And it speaks well of you that you now feel so badly.
Now, you can’t really make up for it, so, turn with it, make it something positive. Go out and do something nice for a complete stranger. Or for someone you love. Or for someone you dislike.
Again, it won’t make up, but it will add to the energy that’s “out there.” And doing good will help you feel well.
As I read the OP, lieu got out of HIS car and went over to the guy for tailgating, flashing his brights, and honking. While annoying, this behavior is hardly deserving of a beating. Never mind the fact that it is against the law to take punishment into your own hands. It was an unenlightened and barbaric response to a situation which was NOT violent until the OP decided to make it so. Sadly, there are times when violence is the only recourse one has. This was not one of those times.
Yeah, and maybe if more people got shot on the train at 9:00am in the morning, it wouldn’t be so damn crowded. But that doesn’t make it OK for me to shoot people on my way to work. Violence is illegal and immoral in most situations. Definately here. The idea that people will stop being rude if we start beating more people up, is one of the stupidest things I’ve heard today so far. And I’ve been on Richard Hoagland’s website this morning, so that’s saying alot.
And flipping someone off is not equal to assaulting them. The only law the other driver broke was traffic laws, which are punishable by fines. I am aware of no court in the US that allows anyone to beat up anyone else, even for a felony. This is good. People are irrational. That’s why we have courts.
DaLovin’ Dj
I note with optimism that Esprix and DalovinDJ are on the same side in this discussion. If these two can agree on an issue, maybe we can achieve peace in the Middle East!
Gobear: I know. I remember feeling like that the first time pldennison agreed with me. It’s a cool feeling, isn’t it?
Yes it is. I know someone who was charged with assaulting a peace officer when he flipped off a cop.
’lovin’ - you are of course right. Absolutely right. No argument. As indeed, I noted waaaay up there in the first reply to this thread.
But as someone who’s endured these fuckwits who think they own the road, there’s still a small part of me who is glad… REALLY glad… that lieu did it.
Guess I’m not quite as civilized as I’d like to think I am.
pan
*Originally posted by dalovindj *
I think that’s the point.
An average commuter was confronted with an amorous bumper, blinding brights, and a blaring horn. When I tell him to back the fuck off, he verbally assaults me and perches a stinkin’ condor under my nose. He outweighed me by 30 pounds and thought he could bully me. He thought wrong.
I’m not anxious for it to happen again and will likely find some way to just let the next bastard gain the car length he covets so bad but this ass monkey had to pay for his transgression.
I still don’t feel bad that his cheek caught it like a well-oiled mitt. I’m just sorry that an unnecessary conflict like this ever had to come up.
I want to make the best of a work day and then return safely to those I love. This dipshit put me in a foul mood for, oh, 7 minutes or so.
Yes jar, it stayed in my left because his right was busy with the pavement.
And Demise, it just took one.
Yondan, funny you should mention it but that’s been my attitude on the road ever since last Friday’s mudder trucker. I’ve been going out of my way to give everyone their space and change lanes as they need.
The road is no place for people to get pissy but dammit, I’m not part of the pavement.
And DJ, I just read the rest of your post.
I did exit my car on the onramp and surrounded by stalled commuters to do anything other that tell this fucker to chill.
When he tells me to go fuck myself and sticks an onerous finger in my face then yes, it is assault.
Crap.
Obviously, I didn’t exit…
Brake taps weren’t getting this guy to let up and I wouldn’t have gotton out except we were already stopped because of backed up traffic.
There was no way for this moron to hurry anywhere.
Pity people don’t do more of it. I’m serious, the reason people get away with driving like morons is that they know there’s nothing anyone can do. And they will continue to do so.
Is stooping to that level the answer? probably not. Until someone comes along with a better one, that may have to do.
My solution has always been to allow everyone to carry paintball guns. When someone messes with you, hit him with a pink paintball. A cop sees a car with twenty paintball hits, pulls him over, tickets him.
Will people who don’t deserve it get hit? sure. Will people who do deserve it finally get what’s coming to them? Yes, unless they spend every spare moment washing.
Just a suggestion. YMMV.
b.
What if the paintballer can’t shoot worth a shit, hits the windshield of the speeding car, and the car rams a VW, killing 3 innocent kids…nahhh, but lieu, you did break Stripes rule #1. “Never hit a man in anger, unless you’re sure you can get away with it.” He coulda been packin’ heat.
Hope springs eternal - keep springin’, babe.
Esprix
I don’t want to seem like I’m accusing lieu of being a bad person. I don’t really know him too well. I do have empathy here. I can understand the rage. I hate it when people act like dicks. I’ve wanted to hit a few people because they were dicks. I’ve gone ahead and hit a few. I’ve felt satisfaction when seeing a jerk get hit, and I even got a little satisfaction from the OP smacking that loser. Still . . .
These emotions, while they cannot be denied to exist, are nothing to brag about. In fact, they should be recognized as faults, and as decent people, we should make active efforts to correct our faults and resist animal urges. I, unfortunately, have been in some pretty violent situations in the past. Some of them justifiable, and some not so easily rationalized. They definately changed my life, and I now work very hard to control my instincts so that rational thought can be my guide and not blind anger.
