[QUOTE=asterion]
Why do all my cooking-related pit threads wind up with me being asked for a recipe?
[/QUOTE]
Sorry for the hijack. I’ve been branching out with my cooking and I have some breasts in the freezer. I’m going to use your recipe.
And thanks, don’t ask, for the breast tips. (Nipples?)
At least you don’t own a parrot. We’ve had a few fire alarms and it’s THE coolest thing he’s ever heard in his life and he’ll attempt to relive the moment now and again.
scottkris
Would you clarify this message?
[QUOTE=NinjaChick]
Augh! Yes. I live in a college dorm. Each room has a smoke detector, and they’re wired into the building’s system, with a backup battery. Which, if it is not at 90% charge or above, will cheerfully exhaust the rest of the batteries charge with chirping. Every ten minutes. Nonstop.
What you’re supposed to do in that case is call Buildings and Grounds, file a work request, and wait an average of a week for them to come and replace it. They won’t bring their own step-stool, they’ll just stomp their snow-and-dirt covered boots all over your desk chair. And then they won’t lock your bloody door on their way out.
One would think you could just take the battery out, but no. It continues chirping.
Why the hell is this necessary? It’s a dorm room - it’s not like a fire is going to start where I can’t see it. If the power goes out, and if I light a candle or something in my room, and if I leave that candle burning while I’m out, and if a magical pixie knocks over said candle and if it lands on something flammable and ignites it, then I guess it would be good to have that backup.
Right, I’m done now. deep breaths
[/QUOTE]
Sorry that the people in charge aren’t responsive or respectful of your property. Because it’s a hardwire system, it is still monitoring battery voltage, and if low, it chirps. The solution is to replace all of the batteries in a building at one shot, using high quality alkaline replacement cells-preferably during summer break. But I’m not in charge of your maintenance scheduling. 
Why is it necessary? Because people die without them.
[QUOTE=United States Fire Administration]
Each year in the United States. there are an estimated 1,300 fires in high school, private and prep school, and university dormitories. These fires are responsible for less than 5 deaths, and approximately 50 injuries and $4.1 million in property loss annually.
[/QUOTE]
These are 2001 numbers, and don’t reflect data from the Seton Hall University fire in South Orange, New Jersey, which killed three students in 2003.
One final thought-the NFPA recommends replacing smoke detectors if they are 10 years old, owing to sensitivity drift. Detectors can become insensitive to smoke, or overly-sensitive. I recommend writing the date of installation inside the cover or on the back side of the detector with a Sharpie-then you’ll know when to toss it. The other option is to purchase detectors with ultra long life lithium cells-they are meant to last 10 years and then be replaced.
Personally I find smoke detectors in the kitchen a great help.
Dinner is ready ten minutes after they start beeping.
[QUOTE=danceswithcats]
Sorry that the people in charge aren’t responsive or respectful of your property. Because it’s a hardwire system, it is still monitoring battery voltage, and if low, it chirps. The solution is to replace all of the batteries in a building at one shot, using high quality alkaline replacement cells-preferably during summer break. But I’m not in charge of your maintenance scheduling.
Why is it necessary? Because people die without them.
These are 2001 numbers, and don’t reflect data from the Seton Hall University fire in South Orange, New Jersey, which killed three students in 2003.
One final thought-the NFPA recommends replacing smoke detectors if they are 10 years old, owing to sensitivity drift. Detectors can become insensitive to smoke, or overly-sensitive. I recommend writing the date of installation inside the cover or on the back side of the detector with a Sharpie-then you’ll know when to toss it. The other option is to purchase detectors with ultra long life lithium cells-they are meant to last 10 years and then be replaced.
[/QUOTE]
Oh, I’m certainly not arguing that smoke detectors are pointless. When I was about six months old we had a minor house fire - the drier in the basement decided that bursting into flames was the best way to dry our clothes, and had we not had a smoke detector in the basement as well, it could’ve been bad.
But I think that in my particular situation in a dorm (which also has smoke detectors in the hallway), the backup battery is a needless bit of annoyance. For it to actually be remotely useful a staggering number of highly unlikely things would have to all happen at once (someone’s out of their room but left a candle burning, which magically tips over, onto a flammable surface, and doesn’t go out but catches that surface alight. And all of this is happening while the power is out.) I’m fairly certain that that’s not going to happen.
I feel the OP’s pain. The last house I lived in had the smoke detector right near the kitchen. It went off so regularly as I prepared dinner that I called it the “cooking detector”. Fuck, I am getting wild just thinking about that fucking thing.
Argh, having set my smoke detector off three times last week I must say I agree. It’s particularly bad when you have a hangover …
But I’m better off, my smoke detector has a mute button (can’t find mine but this is the same idea). You hit the button and it shuts up for ten minutes. So I still get the initial ear splitting siren but at least I can stop it without having to wave a towel around to clear the smoke.
I might try vacuuming it and see if it helps tho, it’s got a lot more twitchy lately.
[QUOTE=don’t ask]
I happened to find myself drinking with 2 chefs recently and during the course of the evening they gave some cooking tips:
Chicken breasts are crappy and dry usually (your cordon bleu will be exempted due to the ham and cheese to keep them moist) so they should always be marinated. If you don’t have a sauce that they are being cooked in chuck them in lightly salted water and they comne out more succulent.
Always flatten them a little so that the breast is of roughly even thickness but no need to pound them out like schnitzels.
Whenever you double something over beware that you are creating something twice the thickness. This is the reason you mash down the edges of pastry - not to seal it but to make the joined edges the same thickness as the rest so it cooks.
