[QUOTE=JohnBckWLD]
'Cuz if you didn’t, I’d say fuck it and just ignore the summons altogether.
[/QUOTE]
I wondered about that. Mine was just a letter. The Judge commented, “..the number of responders we had…” which made me think they didn’t send the gendarmes out to draw and quarter those who didn’t show up after all.
It is damn depressing to think that if I’m on trial it will be those jocks and giggling valley girls I was with who will decide my fate.
[QUOTE=JohnBckWLD]
'Cuz if you didn’t, I’d say fuck it and just ignore the summons altogether.
Who the hell are they to tell anyone they have to take time away from their own lives and show up at the court house? Why should anyone be forced to go before them and make excuses as to why they don’t want to sit in a box with over a dozen sweating, unemployed yahoos making $9 an hour while listening to a bunch of scumbags dragging out the proceedings to add more billing hours at the rate of over $250 a pop. Fuck em. They live by the ‘prove it beyond a shadow of doubt’ credo - let them prove you even read their fucking summons.
[/QUOTE]
This is very stupid advice. Gfactor, Bricker or several other legal beagles can tell you exactly why.
However, I can tell you that one judge out here got tired of this and issued bench warrents for everyone who didn’t show up.
Here’s a cite about what happened to one other idiot like yourself:
http://www.wndu.com/news/headlines/9769967.html
"A Berrien County man was recently jailed for failing to show up for jury duty.
Frank Kirschner says his only crime is being forgetful.
Kirschner is a 51-year old self employed manufacturing representative, who has never been in legal trouble before.
This week, he spent 15-hours behind bars in the Berrien County Jail, where fellow inmates taught him how to make a pillow out of a roll of toilet paper and his shoe…
In June of 2007 Kirschner was the subject of a police traffic stop. That’s when he found out that he had an outstanding warrant for failing to show for jury duty."
And let us say got yerself a super sharp lawyer and fought this all the way up? 1st- you are stooped on the way somewhere (maybe very important) and 2. hauled off to jail, with all the body cavity searching fun that is. :rolleyes: 3 Your car is impounded (around $500 out here). 4. You have to post bail. 5. You may lose a day of work, or even your job. 6. You pay very expensive legal fees. So that’s 1-10 days of your life lost (and your boss won’t pay you for them, ferssure), and $5000-$50000 gone. Only a complete fucking moron would bet with that kind of bad payoff vs jury duty. You sir, are that complete fucking moron.
However, I must warn my fellow SDMBers about the “Jury Duty scam”
http://www.woodtv.com/Global/story.asp?S=7174280&nav=menu44
Doesn’t mean that I “don’t listen to the facts.” Nor am I going to say, “Your Honor, I think that I would decide I don’t like someone and will vote that way!” I’m not THAT stupid! 
And thank you so much for implying I fake my seizures. :dubious:
(If you were kidding, never mind)
[QUOTE=Giraffe]
Just be honest. If you’d actually make a shittier juror than the other people in your pool, it’ll come out in the questioning. If the trial is more than a couple of days, tell the judge you can’t afford to miss work and ask to be excused. Trying to lie your way out is a bad idea.
Note that there’s no guarantee you’ll be excused due to either of these – if everyone was excused from jury duty who didn’t want to do it or who would lose money from the lost time, we wouldn’t have enough jurors for a day’s worth of trials.
[/QUOTE]
Thank you. That’s the only think I wanted to hear. I don’t want to have to be the one who decides someone’s fate. I don’t think I could live with myself if I made the wrong decision. Maybe that’s being selfish. Oh well.
[QUOTE=DrDeth]
You sir, are that …
[/QUOTE]
I apologize for this, thought we were in the PIT, missed the edit window. :smack:
[QUOTE=Guinastasia]
And thank you so much for implying I fake my seizures.
(If you were kidding, never mind)
[/QUOTE]
She implied no such thing. She suggested that you fake a seizure to get out of jury duty. If anything, that implies that your seizures are usually genuine.
