I don’t like to be a spoilsport but I’ve had enough already: A month from theatrical release and I’m ready to theatrically release my teevee out the window and onto an un-expectant public. This media hype is bollocks!
How many hundreds of millions are forecast for merchandising, how many for ticket sales, will it be the most popular kids film of all time, blah, blah, bloody blah ? And don’t forget next years follow up, kiddies. Better start saving those pennies now! I just can’t get away from it – it’s like the friggin Spice Girls on steroids (hi Sporty! Nice triceps).
I’m sure you’re a lovely lady, Ms Rowling-in-millions, but would you mind terribly if I plunged my Mary Poppins umbrella deep into your Chamber of Secrets, actually your Goblet of Fire would do, and fanned that cauldron of creative juices with impassioned vigour until you were as dry as witch’s snatch. Thanks awfully.
That feels better. Now back to my video of ‘Grumpy Old Men’. Now that’s a good film…
Not watching any television for several months has its plusses, true.
The downsides include the inability to relate to such rants as this.
I have heard that the books offer intense occult training to their readers. The book is usually better than the movie, but it would be a shame if the movie doesn’t offer at least mild occult training.
If (to crib shamelessly from someone in the Chick thread) reading about pointing wands at things and saying a few words of garbled Latin counts as intense occult training, then yes, yes they do.
[torn between hysterical laughter and feelings of immense “get a life” pity for these thousands of people, who stood in line for HOURS, not to see the movie, but just to STAND THERE AND LOOK AT THE PLACE WHERE THE HARRY POTTER MOVIE WOULD BE PLAYING]
And, hey, all my favorite people were there! Sting! Fergie! Cher! Michael Flatley!
You know, it really, really ruins my fantasy when they show Sting on tv with his daughter. He can’t be the star of my X-rated fantasy when I’m reminded that he is a married man with children!
A finely crafted piece of prose, Mr L_C. I particularly liked the third paragraph.
But strangely enough, I often rather enjoy the hype. Go figure, eh?
Not this time though. If I hear one more cretin say her books are “original”… THEY’RE NOT BLOODY ORIGINAL! WELL DONE, YES! CLEVERLY THOUGHT OUT, YES! BUT NOT ORIGINAL! IT’S ALL BEEN DONE BEFORE!
It could be worse, at least its not people queueing for the Spice Girls!
Actually, L_C, I’ll put money that you’d have a go at her “Goblet of Fire”, phfwar har har. nudge nudge wink wink.
[off-topic]I just wanted to post at pepperlandgirl, and let her know that I feel her pain.
Oh yes, indeed I do. Sting is the second-sexiest … err … third-sexiest man in the world as far as I’m concerned. MmmmmSting … he just drives me wild with “Hungry For You”! Growr!
Perhaps we should join forces to topple evil Sting-wife Trudie, and seduce him away from her with our own organic brand of olive oil. I’m willing to share my X-rated fantasies… :)[/off-topic]
I haven’t seen any Harry Potter references at all, anywhere really. Then again I turn the television on only so I can ignore it while I write. Maybe they’re not hyping it in Indiana? I find it odd that the whole world is inundated with it and I haven’t seen any …
And yes, L_C, I agree with kabbes - that third paragraph is exceptionally good
I turned mine off again a few months ago, and have missed all the wonderful hype that Hollywood is so skilled at shovelling.
I can go see the movie without the bad taste of a metric fuck-ton of hype in my mouth. My first (and likely only) exposure to the hype was a trailer shown before Monsters, Inc.
I do think it’s wonderful that kids are reading books thicker than a terrorist’s bunker ceiling. I also hope the film works for them (it seems to have been a close adaptation) but I don’t think I need the media circus reporting on how the media’s reporting media reporting of the friggin Premiere. Is that life reporting on art reporting on life ? Whatever it is, it does indicate to me more than a little barrel scraping.
Thanks for the support, Goosie. If you barricade the front door, I’ll take the back and, if we can get SK wasted, we’ll put him up on the roof behind a few sandbags. Remeber: Aim low – these people are short.
[leaps up and does happy dance around the dining room again]
Yay!! I’m not the only one who noticed that Rowling wasn’t original!! Not a speck!
[sits back down again]
Whew. You know, I finally got around to reading the first book, months after the “Here comes the second book!” hullabaloo was over, and I sat there reading it and thinking, “This isn’t original. This is a complete pastiche of every fairy tale I ever read. Every storytelling archetype you can name is in here.” All I could figure is that the folks who hailed it as an original masterpiece have never read anything other than their own bylines in Time magazine.
But you know, I don’t object to the Harry Potter books. It’s not that they’re bad books. I’ve read all of them, and they’re actually pretty good, as fairy tales full of standard character archetypes and plot lines go. It’s just that they’re not “masterpieces”. They’re the equivalent of Dominick Dunne or Danielle Steele or Stephen King, for fifth-graders who like stories about magic.
No, what LC and I object to is the media hype surrounding the movie release. I was watching Pokemon with Bonzo the other day, and no kidding, every single commercial break in that 26-minute show had one plug for a Harry Potter-related product, if not for the movie itself, then for McDonalds or Burger King or whoever it is who got the fast-food toy license, or for one of all the other merchandising tie-ins.
Yes, the books were well-written but utterly unoriginal.
As movies aimed at children go, however, the film looks like it might be really outstanding. John Hurt, Maggie Smith, Richard Harris, Robbie Coltrane, John Cleese, and of course, my personal hero, Alan Rickman, are all in the cast. With an lineup like that, how bad can it possibly be?
It would seem, Duckie, that you need to immediately come over to London to be surrounded by similar-thinking folks. Namely L_C and I.
Originality? Pah. One of the favorite stories back when I was a kid was “The Worst Witch” about… (wait for it)… a school for witches! They even made a TV series about it, or something. And it’s not like anyone was even claiming that was original at the time!
The goodies are stereotypical goodies. The baddies are stereotypical baddies. Archetype? Too bloody right archetype. What she’s done so well is provide lots of details. Kids like details.
I found the books enormously good fun for a week’s holiday reading. Well done Rowling. Now off you go and write a staggeringly original piece of literature about little piggies who have houses built out of straw, twigs and bricks. And we can all marvel at where you get your ideas from.
