Grintianity: A new religion?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Here is the photo of the most-high Rupert Grint that started this spiritual journey.

At my work at a library, I frequently see the print-outs from the internet that people have failed to pick-up. Usually, they are errors, duplicates, or just nothing much at all, but yesterday I found something important. In fact, if they information is accurate, we may have a new spiritual system. For now, though it is in its early stages, I’m calling it Grintianity, which focuses on the most-high(deity?) Rupert Grint. For those of you not familiar, Rupert Grint, when not doing his most-high duties, plays Ron Weasely in the Harry Potter movies.

On the print-out in question, there is a photo of Rupert Grint(link at top of post) and a conversation from some of his “devotees”. Apparantly, there was a chat-room and the conversation between his “devotees” reveals much about Grintianity.

Let’s look together, with analyzation by me.

**tinkerbell:
Aww…he has such a young looking face in this photo, a little like some of his photos from the first movie.

ireallydunno:
i want to have him for dinner!!! yum! thats one sexy photo.

tinkerbell:
okay, happy eating then

ireallydunno:
o i will!.. **

Hmmm…well this is a most interesting start. Perhaps Grintianity holds that we must actually eat part of Rupert Grint to be close to him. Then again, it may be more like a Baptist belief in that we must eat something else and by doing so, we fully commemorate Rupert Grint’s gift to us all. What His gift is and what we must eat is unknown. More meditation on this principle is necessary.

Let’s continue.

**CodeRedhead:
wow, what a picture! sure wish i was that tree. then id smack his sexy tush w/ my branch!! **

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Can followers of Grintianity actually become plants and trees? If so, is it only so we can “smack his sexy tush” or is this something we can do for other purposes? And by “smacking his sexy tush”, are we also drawing closer to the most-high Grint himself.

What if we both eat Rupert Grint and smack his sexy tush at the same time? Is this the key to true enlightenment in Grintianity?

Let’s continue.

**rupertsgirl
now this is the one, this is it!!..the photo i’ll put in my desktop, so Rupert will be watching over me… and cherry,…u’re right, look at those forearms, he is muscular!.. …he’s just perfect…sigh…hey his eyes look kinda brown here…but they’re green…

MissWicked
he is so damn stunning! makes me sick! and, well, other things!!!

rupertsgirl
Hi MissWicked!..hey why does it make u sick eh?..and i just won’t ask about the other things…

MissWicked
makes me sick cuz he’s so perfect and he would probably neve want me!! oh, and your right not to ask about the “other” things!!! trying to keep it PG!!! **

We learn a few things here that are quite relevant. Apparantly, most-high Rupert “watches over” us during our lives. He is most definatly a personal devine being, one who genuinely cares about us. MissWicked tells us that he makes her sick, much like the Judeo-Christian God. Rupert also makes MissWicked feel “other things”. Unfortunately, we are not told what these “other things” are, though I assume they are spiritual in nature.

But why does the most-high Rupert Grint make us feel sick? Well, MissWicked informs us that it is for two reasons. First, he is perfect. Secondly, he would never want Miss Wicked Hmmm…how can the most-high Rupert Grint look over us and not want us at the same time? And what is he looking over us for?

Perhaps the next section shall reveal more:

**RupertRocksMySocks
it DOES look like hes watching you… its like hes going “I KNOW WHAT YOUVE BEEN UP TO YOUNG LADY!!!” u know?? or it might just be me

weird_lov3
lol yeah… its like… i have rupert all over my walls u carnt see my wall… and when i change i think hes looking at me, ahh ruperts a pervert!

RupertRocksMySocks
lol… thats EXACTLY how i feel when i put posters n junk on my walls!

weird_lov3
omg yeahh!!! but i wouldent mind watching rupert changing… hehe

RupertRocksMySocks
lol… i hear ya buddy!! its like… how yu doin?? ((wink wink nudge nudge)) **

Well, the most-high Rupert Grint most definately is watching us. Now, RupertRocksMySocks seems to feel that he is angry with us, as if he knows what we have “been up to”. Then again, weird_lov3 seems to feel that our most-high Rupert Grint is just a perv. who likes to watch teenage girls undress.