Anyhoo
Wear a snood. I bet lawyers don’t trust somebody in a snood.
Or show up wearing only a snood.
[QUOTE=DrDeth]
However, I can tell you that one judge out here got tired of this and issued bench warrents for everyone who didn’t show up.
[/QUOTE]
You’re really happy about the cattle being punished for not falling into line, aren’t you? 
[QUOTE=Cheesesteak]
If I’m on the hook to get called for your jury, you can be on the hook for my jury.
[/QUOTE]
Can you be on the hook for fellow citizen’s hospital bills, too? How about their rent cheques? Their credit score?
For some people, missing a few days of work means that they will have to go for a few days eating one or zero meals a day, or have to pay bills late and end up with black marks on their credit file. I get the feeling that some people hear “I can’t afford to miss work” as “I am saving up for a video iPod”. :rolleyes:
I am not saying that is Guin’s situation - I have no idea what state her finances are in. I just keep thinking that it’s very easy to have these lofty principles when you don’t have to worry about keeping your lights turned on this month.
[QUOTE=DocCathode]
She implied no such thing. She suggested that you fake a seizure to get out of jury duty. If anything, that implies that your seizures are usually genuine.
Anyhoo
Wear a snood. I bet lawyers don’t trust somebody in a snood.
Or show up wearing only a snood.
[/QUOTE]
Fair enough. Around here, you never know.
[QUOTE=kung fu lola]
I just keep thinking that it’s very easy to have these lofty principles when you don’t have to worry about keeping your lights turned on this month.
[/QUOTE]
My complaint of being treated badly by judicial assholes pales compared to your comment. I am not being sarcastic; it is better than I attend a moronic judge’s pep rally than someone go hungry.
I’m not in danger of going hungry. I just have too damned many bills to pay. You want to pay off the ambulance bills, or for my Lamictal? Be my guest.
[QUOTE=carnivorousplant]
My complaint of being treated badly by judicial assholes pales compared to your comment. I am not being sarcastic; it is better than I attend a moronic judge’s pep rally than someone go hungry.
[/QUOTE]
Wow, thanks.
Sometimes I think people forget that it is possible to be a good, responsible, gainfully employed adult, and still have to live from paycheque to paycheque.
Especially people around here.
[QUOTE=kung fu lola]
Wow, thanks.
[/QUOTE]
Christ on a crutch. Who are “people around here”, the Dope or your city/county?
Who is in the worse situation, the juror who can’t afford to be there, the people of color involved in a minor accident who unknowingly accrue a huge medical bill, or the innocent person of color who as plaintiff must hire a lawyer to defend her against the lawyer in cowboy boots?
I was particularly pissed off that the Valley Girls/Jocks did not listen to my comments that we should make the other side pay for the plaintiff’s lawyer.
Oh yeah, and the Judge, also a person of color who is more interested in holding a pep rally where the white jurors respond “Yes Your Honor!” to “I can’t hear you!” than in resolving the situation fairly.
The whole thing fellates with great alacrity.
[QUOTE=carnivorousplant]
Who is in the worse situation, the juror who can’t afford to be there, the people of color involved in a minor accident who unknowingly accrue a huge medical bill, or the innocent person of color who as plaintiff must hire a lawyer to defend her against the lawyer in cowboy boots?
I was particularly pissed off that the Valley Girls/Jocks did not listen to my comments that we should make the other side pay for the plaintiff’s lawyer.
[/QUOTE]
(bolding added)
I think you mean the defendant, here. The plaintiff is the one who brings the suit.
And, tort reform is a whole other kettle of fish - that is trying to find a way to allow valid suits to go through while still minimizing the ability of a twit to harass people through the courts.
[QUOTE=kung fu lola]
Can you be on the hook for fellow citizen’s hospital bills, too? How about their rent cheques? Their credit score?
[/QUOTE]
If jury duty is a financial hardship, present that as an excuse to be given an exemption. It’s a perfectly valid reason to get an exemption. I’m also one who thinks that being a full time college student is a valid excuse to get a deferral until a time when classes are not in session.
