how do servers communicate to each other

If I wanted to set up a server or become a ISP (hypothetically), what do I plug my ISP into? Is there a physical network (e.g. cable) around the country? Presumably there must be super-nodes that the individually owned servers or ISPs plug into or does a big ISP might have its own network? Who connects the nodes and who owns them or the cables? What do the nodes plug into?
Do the “supernodes” if they exist worry about spam or illegal content, or do they just pass on the messages and leave that to the individual ISPs?

Actually alot of above questions may not make sense depending on the actual situation, but I think you get my general drift. I guess I am looking for the architecture of the internet.

There are several companies who run “backbones”, which are simply very high bandwidth connections. These backbones connect to other networks and to one another at network access points (NAPs).

So if you want to be an ISP, you make a deal with someone to provide you with a certain amount of bandwidth. That provider might be a backbone company or they might be an intermediate. Your traffic goes upstream through your provider(s) and eventually reaches a NAP where it can tie into the network of other providers.

This link has a nice picture, and this one lists some of the big providers and who connects to who at the various NAPs.

thanks for the good links - it answers my questions. I notice that for only around £5000/year I can have a 100MB/s connection to an exchange point. Cool - think of all those movies downloaded in seconds. All I need is a now is a 50 km ethernet cable.