One year, I bought a white sweatsuit from Salvation Army, covered my hair with a handkerchief, and got a friend to spatter tempera paint all over me. I was a painting by Jackson Pollock.
At a party this weekend, I went as the Queen of Hearts. I wore a crown. a foofy red skirt, and a sandwich board decorated like a playing card. I also made heart-shaped jam cookies for the party. (Actual tarts are beyond me.)
My friend’s boyfriend went out a few years ago as Wilson from Home Improvement. He fashioned himself a mini fence that hung around his neck and covered the bottom half of his face. Add a plaid shirt and a <what the heck are those hats called anyway?>hat, and he was good to go. Still my favourite costurme I’ve seen yet. The best part was that the inside part of the ‘fence’ had a little ledge where he could hold his drink.
The same night, we saw someone dressed as Richard Simmons - super short, shiny slitted shorts, big red afro and a sweatband on his head. It was pretty funny.
My tackiest costume won me a prize:
Gold metallic fabric made into a skirt, country music t-shirt dazzled up with glitter paint, cowboy boots, very large hair, lots of makeup, a blacked out tooth, and a sash that read Homecoming Queen of Trailer Trash High. Actually, I would have fit in perfectly at any lounge in the tiny Texas town where I grew up, but the city slickers at the party thought it was right funny.
I’ve told my SO that he may dress me for Halloween this year. I’m a little nervous about what he’s dreaming up!
Pilgrims…in bondage.
It was October of 1998 and I was trying to dye my hair red. It, uh … turned pink. Not just slightly pink; I’m talking bright pink. It wasn’t a huge deal; I actually thought it was cool. It did, however, hinder my Halloween plans. (I can’t recall what my original costume idea was.) That was, until…
…I bought a yellow shirt.
…and then yellow pants
…and polished my black combat boots
…and painted my face silver
…and wrote a big number 2 on the aforementioned yellow shirt
I was a pencil. An upside-down pencil, but a pencil nonetheless.
And the only person who got more compliments/laughs about his costume at the party was the pregnant man.
Damn pregnant man.
-Dirty