Seriously. What the hell is all this whining in the thread?
But it’s rarely a case of the woman asking the man to go on a shopping trip. It’s more like we have lunch in a mall and then “Can we stop in here for just a minute?”
I really and truly find myself thanking the universe almost every single day for my boyfriend. This is my reminder to be thankful today.
“Universe, thank you for making him an adult, instead a whiny toddler.”
Why do you need men to go shopping with you? I can’t stand shopping with my SO. I love him to death but he’s a bad shopper. We just have different shopping styles. I vastly prefer to go alone. I don’t like shopping with anybody. I hate browsing - I go to buy.
But yes, sizes really do vary a lot. Men have absolutely no idea. A size 12 pants in one brand is like a size 8 in another. That XL shirt has spandex in it so it might be XL but it clings to you and shows off every unattractive lump. Etc.
Miss Elizabeth, thank his mother? I am always grateful to my SO’s mom for raising him up right. She didn’t do such a job with the first one, and I’m glad I grabbed the second son. 
I repeat, be an adult. If the stop puts some sort of onus on you, communicate that to your partner, otherwise learn how to amuse yourself for 10 minutes, or do some shopping on your own. You need socks. Men always need socks.
Then the women have to do the same. Don’t pout, don’t bitch and don’t hold a grudge for the next 15 years.
The next time I see a non-fictional woman dragging a petulant man-child around the mall, I’ll be sure to tell them so.
This. I would NEVER ask MrTao to go shopping with me, 'cause for me it’s both hunting AND gathering and I really don’t want to have to worry about someone else tagging along, ANYone else. 'cause I may say ‘fuck it’ after an hour and just go home with nothing: now I’ve either wasted the guy’s time <which was wasted anyway even if I did get something> or I’ve got a girl friend who insists on shopping until we find something. Ugh.
MrTao has asked me to go with him shopping, and I do. He’s got to go to Big and Tall shops, and I know that many times it’s a matter of just having to get whatever they have, rather than what he really wants, so my opinion seems to help. And I’ve found a couple of things for him that he wouldn’t have looked twice at that ended up being quite nice on him.
But otherwise, ugh. Fuggedabout it. If we both have to go to the mall to shop, I head one way and tell him to meet me at the food court in an hour, or whatever.
Why would this situation even come up? If you’re going random drifty shopping, why would you go with someone (male or female) who doesn’t enjoy that? And if you hate that kind of shopping, why would you go with someone who’s planning on doing it?
My husband shops like this: ‘I want a red T-shirt. That is a red T-shirt. It’s my size. Pay and go.’ If I’m with him, I can sometimes get him to try on the thing before he buys it, but that’s about the limit.
I mostly do not shop like that. Silenus described it perfectly.
We go shopping together if we’re buying something that needs both our opinions, like a new mattress. We compromise: he accepts that we’re not going to buy the first one we see, and I accept that we’re not going to go to every shop in town.
For individual stuff, I’ll go with him if he wants my opinion on something. If I’ve narrowed down something to two choices and I want his opinion on those, he’ll come with me. If I’m just going to drift around trying on a dozen winter coats, why on earth would either of us want him to go too? I’m going to feel rushed and hassled, he’s going to be bored and frustrated, nobody’s going to end up happy.
If we’re out already and I suddenly get the urge to look at something, then either I keep it to ONE thing, no exceptions, or else he goes to the pub/café/whatever and I meet him there when I’m done.
Seriously, I don’t get why we need ways of fixing a problem that doesn’t even need to exist.
Where are you shopping? Usually if I call ahead to a place and ask about a specific product, they will fall all over themselves to ask if they can hold it for me to pick up, even cheap, sale, or special items.
Guilty. Left to my own devices, I only ever buy utilitarian, solid, primary color clothes. I still don’t know the “rules of fashion” or why I can’t wear this belt and that tie together. If anybody who cares will offer their advice, I will gladly abuse that offer.
There are only two times my husband goes shopping with me:
- He needs shoes (I can’t just pick him up the right size in those)
- We are shopping for gifts for his family (he is incapable of doing this himself apparently)
Other than that, I shop alone or with my best friend (who is the only other human who can keep up, dammit!)
We used to go shopping together more before we had kids but even then it was mission-based. I go, find and buy. No puttering around the stores and browsing.
