Grrahhh! Stupid Vice City Ambulance. Arrgghh!

Cafe Society
21

Okey-Dokey – I hate you.

Hate you, hate you, hate you.

I will offer my opinion on your success, but first a disclaimer: I am sure that you are well and truly a good and noble person, a possesor of “mad skillz” in piloting the aforementioned Ambulance, or as I prefer to call it, the Suicidal Patient Magnet and Anger Management Test Vehicle. So my analysis of your experience should in no way be construed as a personal affront. That said:

YOU GOT LUCKY, YOU EVIL BASTARD!

Really.

The fact that you (and Ivar as well, though it took him two tries) could get through all the levels – that’s picking up and dropping off 78 patients in one sitting, for those scoring at home – without experiencing just one mishap on your first try is not natural. NOT NATURAL. It is, in fact, EVIL, SICK, and WRONG.

That in all 78 pickups you didn’t have a cop stop you, or have a patient get hit by another car, or shot, or run in front of you for the ol’ front grille makeover, means that you must have hit a zone of extreme and unusual Vice City AI cooperation. You have been blessed by the gods of fortune.

Appreciate the gift. Be thankful. Be not proud, for pride goeth before a fall. Do not speak of your victory as a trivial thing, for the gods will smite ye for it in all their righteousness.

As for me, I have not returned to the evil task in a while. I will at some point I am sure. But I have decided to respect the wishes of the gods of forutne in my case, and accept that it is not my time yet.

In the meantime, I have finally found my 80th package so I have secured the Sea Sparrow with attatched chain gun at my mansion. The innocent citizens of vice city have felt my wrath for several nights in a row now.

Especially the Ambulances. Oh yes. And the best part is – when you blow up one ambulance, another soon arrives to render help, not knowing that their mission of mercy shall be their death knell.

Tonight I think I will take my Rhino out of the garage and go vist the local hostpitals…

22

OK, to make you feel better, it took me about 15 tries in GTA3. But I remembered what I learned then, and applied it to the new situation.

Do the mission on the south end of Ocean Beach. Figure out the shortcuts. Remember where the access points are for the beach. And don’t run over any cops. Pick up patients in groups close to each other. Drive slowly, use the e-brake to get around tight corners. As soon as they open the door to get in, start driving, they’ll pull themselves in.

And this is the best hint I can give you. Stop farther away from the patients, make them run to you. They will run to you when you get close enough, and then you won’t run them over!

23

Nope, nope, nope, and nope.

:smiley:

Oh, and if you think the Sea Sparrow if fun, wait until you get the Apache…er…Hunter helicopter. It has the minigun AND two nose mounted rocket launchers. Loads of fun.

One fun thing to do in an armed helicopter is to find a nice, big, open, heavily-populated area, like the beach, then hover just off the ground, and open fire while spinning in circles. I was amazed at how fast my wanted level went up. Then you can blow up the police helicopters with your rocket launchers. Whee!

24

Have you managed to shoot down the banner-carrying plane yet? It’s possible with the Hunter’s rockets.

25

keen! can you take out the blimp too? or those damn sharks and dolphins?
The attack chopper is da bomb. strafing city streets as cop cars go whizzing past only to meet flaming death is what makes life worth living.