Help!! My cousin is retarted!!!

[Alessan]

@Locrian

That’s the phony priest’s answer I was looking for. Thanks.

I’m not a Christian, but I play one on the Internet.

[Magiver]

You may learn more about life from your cousin then he does from you.

Any environ that turns away the innocent isn’t heaven.

[Lobohan]

Luckily there isn’t a heaven, so your cousin’s consciousness will end at his death. Just like yours will.

Doesn’t that make you feel better?

[quedefuk]

He can if he registers as Republican. I heard a preacher say so.

[RickJay]

@Capitaine_Zombie

That’s why I’ll never be Muslim. If I have to share my heavenly cell with ninety broads, they’d better be sluts.

1. I thought it was 72.

2. It’s your job to MAKE them sluts. If you don’t want your 72, I’ll gladly work on 144.

[don_t_ask]

@The_Second_Stone

You seem to have misspelled the word “retarded”. You used “retarted”, which gives the impression that it is genetic and that your cousin is a slut. Sluts do not go to heaven, but they do go everywhere else. Retarded people, on the other hand, are known to live in Crawford, Texas.

Hang on this was all in good taste up until this post. Sluts do not go to heaven…

Surely that can’t be true. I know they aren’t one of the blesseds, like the poor in spirit, or the mourners or the fucking oh-so-mighty meek, or even the cheesemakers, but surely there must be a little corner of the Garden of Heaven set aside for sluts.

And if not where the hell did Mary Magdalene end up?

[ITR_champion]

@copperwindow

I have a cousin who, I just found out, is mentally retarded. Can he go to heaven when he dies?

Yes.

[Freudian_Slit]

I don’t know, but if your cousin was a dog, he’d be allowed in, per the teachings of Rod Serling.

[John_Mace]

Rather than throwing something like this out to a bunch of strangers on the internet, I suggest you ask a priest or minister or whatever in the place of worship you attend to answer this question. Most people around here don’t even believe in heaven.

[Skammer]

@Locrian

Depends what you want to believe. Some of faith claim that if you can’t consciously male a claim to accept Jesus as your savior, you got no chance. Others in Catholic school told me that it is okay to take medicine (for things like schizophrenia) is okay because it will help them and they can eventually accept Jesus. Some believers will tell you only god provides, so no medicine and purgatory is all you get. Others will tell you everyone from Hitler to their first childhood dog is waiting for them there.

With all of this BS about an afterlife in the first place, why worry about it at all? His time here on earth is what’s important.

For me, if it is all up to a skydaddy allegedly responsible for killing 33 million of his own creation, I doubt he’d be a creature of sympathy to anyone, no matter how just or how handicapped.

That’s a lot of ignorance in one post. Do you have a cite for “Some of faith claim that if you can’t consciously ma[k]e a claim to accept Jesus as your savior, you got no chance.”? On the other hand, every Christian denomination I can think of has some kind of doctrine of accountability concerning people like infants or the mentally infirm.

However I also agree the OP is not serious.

[Wesley_Clark]

According to Betty J Eadie they let dogs and cats in so why not.

rimshot

If you want a more theistic answer I’d ask a preist. Personally I’d assume the same rules that apply to a 0-5 year old would apply to a retarded adult, since neither would be capable of making the conscious decisions that christianity say are required to enter heaven.

I really don’t know. I think in catholicism unbaptised babies go to limbo. But I’m guessing baptised babies go to heaven. But I’m not sure.

[jayjay]

@Wesley_Clark

I really don’t know. I think in catholicism unbaptised babies go to limbo. But I’m guessing baptised babies go to heaven. But I’m not sure.

They deprecated Limbo at Vatican II. Doesn’t exist now.

[Euphonious_Polemic]

@jayjay

They deprecated Limbo at Vatican II. Doesn’t exist now.

Did all those in Limbo get promoted? I hope so.

And I’ve just checked the appendix in the back of my KJV Bible. Good news and bad news for the OP:

Persons with Down’s Syndrome: IN
Persons who use terms like “retarded” to describe them: OUT
Persons who spell it “retarted”: RIGHT OUT
(Also: Dogs: IN, Cats: OUT
Gerbils: IN, Hampsters: OUT
Sluts: IN, Teases, OUT)

[running_coach]

@jayjay

They deprecated Limbo at Vatican II. Doesn’t exist now.

They told God how to arrange the afterlife?
Ballsy.

[Marley23]

Based on the OP’s history I don’t think this is a serious question. I’m closing this thread.