I can’t pretend to be dumb, since I have a glass face… but I have spent most of my life shutting up. Apparently, that’s “proper socialization”.
In several job applications my MS wasn’t listed. I did list “3 years as a college TA”, but in Spain that’s not linked to being a graduate student, at least not as much as in the US. There’s several jobs that I know for sure I’d never have gotten them if my boss had known I had more of a degree than (s)he did.
Whenever the guy at Advance asks if I know how to put them on, I say ‘No.’
Then the guy at Advance puts on the wiper blades for me and I give him a tip.
This doesn’t really count as pretending to be stupid, but it’s related: When I was a newspaper reporter (in Florida) I sometimes would affect a slight Southern drawl to get on the good side of a potential source. It’s not my habitual mode of speech (sometimes I get mistaken for a Brit, don’t ask me why – I’ve only ever been to Britain once) but I can put it on easily; I grew up hearing my aunts and uncles talk that way.
I tend to do this alot, almost always when it comes to computers.
I’ve been fixing that damned things for years. I am pretty damend good at it. The problem is most people aren’t. So they have problems and the moment they find out you know something about computers they want you to diagnose their computer problem and fix it. This can eat up a large amount of time. So, when they find out I work at a computer company and it appears that they are about to start in with the ‘Well, my computer gets this error’ bit I tell them I work in the billing department. That usually shuts them up. If it doesn’t, which happens about half the time, I play dumb until they stop asking questions.
At one point I tried telling people that I charge an enormous amount of money per hour to fix computer problems. That didn’t work, as people would just try and get me to do it for free.
Slee
Always, when dealing with sales reps. If you act like you never heard of QRT-PCR (or whatever) before, you get the 30-second canned spiel and some brochures. If you seem like a power user, they’ll spend the rest of the afternoon trying to get you to switch to their SuperDuper MegaImproved Proprietary Product™. Which can be amusing, since a lot of the sales reps have only undergrad-level knowledge of biology and make some hysterical bloopers.
JRB
Usually I play dumb regarding my car or my bicycle. I just let the guy do it for me for free. The other day I patiently listened to a guy explain to me step by step how to use a presta valve. I used to be a bicycle mechanic. But I just stood there and blinked while he fixed my bike for me. 
Also, I’ve found it useful to play dumb when you’re around an insufferable know-it-all who won’t give up. Just let them run with their delusions. It’s not worth the effort.
This was so long ago…I’ll have to think about it and get back to you if I can think of any interesting anecdotes. Basically, though, it was just my not advancing an opinion on anything and not letting the guy know, for example, that rather than being impressed with his translating the Spanish name of the restaurant we were in, I actually had a degree in Spanish and that he was mistranslating it.
Is being smart just being able to make some amazing calculation in your head, or being able to describe the biological functions of at least 50 diffrent types of animals? If so, I’m not to sure what being Intelligent means. Of course, knowing what I previously mentioned above IS an aspect of intelligence, but there is so much more to intelligence than calculating numbers and remembering the names of objects and things.
And of course, some people are naturally going to be better than other people at certain things. Is it fair to label a person “stupid” for not being good at THAT particular thing?
I was an insufferable know-it-all in school, and to some extent, I still am. I wish I had known back then that I was being a pain and a bit intimidating, particularly to guys. If I only knew then what Jane Austen knew long before:
“She was heartily ashamed of her ignorance. A misplaced shame. Where people wish to attach, they should always be ignorant. To come with a well-informed mind is to come with an inability of administering to the vanity of others, which a sensible person would always wish to avoid. A woman especially, if she have the misfortune of knowing anything, should conceal it as well as she can.”
Yes, when I was in high school, my female classmates used to become giggling idiots around boys they liked. I was a tomboy so it didn’t effect me until a few years later when I felt like being a little more girly. The idea of girliness that I had was that you were supposed to be all giggly and act dumb so I did. People used to give me free stuff all the time and did all sorts of things for me. It was kind of scary how much power I had over certain individuals. I felt bad about it and haven’t done it for the past 5 years.
I don’t have to pretend…I’m short.
Well…I don’t have to pretend to be stupid, just to get that one out of the way. While not stupid I’m often bemused, confused, inattentive, or just plain lost.
But I have claimed ignorance of certain things, most notably office politics. Example: the day after I got promoted I faced my (new) boss in an office ping-pong tournament that, as far as I could tell, nobody was taking particularly seriously. I beat him. Not by a lot, but by enough. He assumed this avuncular attitude and told me that, seriously, I should not have beaten him, and that now I’d just better damn well win–and he did seem to be serious.
Okay, on one hand I did think about it–hmm, my boss, maybe I should let him win? But when I talked to him I did the whole innocent thing.
When I’m around stubborn creationists, I usually just to be ignorant of the debate, since it’s easier to hear them say “hah, then I’m right!” than to have an argument that I know won’t have any resolution.
Once to annoy a telemarketer. I can’t even remember what they were selling, but I just put on this phony voice and played this big “I’m so stupid act.” My sister was in the background practically having hysterics.
Ah, yes. Socratic irony.
And I’m tall (which apparently in wimmin=thick as a ditch)
Many years ago I was staying over at my brother and sister-in-law’s and we [me and SIL] were playing Trivial Pursuit. She was a sore looser and didn’t particularly like me much at the best of times, and I had 5 of the “pies” while she had none… I started deliberately mis-answering or pretending I couldn’t remember whatever, in order to let her ‘catch up’…
She was cooking the dinner see…