I’m just gonna leave this right here: Graph of man and woman shopping.
Why is that our job?
I hate shopping too, but the groceries/TP/haircut/clothes ain’t gonna buy themselves. Suck it up and deal.
(I especially hate clothes shopping, because I go knowing exactly what I’m looking for, and I can never find it. I schlepp all the way to the store and then waste hours trying to accomplish something that should take maybe 20 minutes. WTF.)
Heh, no kidding. I hate all shopping, but for some reason, Mr. Athena thinks I looooove to go to Target. “You go there once a week! You always spend at least $100! I don’t get it!” as if I’m having a fookin’ BLAST buying toilet paper and laundry detergent and picking up prescriptions. I really don’t mind doing it, but I wouldn’t say I like it - it just has to be done, and I hate having no toilet paper in the house more than I hate going to Target.
We may be married to the same man. My husband almost took an iron to the face after telling me that the money he spends on shiny new electronics toys is his fun money, and how I spend way more fun money on cat litter, socks, and rubbermaid storage containers.
Every time I see this thread title, I think, “Is this a message board from 1890?” I admit that I’m not married or anything, but can’t women go shopping without their man, if he doesn’t like to go? You wouldn’t see me sitting there bored in a blind while my SO went hunting, would you?
Hey, if cat litter is fun, you certainly shouldn’t be hogging it. Let him spend his fun money on cat litter. It’s only fair.
My SO actually does go to the grocery store / household items store with me most of the time, because when buying for two, it’s easier if two people carry it all between them. (There’s a rather noticeable difference in weight between a half gallon of milk – for one – and a full gallon for two. It’s even more noticeable when carrying it half a mile from the El station to home.) The only real downside is that my method is “get in, buy the stuff on the list, get out” and he gets distracted by the shinies. I spend a lot of the shopping trip telling him “no.” 
Shopping for beer on-line with beer in hand…They call me the Beer Hunter.
Note that I’m not pinning this on all “women” or “women in general”, this was specific to my situation but… my ex couldn’t drive, had no money to take the bus, and all the stores were a couple miles away (nevermind the lack of sidewalks where I live).
It wasn’t often, I’ll grant you, but the times we went were excruciating
She almost only shopped at Kohls, and is supremely picky about her clothes (they have to be absolutely plain, no frills, no weird tailoring, no multiple colors, PLAIN). She was also really tiny for an adult woman, she straddles the women’s small, junior, misses, and petite section depending on the specific piece in question. Every time she tried something on, it would take approximately 15 minutes for a single article of clothing, and I had to be at attention to comment on it.
Like I said, it wasn’t often, but whenever we went I was stuck at Kohls – for most of it by myself starting at a wall while my phone ran out of battery waiting for her to get out of the dressing room – for 3-4 hours.
This was a pattern with all non-grocery shopping with her too. I like going to Michael’s, Jo Ann’s Fabric, and other craft stores, I really do. So I never minded taking her to them when she brought it up. I quickly learned that I cannot spend 3.5 hours at such a store. She would never buy anything (no money), she just wanted to look, which is fine, but she wanted to go to Michaels almost weekly. And she wouldn’t even browse the whole store. Depending what hobby she was interested in that week she would literally spend 3 hours in just a single aisle (or maybe two). I can’t find things to look at in the whole STORE for 3 hours. It wouldn’t have been so bad if she was artistic or actually stuck with hobbies either, but she’s the kind of person who gets uber excited about a hobby or project and then drops it the second after they try it. The few times I bought her yarn and crochet needles, or whatever, as a gift it would be abandoned by the next week, guaranteed.
Like I said, I’m in no way generalizing this to “ladies” or “most women” or even “a significant percentage of women”. It was just her. But she would essentially make me go with her and it was pretty painful.
I would think that in those situations in which the man has to accompany the woman (transportation issues, etc.), the existence of all the wonderful new technological devices would make the experience much more enjoyable for men.
Years ago, I bought my father a handheld solitaire device to use when he had to accompany my mother and me on a shopping trip. He got a lot of use out of it (he was solitaire-obsessed).
I would think that with a Kindle, iPad, or handheld gaming device, depending on his preference, along with a place to sit, a man should be able to endure a shopping trip with a minimum of discomfort.