Nah, yo mamas so ugly not even Tom would be her friend.
Yo mama was standing on the street corner.
The police came along screaming “break it up”
Yo mama so fat, when she turn around in bed it shows on earthquake meters.
Yo momma so old, her social security number is 1.
Yo momma so old, she got Jesus’ beeper number.
Yo momma so fat, her belly gets home 5 minutes before she does.
Yo momma so fat, she’s on both sides of the family.
Yo momma so ugly, when she went to the haunted house, they offered her a job.
I’m an artist, really.
Yo mamma so loose, she don’t got a vagina, she got a clown car.
Yo momma’s so ugly, when she was born the doctor slapped her momma!
Yo momma’s such a ho, her gynecologist called me to tell me he found my missing baseball bat!
Tell yo mama to stop wearing different colored lipstick; my penis looks like a rainbow!
Sun Tzu says:
The art of war, then, is governed by five constant
factors, to be taken into account in one’s deliberations,
when seeking to determine the conditions obtaining in the field.
These are: (1) The Moral Law; (2) Heaven; (3) Earth;
(4) The Commander; (5) Yo’ mamma.
Your momma so dumb, on the way to the airport she saw a sign that said “Airport Left.” Bitch turned around and went home.
Yo momma’s so old, she shared a sack lunch with Moses in the first grade.
Yo momma’s so fat, she could kick start a 747.
Yo momma’s so ugly, the tree the ugly stick if from is on the endangered species list now.
Yo Mama so ugly, if she fell in the river they’d skim ugly for two weeks!
Yo’ momma came in the gas station the other day and asked how to get to 275,I told her to try Weight Watchers.
Yo Momma so fat when you close your eyes to blow out the candles your wish is that the cake will still be there.
Yo Momma so fat she went out in high heels and came back in flip flops.
Yo Momma so hairy yo Daddy used a weed whacker on her face only to find out it was her ass.
Yo Momma is so hairy when your brother was born he died of carpet burns.
Yo Mamma so fat she showed up at a party and they all shouted, Yeah… The Bouncy Castle has arrived!
Yo Momma so dumpy she had to get a restraining order from the garbage man.
Yo Momma so loose you cartwheeled out of her.
Yo Momma so stupid she sold her car for gas money.
Yo Momma so old she lost her virginity to a Druid.