Help me abandon NYC and move to southern California

Nyc native here, loved here 48 years and am employed in an internal bank. I’m over NYC…the weather, the cost, the people who visit, etc…want to move to a place where the sun is fierce and warm most of the time. Don’t mind earth quakes or fires, just don’t want to be here. My husband lived in Florida for years, and is up for a change…I have not go there due to the political scene, so how does one just uproot? Anyone ever do that? Regrets?

I lived in or around NYC for 25 years. When we relocated back here to help out my elderly parents, we had every intention of moving back when I was no longer needed here. But the logistics and cost are prohibitive, not to mention my own age now. So we are resigned to remain here, with lots of regrets. Before you make a decision, ask yourself about all the things you love about the City, all the things you’ll miss. I honestly don’t think a NYC native will be happy in SoCal. But of course YMMV.

Never having been in Southern California the things which come to mind are the long commutes, the sprawl. Southern California, like NYC, also has very high housing prices. Are you OK with these?

I moved from Appalachian Ohio to Los Angeles, then from LA to DC. If you have a job wherever you’re moving and some money, it’s pretty easy. If you lack either, it’s harder. If you lack both, it’s really hard.

Humph. If were fleeing the costs and tourism of NYC, the last place I’d go would be SoCal. Out of the frying pan, as it were. Maybe the deep inland bits?

This might make you pause. My granddaughter, having spent her first two college years in southern Cal is transferring to a school in Chicago (whose weather is generally worse than NYC’s, although not today). Among her reasons—although not her main reason—is that she dislikes the hot weather there. Since she grew up in moderate Seattle, she may turn out to dislike Chicago even more.

The cost of housing in SoCal is lower than in NYC on average, so that’s probably not a major issue.

Commuting can be an issue, but the solution is to live close to your job. Certain communities also have great public transportation, which can serve you for your work commute, but won’t solve all your transportation needs.

As for how to do it, once on a tour in Hawaii, another vacationer asked the tour guide, who had grown up in Ohio, how she managed to live in paradise.

Her answer:

“Sell your shit and move.”

Before you make a decision like this, I suggest spending some time in the proposed location… not in a hotel, but renting an apartment or house and renting a car. Maybe get a temp job. See what it’s actually like to live there.

The major deciding factor in uprooting my life in Ohio for SoCal was the weather. The worst case scenario was that I’d rather be a bum on the streets here than live financially “comfy” in Ohio.

The flip side is that if you’re “financially comfy” in Ohio you can afford to travel frequently, while having the means to live a lifestyle that would be distinctly uncomfortable on the same income in southern California.

If you’re going to move to SoCal I strongly suggest Santa Barbara or San Diego, and seriously, avoid LA. And by that I mean the area to avoid is the rough triangle bounded by a line drawn from Van Nuys in the NW (jct 405 & 101), to Rancho Cucamonga in the NE (jct 210 & 15), to Newport Beach in the S (near jct PCH (1) & 55) and back. To me, that is “LA” – perhaps not geographically accurate but to me that’s the jungly mess to stay away from.

Santa Barbara or San Diego are where you want to be. Otherwise, inside that triangle you are trapped by hours upon hours of traffic just to get away. It is suffocating.

Southern California sucks. Pick Arizona, New Mexico, Nevada or even Utah.

Life is good here. Yes there are traffic issues. But the climate is awesome. Beware of microclimates however. Life west of the 405 if you can afford it.

I believe a step-by-step guide to this move already exists.

I’d say do this if you’ve been told by the crossroads demon that you’re never allowed to move again once you get there.

If you don’t mind drought, wildfires and ungodly water bills.

Look into the south San Gabriel Valley - Monterey Park, Alhambra, San Gabriel, Rosemead, El Monte. I like it here. Affordable, good schools, safe, lots of Chinese (both the people and the food).

I’ve only ever lived in the NY area and SoCal (LA and San Diego), besides living overseas for awhile. I’m from NY. I ended up staying in NY area, even now when no longer tied here by job. I liked CA alright, but NY is home. And it’s not just earthquakes v weather, but the lesser ‘rootedness’ of most people out there was another downside for me. Which might be true in certain circles in NY, people who come from all over to work in finance etc. But I have deep roots here, generations. LA had the advantage over places where I would always be the outsider, but out there most people are the outsiders and I don’t think that’s so positive. Also while everyone’s view of LA and NY IMO can be influenced by movies/TV shows set there, even people who live there, I found some truth to the common movie/TV image of LA as racially divided, more than NY. Both are just personal impressions, perhaps easily explained by saying I’m a NY’er biased in favor of NY.

I moved from Hawaii to Seattle and then Los Angeles.

Like panache suggested, I strongly encourage you to visit here before you pack up and move. When you do, leave the touristy areas. Do some research, pick a safe neighborhood, and then go to supermarkets, find post offices, pharmacies, restaurants, movie theaters, etc., as though you’re living here. Whatever stuff you like to do in NYC, see what equivalents there are here. Google, Yelp, and maps are super useful, even for longtime residents. Get a feel for what the place is like. You may find there are things about SoCal you dislike and don’t want to experience regularly.

I have few regrets. I actually don’t like the 6 months of hot weather. I live on the West side. Traffic isn’t too bad for us because we live and do most of our day-to-day stuff within 5 miles of our apartment. I take public transportation. Tourists are easily avoided. Cost of living is high, of course, but we’re DINKs and I have a decent-sized savings. Earthquakes are infrequent and usually no big deal; fires mostly happen where the landscape is conducive to it, so nowhere near me. I have found a few places that remind me of home. LA’s not for everyone, but in my experience, even people who hated LA had something they liked about it.

I was born in ‘L.A.’ (actually a suburb of L.A.), grew up in San Diego until I was 15, moved to northern L.A. County (Mojave Desert), and then lived in the City of Los Angeles for 17 years. The L.A. weather was driving me nutso. Too hot, too sunny every freakin’ day, etc. So I moved to the Pacific Northwest coast, just under Canada.

Traffic is a bitch. But! Motorcycles are allowed to split lanes. So if you ride, you can avoid most of the waiting. If you don’t ride, there are many different routes you can take to get around the L.A. area. The bad news is that they’re often bad too.

If you’re familiar with NYC with its public transportation, you’ll probably be disappointed. I moved away before MetroLink went anywhere I wanted to go. (Or more accurately, it would take me as long to get to the MetroLink station and ride the train, as it would take me to simply take myself to my destination directly.)

San Diegans say San Diego has The Perfect Climate. Maybe. And you can have fires on the beaches, which is cool. And Mexican food is good and plentiful. But ‘You can’t go home again’. I always find San Diego depressing when I go back. But that’s just me.