I was known by an alias for one summer while hanging out with a bunch of kids who, for some reason, could not remember my given name of “Warren”, so I shrugged and said “fine, so call me Joe”. No reason to pick “Joe” as an alias, it was just the first thing that came into my head, possibly because of G.I. Joe.
Also, a friend of mine from HS changed her name as soon as she was legally able to do so on her own (practically the day she turned 18) from “Ethel” to “Cordelia”. She had been telling schoolmates to call her “Cordelia” for years, though I don’t think she ever got the nerve up to tell the teachers to not use the name on the registration info. Especially since our school ran from 7-12 grade, and it’s hard for an 11- or 12-year-old to muster that kind of initiative, and once you’re known to the teaching staff by a given name for a whole year, and it’s the name on your paperwork, it’s gonna stick.
My name is Floater and I’m a member of the Hash House Harriers (and that’s where I was given my name). That said, in the hashing community we use nicknames a lot, but one thing you never do is ask for a specific one. That will only result in something horrible. Once upon a time we had a new member who was to be given a name. He said that in other circles he was called Jolly Roger, and asked if we could do the same. Of course we couldn’t. We promptly called him Jolly Rogered instead (IIRC on my suggestion). For some reason he never came back.
How do you know if someone chose a nickname themselves, or is just telling you what other people actually call them? Am I supposed to query all their old friends?
I still say you call people what they want to be called, at least, at first. You can always try to introduce a (better) nickname later. But no need to create drama on something so unimportant. And definitely no need to judge them based on just a name.
I have been going by my nickname for over 20 years now - and yet the majority of my family refuse to call me that name, preferring to call me the nickname I hate. When I ask them why they won’t change - they tell me it’s because it’s not my name. WELL NEITHER IS THE OTHER ONE!
The irony? My mom has been going by her nickname our whole lives, and my brothers will introduce her by that name. When I point that out - they just look at me dumbfounded.
Once upon a time we had a new member who was to be given a name. He said that in other circles he was called Jolly Roger, and asked if we could do the same. Of course we couldn’t. We promptly called him