Help Me or Shoot Me: In which I solicit advice on learning the trombone

In My Humble Opinion
1

For a goodly portion of my life I’ve held dear the notion of learning to play a musical instrument; specifically, the tenor or bass trombone. Now, understand, owing to certain family difficulties, the closest I’ve ever come to playing an actual instrument was the brief posession of a plastic Suzuki recorder in fourth grade, and then I probably learned nothing more complex than “Three Blind Mice”. Nor can I claim any great competency in reading sheet music or otherwise being anything more than a total dimwit with regard to the production of melodic noise.

So:
[list=a]
[li]Should I even bother trying to learn to play the trombone, or is it totally hopeless?[/li][li]Am I diving into the deep end with this selection of instrument? Should I start with something easier, like the kazoo?[/li][li]Where is the best place to look for an instrument of reasonable quality? Should I buy cheap and trade up, or spend the money on a better grade of instrument outright?[/li][li]Where is the best place, in the context of a post-collegiate environment, to seek tutoring in this instrument and basic music instruction?[/li][li]How long is it likely to take me to develop even a marginal competency to where the noise I make no longer frightens small children and makes neighborhood dogs bark insanely?[/li][li]Should I just give up the whole business and take a trip to Tahiti instead?[/li][/list]

Stranger

2

Go for it! Adults can learn just as well as kids. But don’t expect any shortcuts due to your senior status, it’ll still take years & lots of work.

It’s not the most difficult instrument, by any stretch of the imagination, and there’s little point starting on something ‘easier’, because you’ll only learn a limited amount that is of any relevance.

Pass. Brass players will be along shortly, I’m sure.

I’d start with university music departments, such as here and here, asking if they know of students who offer private tuition.

3

I played trombone from 5th grade up till college. It is at once easier and more difficult. Firstly, you don’t just press a button and blow to hit a note; you have to move the slide to one of several positions, and there’s no guide lines or anything. But it also makes it easier to adjust your pitch on the fly.

I know you can rent instruments, but I don’t know if that’s just for students or what. That would be the way to go until you figure out if you want to keep going or not. Your local musical instrument store should do this. There might be postings for tutors there as well.

4

[list=a]
[li]Go for it, if you’ve any musical aptitude at all.[/li][li]All instruments, other than toys, are equally deep. Inherently easy instruments get harder music written for them. F’rinstance, the trumpet is harder to play twiddly bits on than the clarinet; so the clarinet gets more twiddly bits written for it. The recorder is easy to get a sound out of, but insanely hard to play remote keys on (lots of sharps or flats).[/li][li]Hire or buy cheap in the first place, but if you can get a teacher or an accomplished trombonist to try out the instrument and advise on its suitability, so much the better; at the very least, sound out the reputation of the shop you’re about to buy from. I picked up, as a second instrument, a very reasonable cornet from Cash Converters of all places; they turn out to have a pretty savvy music department.[/li][li]Find a private teacher. When I took up the trumpet, the shop that sold the instrument had a directory of local teachers. The teacher I settled for was one the shop-owner, himself a trumpeter, had personally known for many years and played with for a long time. Dave and I were of an age, and got on superbly - and as an ex-Coldstream Guards soloist who’d gone on from there, he had a fantastic CV too.[/li][li]Depends how much you practise. Brass especially benefits from extensive regular practice, as you need to build up the muscles as well as develop the neural pathways.[/li][li]No. With a little luck you’ll turn out to be a virtuoso and make enough money to visit Tahiti all you like <–wildly optimistic :smiley: [/li][/list]

5

I’m a bass trombone player, though I haven’t touched it in almost a year I got to play in a concert last year.

I learned it so it’s not hopeless.

Hell a kazoo might be harder to play well!

Either goto the local music shop that stocks student instruments, or if you’re lucky a place that repairs them. I almost had a really nice bass trombone when I first started college but couldn’t afford it. You can also check out pawn shops in the area.

Unless you are getting a good deal I would start with a student model, they used to run only a few hundred bucks, and they will generally take them back. My bass cost close to $2000. So unless you find a great deal used I wouldn’t spend the money.

If you have one of those places that sells student instruments then they will either have lessons or will know who gives them. Or you could try going back to the fifth grade.

Don’t really know, you should be able to get through songs pretty fast, a few weeks, but they might not sound pretty, especially if you don’t have much of a musical background. I would say if you kept up with it a few months. I honestly don’t remember what we played after a few months years ago.

Only if you take me too.

Personally I would stay away from the bass trombone for now, it’s very heavy, the mouth piece is much larger then a tenor, and it has lots more confusing part to it. They are also harder to play because of the size. I know it takes me awhile to get back in to it and sound good. The tenor on the other had will be much lighter, only has a slide and the middle range has a much better sound to it. Plus you’re probably not going to find a cheap bass and if you didn’t like it might have a hard time getting rid of it.

6

You want to play the trombone?

Ask yourself these questions.
Do I enjoy spraying water on saxophone players?
Am I naturally a clown?
Do you have the urge to ‘talk’ like a grown-up on Charlie Brown?
If you said ‘yes’ to any of these questions, you could be a trombone player!

7

I choose “shoot you”.

The trombone is a Barbarism, not unakin to Malacious Mopery, Supply-Side Economics, or Harboring A Mime, & should be prosecuted as such.