[/QUOTE]
Good tips, but most chicken breasts in your supermarket are already “marinated” in lightly salted water. It’ll say on the package something like “Contains up to 15% natural chicken broth” or “Contains up to 15% of a flavor enhancers.” This plumps them up and adds weight. They won’t absorb any more water at home, so marinating them in salt water is just a time waster. This may not be true for truly fresh, never frozen chicken, but even there I’m seeing it more and more often.
You need to flatten out the breasts more than just evening them if you’re making cordon bleu or kiev, because you need the chicken to be flexible and large enough to wrap around your innards.
[QUOTE=asterion]
So fuck you, smoke detector. I’m about ready to get in there and yank out your battery and sell the Am-241 to the Iranians.
[/QUOTE]
I’m going to use this on the Smoke Detector from Hell that resides in my living room, next time it goes off to let us know that we are cooking something in the kitchen. The worst part is, it seems to be wired into our ceiling, so no battery for us to rip out :mad: No mute button, either :mad: :mad:
A secret my tenant’s wife taught me…
If you are going to cook something that creates a lot of smoke (broiling does it in my house), cover the smoke detector with a shower cap.
The elastic keeps it tight over the sensor, it’s easy to remove, and you don’t scare hell out of your wife, kids, and pets when the damn thing goes off.
Eli
Aah, a pitting I can relate to!
We too have one of these pesky uber-sensitive alarums, or, as we call it, the “Everything Is Okay” alarum. It goes off when we bake pizza or pies, when we make bruschetta, when we turn a burner on more than med-high, or when we use the toaster. There is no mute button and the bloody thing is fused to the wall, so removing it is out of the question. The only solution is to chuck the kitty cat in the bedroom so he can’t escape, open every door and window, and stand in front of it waving a towel or some other improvised fan-device. :rolleyes:
We complained to the landlady and were told that, because they were new, they were just sensitive and there was nothing she could do as she was required by the property owners to have these particular brands installed.
Oh, and ours? Speaks. In a very gentle, feminine voice that completely contrasts with the WHOOP! BEEP! SCREECH! it makes at the same time. “Fire. Fire. Carbon monoxide.”, it says.
[QUOTE=asterion]
Fairly basic recipe. Pound the chicken breasts as flat as possible (I keep seeing recipes that call for getting them down to 0.25" but I can never do that–personally, I blame the fact that the only thing I have that kinda works is a claw hammer, which doesn’t have a large area to work with) inside a sheet of plastic wrap. Add a slice of Swiss cheese, a slice of ham, fold the breast over to seal it as best as possible. Dredge it through flour, wet it with egg, and coat it in bread crumbs with Italian seasoning. Fry it in hot oil until both sides are nice and brown, then bake it in a 400 or 425 degree oven for 20-30 minutes. I use a borosilicate baking dish that I spray with a nonstick cooking spray (instead of using vegeatable shortening.)
[/QUOTE]
Handy tip: You’re probably gonna wanna take the plastic wrap out at some point before cooking the chicken.
My smoke alarms don’t go off when I cook, thank goodness, but I had to get rid of the carbon monoxide alarm, which went off at 200 decibels every time I sprayed some freakin’ air freshener, and could only be shut off by unplugging it and *then * beating it against the damned wall to dislodge the batteries.
[QUOTE=Q.E.D.]
If the detector is mounted on the kitchen ceiling, move it to an area outside the kitchen near a doorway leading to it.
[/QUOTE]
Huh, I actually had to do this earlier today. Kept on going off in the kitchen until one of my roommates just tore it down and pulled the battery out… Out to the living room it goes (10 feet from the kitchen door).
[QUOTE=NinjaChick]
But I think that in my particular situation in a dorm (which also has smoke detectors in the hallway), the backup battery is a needless bit of annoyance. For it to actually be remotely useful a staggering number of highly unlikely things would have to all happen at once (someone’s out of their room but left a candle burning, which magically tips over, onto a flammable surface, and doesn’t go out but catches that surface alight. And all of this is happening while the power is out.) I’m fairly certain that that’s not going to happen.
[/QUOTE]
Wait a minute…think logically here. When is it MORE likely that there will be lots of candles lit and left burning during times of darkness where people might bump into them without noticing because they’re distracted? A blackout seems like the only time that’s a very likely scenario, no? 
I’m quite convinced that my building does not have smoke alarms. I’m not sure whether it’s the people in 1.1 or 1.2 (I’m in 1.3) but every single afternoon I come home to a pea-soup hallway. The first time I saw it I was kind of worried but it’s been like that for months, so I guess we’re not going to die from it.
[QUOTE=don’t ask]
Chicken breasts are crappy and dry usually (your cordon bleu will be exempted due to the ham and cheese to keep them moist) so they should always be marinated. If you don’t have a sauce that they are being cooked in chuck them in lightly salted water and they comne out more succulent.
[/QUOTE]
Nah, all you have to do is batter one egg in a plate, put your fine breadcrumbs in another, salt the breasts, egg breast, bread breast, fry breast, put all breasts in a platter about half an hour before you actually start to eat. The oil will leak out and be its own sauce.
What, at home we’re into lazy cooking.
Oh, and what I’m going to say is probably heresy to you guys, but the only times I’ve heard/seen people pounding on chicken breasts has been Americans. In Spain if you want it thin, you get it sliced in half.
Be careful when moving or ‘ripping down’ a smoke detector. In newer homes (and apartments) they are wired with 110 volts and can hurt you if you’re not careful.
[QUOTE=Nava]
What, at home we’re into lazy cooking.
Oh, and what I’m going to say is probably heresy to you guys, but the only times I’ve heard/seen people pounding on chicken breasts has been Americans. In Spain if you want it thin, you get it sliced in half.
[/QUOTE]
I’m going to refer to my lazy cooking style as “authentic Spanish” from now on… 