My Maternal grandma is living out her final years with my parents here in Vegas. She’ll be 89 on Thursday and dammit, she won’t die!
Just kidding. My mom has a very hard time with her and trying to run a pizza place at the same time. Grandma can be mean sometimes. The dr’s at her last visit say she can live another 10 years or so. :eek: SO I hope I die before I can be angry for still being alive. I want to die with my husband- he’s 5 years older than I but in way way better shape than me. So - hopefully I can live to be oh, maybe about 77?
I’m tempted to go with Heinlein’s “stepped on by an elephant while making love”. Although with my current track record, both of those seem equally improbable, and it seems sort of hard on the lady involved. So I guess I’d have to go with meteor strike — pretty quick and not a lot of mess left for people to have to clean up.
I do not know, but I know what I want my funeral to be like. I want everyone to come and dance their asses off while I am on strings up front with someone controlling me. That would be super funny! Then, they would fly me over the ocean, and then throw my body in. Or shot out of a cannon into the ocean. Or if I have a company by then, some how perserve/stuff my head so that they can place it in the lobby and really scare people!
My grandmother’s death was nice, as deaths go … she had a mild heart attack, was hospitalized, the whole family came to the hospital; she was expected to recover fully. The next day, surrounded by family, she was sitting up in bed, eating lunch, laughing and chatting, and suddenly dropped dead. (A second heart attack.)
I want to die in some selfless act of heroism, but I realize how unlikely that is.
I want to wake up dead. Also not meant as a smartass reply.
My funeral? Whatever makes the people I leave behind feel better; although I have told my only daughter that if she lets people “view” me without my lipstick and my earrings I will come back to haunt her.
Tell ya what, neuroman…If I manage to get ahold of a weapon of unimaginable destructive power by the time we’re both on our last legs, I’ll give you a call. We can draw lots as to what patch of real estate we want to turn into a glass-paved self-lighting parking lot.
Failing that…something that would leave my corpse very well preserved. So that my body (or at least, my head) could be discovered by scientists, and given a place of honor in a museum somewhere, perhaps hundreds or thousands of years in the future.
Eternity in a glass case. Yeah, I think I could live with that. Hopefully without having anything accidentally torn off by a ski-pole, though.
I’ve thought about this a bit. I’d like to be put under, as though I were going to be operated on, then beheaded in the quickest, neatest way possible. I figure it’s the best combination of a speedy and painless death.
As for burial, I’d hate to be rotting somewhere forever, so I guess cremation is the way to go. If a loved one has come into some money at that point, I wouldn’t mind getting turned into a diamond. If not, I’m open to people taking a few bones or teeth as a keepsake. If they want to make something nice out of my skin, that would be ok, but no lampshades.
Holding borrowed and/or all my non-borrowed cash, I want to be able to walk into a clinic or a hospital at any time, fill up and sign a few forms and pay them all the cash, to get a total anesthetic and be injected with a lethal dose while I am under anesthetic.
Unfortunately, John Asscraft does not allow me to do that. So, I suppose I have to fight to death, while I’m alive, to get rid of all the “ethics and moral” lawyers and all the God-loving / Religious people who are limiting my freedom to die the way I want.
My son wants the end to come whilst standing in the midst of Stonehenge. He wants several of the stones to suddenly and inexplicably fall over on him. Alternatively, he wants an Easter Island head to eat him, leaving only his boots behind. I have a weird kid.
In a world gone mad, only one man stands before the madness.
He is BytopianDream!
After already having his 50 kids and grandkids, visiting the entire world and riding every rollercoaster in the world, he had one chance left to save the human race.
One chance to protect his family.
And one last chance to do that hot-blue-skinned-space-alien-chick.
He would give up his life, destroying the KzX’ylp’wqs’'tryx Mothership and saving them all.
This summer, only one man can save us, one man against an entire evil alien race of doom, one man for action, one man for love.
“Hey, pandahead, eat this!” BLAM!
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