goons to squash me and I won’t have to be in the sequel!”
The term ‘Sith Lord’ was originally used in the novelization of A New Hope (ghostwritten by Alan Dean Foster).
Aha… That explains everything. Thanks. 
Tenebras
Actually, that’s exactly how it is. 4,000 years ago (give or take a few decades), there were lots and lots of Sith. They were big, powerful, and tough-ass mofos. Unfortunately, what destroyed them was infighting… the Sith turned on each other in a mad lust for power. After that, the surviving Sith decided that, to prevent another such catastrophe, he should only have one apprentice, and they should remain hidden.
Which is weird… it took them 4,000 years to get their revenge? I mean, I know it’s a dish best served cold, but who eats their food at Absolute Zero?
Well why not? I mean, if the Date and Satsuma clans could bide their time against Tokugawa for a few hundred years here on Earth, why shouldn’t some Dark Side dudes be even more patient?