Aaarrrgh!! I woke up this morning out of a dream where i was being lashed/whipped in the back by my boyfriend and this other guy(i have no idea who he was). They were both just laughing wickedly. So when i woke up i had to tell myself for several minutes it was just a dream and not to be mad at my BF. (I was raging mad at him, luckily he was already at work.)
So then i go to start my brand new car and i can’t get the key to turn. After about 5 minutes it finally does. Then i drive through the coffee drive thru, get my coffee, place it my cupholder in my new car and as i’m driving away it spills up through the mouth hole. Yes, it defied physics.
Aaaargh!! I say. Continuing driving when bang! a rock hits my car. Ugh. I don’t know if it did damage because i was a few minutes late to work and couldn’t look thouroghly (sp). It sure hit hard though.
So now I’m waiting for lightning to strike me or some such thing. I’ve only been awake for 2 hours!!
Anyone else having a bad morning/day? I need to think positive and break this cycle before my whole day is ruined here.
Jeepers. You go right in there and tell your boss that Duck Duck Goose says you have permission to go home and go back to bed. Let somebody else deal with what’s on your desk. Obviously the gods are conspiring against you and a sensible person would go home.
And drive careful. And be very, very polite to any old men you might meet, especially if they have only one eye and a raven perching on each shoulder.
Are you sure you’re awake?
If so, go back to bed (Don’t try dreaming - remember what happened last time)and try getting up again - it can’t be that bad twice in a row. Can it?
DDG - Well, upon telling my boss that “Duck Duck Goose said i should go home, he just looked at me quite strangely.”
LOL
Seriously though, there’s no chance of going home. A couple people are on vacation this week and i actually have to stay till 5 whereas i normally leave at 4. It’s been a long week.
Okay, okay…calm down. What you have just described is commonly known in these parts as ‘A Good Day for Struuter.’
I am very in touch with what you’re going through. I’ll take you through this step by step.
Do NOT let anyone borrow your car today.
Do NOT handle sharp instruments/tools/weapons.
Do NOT handle flammable liquids.
Do NOT let your weakened state enable others to take advantage of you. (“Would you mind…Since you’re already…” You get the idea.)
Do NOT chance turning in front of that car with the turn signal on…they don’t know they left it on. Trust me.
Do NOT operate large machinery.
Remember: HALF a cup of coffee. Don’t offer to make the next pot.
Avoid eye contact with others. I can’t tell you why–but it always means trouble for people in your condition.
Call the bank. Balance your checking account. (When it rains…)
ANYTHING that you care about being done right, do yourself. Yes, even in your state of mind. Some kind soul may offer to help…oh, yes, it is a sincere offer of aid. But it never quite turns out that way…“I thought you said a cup of fish food in the aquarium and a pinch of water in the plant. Oops.”
And my last and best advice: Just tell yourself that it’s got to stop. Tell everyone that they are forbidden to give you anything but happy, good news.
Here is your first happy thought. Has anyone told you lately that you have lovely knees? You do. Have you ever considered becoming a knee model? I think you have a future.
Seriously, here’s hoping you find a twenty on the sidewalk.
struuter
You should probably have stayed in bed today.
It’s not friday the 13, but be carefull today anyway.
Watch out for black cats crossing the street and do not
go under a ladder…
Nooooo, you be fine, you had your bad things alreaddy today,
so now only the good things is left.
Thanks everyone, you guys are so sweet. I wish i could go home to bed, but i can’t. At least it’s friday.
I’m going home for lunch in 15min, and plan on driving very carefully. Cross your fingers I make it safely and don’t get sucked into any black holes or such.
Aww, how sweet. YES! i made it safely home where as i made myself a cheese sandwich (i didnt want to risk using microwave or oven) and returned safely to work. Aside from a slight headache, i seem to be fine and still in one piece.
However, it seems the bad luck has moved on to my SO.(serves him right for that whipping). Sadly, it affects me too though. My old car (90 Dodge Omni) is now his car. The driver’s door handle broke about 3 months ago so now you have to crawl in throught the passenger side. Well he called and informed me now that the passenger side door handle is broke as well. So now you have to crawl up through the back. Lol. I’ve gotten wierd looks crawling through the passenger side, now it’s his turn to look silly.
Always look on the bright side of life!
(Da-doo. D-doo, d-doo, d-doo)
It’s only two weeks till the Norfolk Dopefest!
(May I suggest you wear a belly shirt, preferably one with spaghetti straps. Also, leave the boyfriend/lasher at home!)
Greetings Gunslinger, (ye of the quality middle name)
Amen on the '69 Charger!
I would suspect that when one owns a '90 Omni with no working doors that has already been given to hubby, that one’s best option may well be a gallon of kerosine and a match.