Either way, it has great implications into Grintianity. Can a “perfect” Rupert also be a perverted Rupert? Perhaps the two are not mutually exclusive.

Weird-lov3 also tells us she wouldn’t mind watching the most-high changing. So perhaps there is sexual connection between the most-high and ourselves? Interesting, to say the least.

Let us continue further:

**tinkerbell
Well, this is a new year, so lets all try to be nice to each other, well those that deserve it! It’s suppose to be a fun site so lets not bash each other because were all suppose to like and love Rupert!

ireallydunno
yeah good. but what does she think. (CRH) so i can copy anyone i want to. even rupert!!! (but i wont) (dont worry). lets have a wonderful new start my friends (i hope) good day!!

tinkerbell
Yeah, that was a bit brutal there! Peace and Love is what we should have here, that is what Rupert would Love from all of us!**

This, at last, does reveal a general moral mentality that the most-high Rupert Grint has for us. First, we should “like and love” Rupert. Secondly, as tinkerbell reveals, we should act in accordance to peace and love, for this is what Rupert Grint would want from us.

Lastly, and perhaps most interestingly, we get one final insight into Grintianity from tinkerbell

**tinkerbell
Thanx there iLuVrUpErT! We should drown ourselves in the Love for Rupert.
**

Drown ourselves? Is this the “baptism” of Grintianity?

Very confusing, but we can draw a few clear principles of Grintianity from all this mess.

  1. Rupert Grint is perfect.

  2. Rupert Grint enjoys watching teenage girls undress.

    a. Rupert Grint does this through posters that work something like close-circuit television for him.
    b. Rupert can, of course, be a pervert and perfect at the same time.

  3. We may be able to become trees to “smack the sexy tush” of Rupert.

  4. We may be able to eat Rupert Grint, either literally or spiritually.

  5. Rupert Grint makes us sick and “other things”. No word on the “other things”.

  6. Rupert Grint knows what “we’ve been up to”(perhaps Rupert Grint=Father Christmas?)

  7. Rupert Grint doesn’t want MissWicked(perhaps MissWicked = Satan?).

  8. We should like and love one another.

  9. We should “drown ourselves” in Rupert Grint’s love.

Well, this may be the start of a new religion.

May the most-high Rupert Grint be with you.

:slight_smile:

2

Thank you, Mahaloth. I think this will keep me giggling for a week. Mr. Frail told me just the other day that he didn’t think today’s teenaged girls could get all worked up over a guy named Rupert. :slight_smile:

3

That’s hilarious, and also subject to all sorts of interpretation (aside from your quite entertaining one). I know of many ladies who would be fervent adherents of Grintianity.

That’s the key to something, but I’m not sure I’d call it enlightenment.

4

I offically think this is the longest thread I’ve ever written, by the way.

5

I don’t know. I’ve found myself quite enlightened while simultaneously performing both of the aforementioned activities on certain someones. I’m not into Grint, though…I’m holding out for Ianevskiism…

6

With all due PC respect to Grintians, I’ve never thought of the guy as cute. He’s a great comic actor, and will probably survive the childhood curse into a productive adulthood, but he’s just too pale and lanky and bug-eyed. Radcliffe, if he ever gets those hideous eyebrows tamed, will definitely be the heartthrob (maybe Tom Felton, too).

7

Blasphemy! :wink:

I admit that he’s not exactly good-looking, but I find him strangely intriguing all the same.

8

People are actually attracted to this boy? I hate to be so shallow, but I find his homeliness positively distracting in all of those movies. I know it’s mean to say, but he is just absolutely ugly.

9

One thing that has not been discussed, and I may be dipping into herresey here (or at the very least, splinter-factioning), but … ‘Changing’. It doesn’t say chaning clothes. Is there not the possibility that having the big G in our presence -changes- us? That we become somehow different? For many people, such a great spiritual change can be uncomfortable- we don’t want people to watch. If we think our savior is changing as well, however, it brings him closer to our own experience, and, through that, closer to us!
(I’m ashamed for even writing that. Although it does give an interresting insight into how ‘religious’ texts, whose authors you don’t know, can be interpreted in many an odd way…)

10

Of course! Rupert isn’t really perverted. He just likes to watch us while we are “changing” or becoming more like him.

I shall meditate on this.