“You’re pretty funny for a guy with nine fingers.”
“When a woman gets an orchid, she feels like she’s floating on a cloud of infinite possibility.”
The fact that Chris Noth could say that with a straight face (in The Perfect Man) was earthshattering. And this made it into a great line, even though it’s possibly the worst line ever written in one of the worst ever films.
I read it (more a novella, really), and it’s a nice tight piece of writing. But the movie is glorious.
Basic Instinct:
“You weren’t making love to me.”
“Who was I making love to, then?”
“You weren’t making love.”
Also I got the phrase “jack off on the damn computer” from that movie.
“At least I got to have ya!” dies
- Starship Troopers
The sequel had this brilliant exchange between a girl and her boyfriend turned zombie…
Zombie: Wendy, let me eat your brains
Wendy: I don’t know, I’m scared
Zombie: Come on Wendy, you know I love you
Wendy: Oh, ok
And the oft used on the SDMB
From Star Trek V
McCoy: What does God need with a starship?
Honey, I Blew Up the Kids has one moment of dialog-y brilliance. The basic plot is that Rick Moranis’s toddler stumbled into his expando-ray, and is now 100 feet tall, stomping through the countryside, confused and alone. They can shrink him if they can pacify him and get him to their shrink ray, but he’s a huge angry toddler. So their (surprisingly sensible) plan is to use the expando-ray on his mother, so she’ll be to scale, then she’ll go grab him, hug him, mother him, whatever, and bring him back to the shrink ray.
So they expand her, send her out to get him, and a bystander says…
Look at the SIZE of that mother!
Weekend at Bernie’s had some funny lines–my favorite:
Dirty Old Man to Cute Female Party Goer: “That’s a nice shirt, I bet it would look great crumpled up at the foot of my bed in the morning…”
Effeminate Male Eavsedropping Party Goer: “Polyester doesn’t crumple!!!”
From The Happening (1967):
Robert Walker: “The zoo isn’t open yet”
Faye Dunaway: “The…zoo…is…never…open!”
Even better-
“There’s ALWAYS time for lubricant!”
or how 'bout
“garter belt, at a day function?” shakes head.
I think evolution is a hoot
We could honorarily nominate a lot of the script from Zero Hour!, some of which was used verbatim for comedy effect in Airplane!
I’ve never seen Johnny Guitar - I’ve heard it’s bad - but there’s something I love about the line “I am a stranger here myself.”
Indeed, you have to be kidding to call one of the greatest movies ever made a bad movie.
from Night at the Museum
Ben Stiller, after beginning to deal with the reality that all things in the museum come to life at night, gets fire-extinguisher foam thrown on his face by Neanderthalls. He simply says, “Why?” It’s not so much the line as the delivery. As if to say, “The entire world has gone nuts. Why did it just have to go more nuts?”
And, of course, almost immediately after, from Robin Williams, seeing Stiller getting into a slap-fight with a capucin monkey:
“Why are you slapping the monkey?”
And there’s the question of the ice cream flavor- “I don’t care, it’s for my ass.”