8

Rock on! I’ve never heard anyone else say “I want to play an instrument - I know, trombone!”

Even when I started playing 15 years ago, I only played it because no one else wanted to :slight_smile:

Good good. You will fit in with other trombone players nicely :wink:

Like others have said, trombone is just as hard to learn as any other instrument…I particularly like it because the mouthpiece is a good size. Not tiny like french horn or trumpet and not huge like a tuba.

And, you only have to use your mouth and one hand, as opposed to valve instruments where you need a little bit of digital dexterity :slight_smile:

I have the same rent-to-own student trombone from when I was in 5th grade and it sounds/works as well as any other. Do not spend alot of $$ on an instrument unless you’re being paid to play it or you seriously are good and enjoy it.

Another nice thing about trombone is there’s so few parts to get messed up. A valve instrument might have bad tubes here or there or crappity valves. But with a trombone if the slide works, you’re good. Use the tuning slide to stay relatively in tune (in first position) and otherwise just put your slide where it sounds on pitch.

When you do get a horn, get thee some slide grease, a water bottle, a nice white cloth and some slide oil for when you forget to bring the first 3.

Yeah, like they said, music store.

Probably just a few weeks of solid practice. But it depends how much you practice.

No. Doing cool things like taking a trip to Tahiti kind of disqualifies you from ever being able to be a trombone player. A real trombone player is more likely to do stuff like go to ComiCon, decide to take up piano and banjo at the same time, or just stay home and drink beer (trombone-ness varies from person to person, but it all stays within the realm of “pretty un-cool”)

Trombone stuff you’ll need:
Trombone snake
Slide cream
spray bottle
Al Cass valve oil
Arbans

9

Ex-boner here. I never managed to learn how to read music, but I was pretty good at playing by ear and I did have a lot of fun (your lips get tired a lot in the beginning). Pick yourself up an inexpensive one, unless you plan on playing professionally. Later on, if you decide that you really like playing it, you can sell your inexpensive one and use the money to help defray the costs of an expensive model. Depending upon where you live, there’s probably a music store that handles used instruments or a pawn shop that will have one.

10

I’m going to run against the grain here. If you have never played any music, and can’t read sheet music, the cheapest way to start would be to buy a small cheap keyboard. One that has the notes labelled right above the keys. Or maybe color coded. Then you can take a few weeks (months?) to learn the notes and musical notation. While buzzing through a mouthpiece is not that hard, it’s certainly harder than hitting a key and so you end up learning only one thing at a time. First reading music, then playing the trombone.

Knowing how to read music (from playing the piano) was a huge benefit to me upon picking up the trombone. If you don’t even know what middle C is, how will you know if you are in tune?

Note listed in comments above… if you have braces on your teeth, find another instrument until you are out of them. (Yes, you sound older and most people out of high school don’t wear braces, but I have met a suprising number of people in their thirties who had a new set once they could afford it.)

11

My father played the trombone. In fact, he was a band leader who’s group toured the southwest after WWII.

He played well, but even so, the neighbors would’ve voted for your second option had not my mother made him put it away. Oh, he still snuck it out on occasion. I remember how it used to make me laugh when I was little listening to those weird sounds it made.

Maybe it’s for that reason that I simply can’t take a trombone seriously. It’s not a musical instrument; it’s sound effects.

12

I read that as tourtured the shouth west after WWII.

13

His tutor will tell him.

Hmm. I read music (poorly) before I took up my horn, so I can’t speak from experience, but I woudn’t worry about it. You can learn what the notes look like same time you’re learning what they sound like and how to produce them. Tho’ I’m not one of them, I know plenty of horn players who couldn’t read music before they started on their horns, and most of 'em play better than me. (Not that that’s saying much!)

IMO, all the brass instruments are pretty easy to begin on because the possible configurations of the horn are limited. As long as you’ve got the reach, trombone isn’t any harder than the rest.

–Cliffy

14

Nah, that wasn’t him. He never drank.

:slight_smile:

15

Absolutely. Learning notation is the least of your worries. That, at least, will be something you can just sit down an figure out by yourself.

16

I will put in my two cents.

Just for some background: I learned a brass instrument as a kid (trumpet, I was 11), and I learned to read music while playing the piano around age 4.

I would strongly suggest you go to your local music store and ask the folks there what you should do. They will most likely suggest a rental, and lessons (if they suggest a $10,000 professional instrument, get yourself to another music store). Most music stores have a staff of teachers or a list of folks that have signed up to teach. Get a beginners’ teacher, and make sure you let the person know you have no musical background. You might want to work toward a goal (a concert for your wife, say) so you’ll be more motivated to practice.

Learning to read music is really very easy, especially when you’re only dealing with one clef.

Be prepared for red, funky looking lips after practicing. Get intimately acquainted with lip balm, chapped lips are hell to play through. Always brush your teeth before playing. I didn’t as a kid. Blech.

One last very important thing. Practice EVERY DAY. Your mouth will get tired. This will pass in a week or two, but you have to “play through the pain”. It’s just like any other exercise.

17

Well, sure. Lots of people learn to read music while learning to play the trombone. Obviously not mandatory. But… for the $50 it takes to buy a cheap keyboard and teach yourself the notes, I still say it is an easier way to start. May even pay fror iteself as you wouldn’t be paying your tutor to teach you notation.