We’re building a house and are unsure what to tell the plumber. We’re of average height — me 5’ 10", wife 5’ 6", son is 3’ 3" at 3 years. The toilets in our current house are 16" (floor to top of seat), but feel kinda low.
16" is a standard toilet. 19" would be a “chair height” toilet (aka ADA compliant aka “comfort height” aka “right height”). You might be happier with that if the standard seems too short for you.
Maybe put in a chair height in the master suite and a standard height in whatever bathroom your son will mostly use?
Is there even a standard “standard” height?
You can find more charts with different limits, too, without breaking a sweat.
There are also toilets with shelves in the bowl, squat toilets (no seat), “multifunction” toilets, bidets, etc. so you have a lot of options to consider 
I have known people to have trouble standing up from “builder’s standard” if they have any hip or back problems. We replaced all the low toilets in our house with these: https://www.homedepot.com/p/Glacier-Bay-McClure-12-inch-Rough-In-One-Piece-1-1-GPF-1-6-GPF-Dual-Flush-Elongated-Toilet-in-White-Seat-Included-N2420/317676800, which are also push-button rather than lever flush.
I am 6’ 2", my wife is 5’ 10" and both 77 years old. When we moved in to our new house last year we installed new toilets that are 17" tall, not counting the seats. (another 1").
They work for us. Anything smaller is the equivalent of a ‘squatty potty’ to our minds.
Wife also has two artificial knees and an artificial hip joint. She had more trouble with the ‘builders standard’ toilets than I did, but I also had trouble getting up and down.
Get whatever works for you.
I know that replacement seats are available that raise the seated position by a couple of inches or more, so if you have a standard toilet but want to sit higher, it’s possible without replacing the entire thing.
AKA the Dutch “study your dump” shelf.
Long enough to reach the ground.
People point out the advantages of higher toilet seats. Why aren’t they all higher? What’s the advantage of the “standard” size?
Not necessarily:
I daresay you want your feet to reach the ground, though.
High enough to reach the floor with your feet.
Get a higher toilet (we did the wall-mount Totos, but they are pricy) and get a Washlet!!!
If you build a higher toilet you can always put something in the floor to raise your feet to your comfort level. If the toilet is too low, there is nothing you can do. If I am offered two options I choose the one that gives me more possibilities in the future.
We made our toilets 18.5" high, it is perfect for me (6’4"). My wife is shorter, but she likes that too and does not use anything to raise her feet.
All this, of course, is the quintessential YMMV stuff.
It is not only a Dutch thing: they are (or used to be) frequent in Germany too.
Just checked–our wall-mounts are 17.5" to the rim, 18.5 to the seat. I’m 6’2" and my wife is 5’0" and they’re perfect. I had a serious knee injury last fall and could have used a standing toilet.
The standard height is supposed to be a better angle for pooping. Hence squatty potties.
I understand why people of average height or taller would prefer taller toilets. But I’m currently 5"1. No one taller than me uses my toilet unless I have guests over. My standard-height toilet is exactly the perfect height for me. If I had a taller one, I’d need a squatty-potty footstool to be comfortable, based on my experience.
Being of similar height as your wife, I’m amazed.
Those appear to be the heights to the rim of the bowl. OP described theirs to the top of the seat, so the measurements I gave were to the top of the seat (sorry if that wasn’t clear), which would not be incompatible with your chart.
How else are you going to be able to tell your doctor if you have black or tarry stools, or blood in your stool. We don’t have that kind of toilet, and about 90% of the time my poo just disappears down the pipe; for the other 10% some of it floats. Not enough for a definitive answer to the doctor. This has been the case ever since we got low-flow toilets.
I kind of like toilets in commercial spaces (stores, hotels, offices) that still seem to have large bowls that hold a lot of water and most of your poo. I assume they have other ways of conserving water, as with a jet flush.
“How high?”. My answer is: “Several inches higher than they are already, no matter the height”.
Our toilet is okay, height-wise, but I wouldn’t mind if it were 3-4 inches higher. I spent a week at a friend’s house, where the guest bathroom’s toilet was lower to the ground (the previous owners had young kids, which may be why) and standing up from that was more of a challenge than I liked. As I age, even a taller standard toilet will become more of an issue. I will efinitely be measuring things , if we ever redo the bathroom and need to get a new toilet.
In my MIL’s bathroom, the family installed an elevated toilet seat on top of the regular toilet - added 8 inches or so to the height, and also included grab bars. I liked the height (but found the grab bars barely fit my hips; MIL must also have had trouble).
If leg/hip angle is a concern, get a squatty potty or just a regular cheap footstool.
I guess I’m the only one here who hates “comfort height”. We replaced our toilet a few years ago, and it’s too high for me to sit with both feet flat on the ground. My legs kind of dangle, which hurts my thighs.
I do have a “squatty potty”, which makes it tolerable, but not comfortable. Because it’s too small for my entire foot to be flat on top of it. And it’s actually too high. I just need one inch.