Good god, no!
This, however, I can get behind.
Considering the absolute storytelling mess that was Hellboy 2, I’m actually pretty glad. I don’t remember ever being that disappointed with a film.
I’d be perfectly fine with no Hobbit movie at all. It’s a very endearing reading experience - IMHO, it would be wasted on the Hollywood audience.
Darn. I really liked the idea of Del Toro directing this one.
I wonder if Oliver Stone is available. We could finally discover who is *really *in charge in Midddle Earth.
The finger was bitten off back and to the left.
And Aragorn announced the fall of Barad-dur an hour before it actually happened.
Stone would just make up some paranoid crap about an authoritarian all-seeing Eye directing a vast army of magical forces against the little guys.
I hope they get David Mamet to write and direct.
Barrels out of Bond I guess. You leave the audience wondering if any of the dwarves will make it and you have Bilbo effectively on his own racing off to adventure which nicely frames his solitary placid smoking at the opening.
Problem is - no Dragon in movie #1. People may feel ripped off since I’m convinced they’ll play up Smaug in the trailers/ads.
“Good morning!” said Bilbo, and he meant it. The sun was shining, and the grass was very green. But Gandalf looked at him from under long bushy eyebrows that stuck out further than the brim of his shady hat. “What do you mean?” he said. “Do you wish me a good morning, or mean that it is a good morning whether I want not; or that you feel good this morning; or that it is morning to be good on?”
“Go fuck yourself,” said Bilbo.*
I see Ken Burns… all that horrid Tolkien “music” underscoring the narration by Bilbo as he sits around a fire, reminiscing. The entire movie would be one huge flashback, with the myriad different editions’ illustrations providing the pan and scan…
Could it be done in sepia, too? 
They can easily interlace the two halves of the story; show the dragon terrorizing Laketown, etc., in parallel with the Dwarves and their quest. Tolkien never seemed to do this, but Jackson certainly did (I’m thinking of the book vs. movie of The Two Towers).
I agree with Grey. There are definitely two climaxes to the book, and Bilbo’s escape from Mirkwood is one of them, conveniently placed about halfway through.
There’s plenty of Smaugportunity (hee!) in the early part of the story, when the Dwarfs are telling Bilbo the story of their fathers and the fall of the mountain.
Gee, thanks for nothing, Polycarp. I had almost managed to scrub that name from out of my memory.
LOL. I love it! 
Here’s Entertainment Weekly on Del Toro’s departure. Jackson’s flack says he will not be directing: http://www.cnn.com/2010/SHOWBIZ/Movies/06/01/peter.jackson.hobbit.ew/index.html?hpt=T3
Oh you could but really Smaug is THE movie visual and the key reveal. No one knows if the dragon is there, he almost never comes out. Maybe he’s dead? Maybe he’s perched on the mountain top watching the dwarves. He’s the tension and weight once they get to the lonely mountain.
And a very cool reveal as Bilbo inches down the tunnel and spies Smaug the Great.
Showing him in any real detail could be done early, you’re right about that. I’m just not sure that it would be wise. My vast lack of movie awards attests to my authoritative tone of course. 
Maybe it can be a flashback in the form of Gandalf or The Dwarves telling Bilbo a little bit about Smaug’s history.
Although, anything that isn’t 100% by the book is going to piss off all the fan boys.
Kevin Smith could direct.
Gandalf enters
Gandalf: What up bitches? Snoochie boochies!
Bilbo: I’m not even supposed to BE here today.
It’s a shame, really. Gary Coleman would have been *perfect *in this movie!
Entertainment Weekly gives the tongue-in-cheek pros and cons of 15 other possible directors: http://www.ew.com/ew/gallery/0,,20390376,00.html