Kehria can also be performed, if one is not Orthodox*, by tearing a black ribbon pinned to your clothes.
*Not being Orthodox, I can’t speak to all branches, but I know Chabad-Lubavitch doesn’t accept it.
Thanks. I’ve never been to an Orthodox funeral. I’ve seen the un-seamed lapel at less observant ones.
No offense, but if I’m not totally grief-stricken and can plan ahead, is it OK to show up not wearing my favorite shirt (so that I don’t mind so much when that hideous shirt gets ripped)? (I can imagine it now; “Sorry, mom. I know you gave me that shirt for my birthday, but I went to sit Shiva at Dave’s house and I had to rip it.”)
Dewey Finn:
Only the mourners themselves (children, siblings, spouse or parents) of the deceased are obligated to rip their clothes, not visitors to the Shiva house.
And the rip is made at the funeral home or the cemetery, and the mourners are generally told ahead of time by the rabbi to wear a shirt they won’t mind losing for ordinary usage. Additionally, someone mourning for a second relative is allowed to wear a shirt ripped for the prior relative, and make a new rip therein for the new loss.
My Israeli friend ripped a blouse for her brother, and then sewed it up after the mourning period, but not perfectly…so it was obvious there had been a tear.
Yes, sewing it up loosely, so that it is still clear that the garment had been ripped, is allowed even by the Orthodox.
I like that idea, because the loss of that person does rend your life in a way that cannot ever be made like it was before. Quite an accurate symbolic gesture.
Backing up several posts: Leviticus 19:28 says “You shall not make any cuttings in your flesh for the dead, nor imprint any marks upon you.” Ranger Jeff’s reference is to the last part of the phrase, not the first, which is a prohibition against tattooing. Traditional Jewish practice forbids tattooing, hence, um, irony in having a Hebrew tattoo.
You’re right on target, man.
Well, if that was the point of the character having it, okay. I don’t watch SVU and didn’t see this episode, so I’m just commenting about it in a general way.
Noooooooooo kidding! Duh, gee, I never would’ve got that on my own!* :smack: 
*Sarcasm.
I certainly didn’t get the impression the character was Jewish. Kind of like the Western/American kids who get Chinese or Sanskrit tattoos. And it turns out that instead of “Peace to all people” the tattoo really says “the Navy regards your mother as a fine piece” or something. Or they wind up having the tattoos unknowingly done upside down.
I just had to respond to let you all know that the tattoo actually says “Sababba” which is slang for “awesome” in Israel. Kinda weird to see that on a criminal character on SVU!
Thank you so much – very cool!
Sheldon: “Why do you have the Chinese character for ‘soup’ tattooed on your right buttock?”
My parents did that to me. It hurt so much I couldn’t walk for about a year!
It actually says sababa. Samech bet bet hey. Sababa means awesome, or great.
Two of my tattoos are memorial pieces for friends that have died; one of them was Jewish. His sister gave me some shit over it.