OTOH, there is a sizable contingent who suggest that the government is making an inherently unreasonable imposition by requiring people to report to jury duty. Your personal desire to live life without being hassled by jury duty is an entirely different thing than trying to avoid financial ruin.
The jury trial system is a key component that allows our society to function. It provides the framework for the enforcement of criminal law and a manner for civil disputes to be fairly settled. Without jurors, there is no system, and that’s bad news for all of us, not just the civic minded ones. It’s not a perfect system, but it’s better than a completely non-functional one.
[QUOTE=OtakuLoki]
I think you mean the defendant, here. The plaintiff is the one who brings the suit.
[/QUOTE]
Excellent! I don’t know who is who! Another reason I should not serve on a jury.
[QUOTE=carnivorousplant]
Christ on a crutch. Who are “people around here”, the Dope or your city/county?
[/QUOTE]
People on the Dope. So many of them are people who work hard, earned an education, are prudent with their money… but can’t accept that someone who is of a lower economic class than them could have done all those things, too, and just been unlucky or lacking in opportunity. I often see this Calvinistic attitude that the poor are poor because they deserve to be.
But that is for another thread. Sorry about the hijack.
[QUOTE=Guinastasia]
I’m not in danger of going hungry. I just have too damned many bills to pay. You want to pay off the ambulance bills, or for my Lamictal? Be my guest.
[/QUOTE]
Personal hardship wouldn’t get you excused from service, only a postponement of the date, at least in my jurisdiction:
To be excluded from service entirely requires one of the following:
No longer living in the County
Not being a citizen
Medical reason with a physician’s note
Your finances are not a consideration.
[QUOTE=ASAKMOTSD]
I believe it was Steve Martin that recommended that you simply state that you support the death penalty for parking violations.
[/QUOTE]
That was his solution for overpopulation, not a gambit to evade jury duty.
Though it might work. Beard and ponytail have kept me from serving, so far.
[QUOTE=JohnBckWLD]
'Cuz if you didn’t, I’d say fuck it and just ignore the summons altogether.
Who the hell are they to tell anyone they have to take time away from their own lives and show up at the court house? Why should anyone be forced to go before them and make excuses as to why they don’t want to sit in a box with over a dozen sweating, unemployed yahoos making $9 an hour while listening to a bunch of scumbags dragging out the proceedings to add more billing hours at the rate of over $250 a pop. Fuck em. They live by the ‘prove it beyond a shadow of doubt’ credo - let them prove you even read their fucking summons.
[/QUOTE]
Yeah! Because the government is thereby making a gigantic imposition on your life, and what has it ever done for you? NOTHING!
Geez, it’s not like you have roads to drive on, and a police force you can call upon if someone breaks into your house or knocks you on the head, and a team of trained professionals ready to come help at a moment’s notice if your house catches fire, and a well-established set of laws designed to protect you from ill-wishers, and a system of courts set in place so that, if someone DOES do wrong to you, you can get restitution.
I mean, really, if we had all that, like in some utopian fantasy-world, then yeah, maybe–just MAYBE–it might be worth spending a few days helping a fellow citizen out by listening to the presentation of evidence in his case to decide if you think he’s been wronged or not.
But since we don’t have any of that, you’re right. Fuck 'em. Let their fate be decided by a jury of twelve people who are so stupid they can’t figure out how to get out of jury duty. Ha! Suckers!
Because YOU will never need the services of a jury, right? You don’t commit crimes, you don’t commit torts, and you don’t breach contracts, right? Sure! Fuck 'em!
And no one is EVER falsely accused of ANYTHING, right? Defendants never, ever win civil or criminal trials, right? Presentation of opening argument = summary judgment for plaintiff/state, right?
(Since you seem rather irony-proof, here’s a tip, Sesame Street style: This post was brought to you by the letters S, A, R, C, A, S, and M.)
"Your honour, I cannot sit on this jury, for it is God’s work to judge sinners.
My job is to send them to him (manical glint in eye…)"
mm