I used to get into a lot of trouble. I’ve chilled out alot these days, and it is no accident. I have seen violence and have decided it is ugly. I want no part of any of it, and I try to avoid it at all costs. When calm, I recognise that physically harming someone is serious. Very. It is an option that should be used sparingly at best. Then I get mad, and I fight with myself to remain civil. Used to be hard, and now it comes a little easier.
Who gets to decide who has a beating coming and who doesn’t? It’s too much power to let each individual decide. So don’t. If you feel angry, if possible, ignore it. If you can’t then leave. If you can’t leave, call the police. If you have no access to police and no way to exit the situation, only then should violence be considered.
Throwing a punch to teach someone some manners is a contradiction. It’s childish behavior and we should all be above it after all this time. IMHO.
I am curious about the law on giving someone the bird. I think cops are special cases. You have to treat them with more respect then a non-officer. If one citizen flips off another that is assault??? Cite?
DaLovin’ Dj
NJ State Statute 2C:12-1 par a sub 3:
idiot drivers actions combined with physical size could be interpreted as assault.
also in the same statute
so it seems neither party would be entitled to a jury, and likely the case would be thrown out or both would be convicted.
Well, here is the pertinent (Texas) law:
So I’m guessing that the State of Texas considers flipping the bird to fall under section (a)(2). I absolutely don’t agree that any situation where the bird has been flipped should be considered assault, but I could easily see in lieu’s case that it would be.
BTW, the guy that I know that charged with assault on a peace officer was sitting in his car and flipped off a cop sitting in his police car. I can’t see how that could ever be considered assault, since there would be nothing “imminent” about it, but it was.
While driving to an airshow last August, I accidentally cut another driver off when I changed lanes on the freeway (forgot to shoulder-check). He voiced his displeasure by passing and then cutting close in front of me, making me brake to avoid hitting him. He stayed ahead of me and tapped his brakes a few times to reinforce the lesson, and then sped off. “Asshole,” I thought, “he’s gonna get someone killed.” But I admitted to myself that I should have been watching where I was going.
Coincidentally, when I arrived at my destination, he’d parked not twenty feet away and was just getting out of his car. I walked over and apologised, figuring it was the right thing to do. I guessed he’d probably yell at me and I’d take it like a man. Mr Big Tough Driver didn’t say a word, and didn’t even look me in the eye. The coward.
It felt good to apologise for cutting him off, though, even if he was a dick.
IANAL but I was under the impression that battery required actual physical contact.
If someone like this permits a self defense reaction then I need to clarify with an attourney under CA law. If flipping me off at close range allows me to strike back physically my security job is gonna get fun.
In the spirit of Kamandi’s post I feel compelled to tell this one, courtesy of Momma Dooku.
We’re Christmas shopping one year at the Mall, when my mom puts on her blinker, clearly waiting for a car to back out and drive off. As that car is backing out, a guy in another car coming the other way takes advantage of the car backing out in our way, and takes the spot. There’s no doubt that he saw us patiently waiting for it and took it anyway. As luck would have it, another spot opened up closer to the door, and my mom got out and rushed as fast as she could with me in tow so she could wait for him at the door to the store. Sure enough, we beat him there, and as he’s walking up to us, standing there waiting for him, I could see him steeling himself up for whatever confrontation was going to happen. Instead, my mom opened the door for him, and said “Merry Christmas, sir, and God Bless You.” I’ll never forget the look of shame and humility on his face.
As for the OP, I have never let my road rage escalate to that level, but I frequently catch myself so consumed with anger while driving that I can’t hardly believe it when I’m thinking about it later. I wish I knew more about what causes me to get like that, since I’m the furthest thing from an angry person when I’m not behind the wheel. Road Rage is scary shit.
Lord knows I’ve been pissed off in traffic before, but I just can’t accept that hitting a guy for flipping you off is appropriate.
And even if we assume that flipping lieu the bird is assault, it doesn’t justify the battery. If lieu felt threatened he could have simply walked away from the guy. You’re only allowed to defend yourself when you really have to. I find it hard to believe that lieu was in imminent danger. He was standing next to a seated driver wearing his seatbelt (I assume). If the bird was menacing, he could just get back into his car and lock the door.
I understand the anger lieu felt, but the attempted legal justifications are pretty thin.
I’m sorry I gave that impression, Zoff.
He was not in his car. There’s no way I could feel threatened by a seated aviarist, nor could I have judged him bigger than I, nor would I have responded in such a manner.
His truck was still on my bumper’s ass (what caused the conflict in the first place) and he’d gotton out and walked up to me. I too had taken a couple of steps toward him and the incident happed around my left rear quarterpanel.
While I do appreciate your sentiment that I could propel him out of both his restraint and his vehicle and onto the same pavement as was mentioned above, I can assure you I’d not likely accept a challence from anyone were the playing field not to be at the very least equal.
Yes, Dooku, road rage is scary shit and it makes me physically nauseous to ponder later. I find myself going to greater and greater lengths to avoid it and that’s one reason it pisses me off so much when I find myself a part of it.
Believe me, I’m disappointed in myself that this happened. It bothers me a lot more than I would have guessed it would have. But I also think it kinda sucks that the same considerations we’ve come to expect in person have to be abandoned on the road because an anonymous jerk is pretty sure he’s the one who owns it.