How many handshakes are you from famous people?

My uncle is a secret service agent on vice presidential duty, so I am two handshakes from Al Gore, three from George W. Bush and president Clinton, and four from Jeb Bush and numerous world leaders. But I also know a man that used to work for Saddam Hussein so I am two handshakes from him!
I love my connections. I should get elected to a public office in no time.
How many handshakes are you from famous people?

Well, of course this has been done before, but I frankly don’t care, so…

I’ve shook hands with Patrick Duffy (of Dallas fame) and Kevin Pollack (of Usual Suspects and A Few Good Men, among many others).

There is someone around here who meets famous people like it’s their job, but I don’t recall who…

I am simultaneously and independently two, three, four and five handshakes away from Bill Gates.

Course living in Seattle helps…

I am 0 handshakes from Al Gore, that is, I’ve shaken hands with him. It was while he was a Senator, though.

I’ve dated a Shuttle astronaut (long before she became one), and was a dorm-mate of Superman (Chris Reeves) in college.

I have a friend who worked at ILM for a long time, so I’m 2 (or is it 1) handshakes from George Lucas and one more from whoever he knows.

Slithy Tove’s aunt shook hands with Nixon, who shook hands with Khrushchev, who bottomed for Stalin, who topped for Khrushchev, who met Shirley Maclaine on the set of Can-Can, who introduced Caherine Bach of Dukes of Hazzard fame to New Age spiritualism, who was friends in her struggling actress days with Slithy Tove’s big brother, who used to have swordfights with his and Slithy Tove’s piss streams when they were kids.

I’ve met the members of the band Enemymine, as well as Poe and her brother, who is an author. I’m one handshake away from the members of Low (should go down to 0 soon), and M. Doughty of Soul Coughing.
By another route, I’m one handshake away from an author who appears on Oprah every now and then, and of course, Oprah.

Lemme see, I got to party with Moxy Fruvous, Valdi, Blue Rodeo, and the Shuffle Demons, I got to shake hands with Chris Spedding, sing at 3:00 am with the Skydiggers - gawd I love small-town music festivals. :smiley:

Eric Nielson, ex-deputy prime minister of Canada, sponsored my parents when they immigrated to Canada.

According to family apocrypha, :rolleyes: my uncle Jerry brought Charles Manson home when he was still running with the Challengers motorcyle club. Dunno if I buy that, though. Not like I’d remember, being a mere budling of two or three at the time.

Pigpen McKern’s (sp? Grateful Dead drummer) cousin Bob came to visit my folks in 1972 or so - they ended up teaching Transcedental Meditation in Mayo, YT for a couple weeks. Boy, that was strange.

I’ve seen Leslie Nielson around a few times, but never had the opportunity to actually meet him.

That’s all I can remember at the moment, anyways.


My best friend’s ex-boyfriend auditioned to be a Janet Jackson dancer and briefly dated her choreographer, so I am four handshakes from Miss Janet.

My mom’s ex-coworker was tight with JC’s mom (from *NSYNC). So I’m four handshakes from JC and five from the rest of the *NSYNCers, not to mention Miss Britney Spears (I have a sudden urge to wash my hand!).

I shook Bill Clinton’s hand during a volunteerism summit a few years back, so I’m just a few shakes away from some really cool world leaders.

My best friend Gladys met Keanu Reeves, so I’m one shake from him, and I sold Tim Robbins a pair of Old Navy Khaki Walking Shorts, so I’m in like Flynn with Susann Surandon, Morgan Freedman, Kevin Costner, and assorted other Hollywood heavyweights.

Finally, I shook Will Smith’s hand, which leads me to a whole lotta Hollywood.

I’ve met a few kinda (barely) famous people in the past. I talked to Cevin Key of Skinny Puppy once; he didn’t want to talk to me, but his girlfriend seemed to find me interesting. I tried to date Roxanne Heichert of Go Four 3 (she was such a bundle of energy), but I was usually drunk when I talked to her, and I’m really not charming when I’m drunk.

But let me tell you a story. It’s not a great story, but I’m bored and I like talking about myself.

Back in my college days, I lived in a run-down, roach-infested apartment building for a while. Lots of interesting people lived there, though, lots of spiked hair, piercings (long before they went mainstream), leather, and black makeup, people who had glass-smashing parties (drinking glasses, wine glasses, that kind of thing)… Jim “I, Braineater” Cummings lived upstairs; I don’t know how famous he is outside Vancouver (or for that matter, in Vancouver), but he is some kind of celebrity.

My neighbour was an extremely cynical gay man who made custom boxer shorts for a living (at least, I think that was his living). I can be pretty cynical, but this guy made me look like Mary Poppins. He’s nobody famous, but let me tell you about him.

His bedroom and mine shared a wall. My bed was a leaky air mattress on the roach-infested floor, which I had to blow up a little every night. My neighbour must have heard my nightly heavy breathing, I imagine, otherwise I don’t know why – at a small party my roommate had – he told everyone, out of nowhere, with a straight face, that he heard me masturbating every night. I laughed. He was clearly trying to embarrass me, but I’m a pretty easy-going guy, so mostly he just mortified my roommate and his guests.

Like I said, this guy made boxer shorts, and one evening, when my roommate was out, he asked me to model some of his new creations so he could see how they looked. I agreed, thinking he was going to be professional about it. Silly me. Well, one thing started leading to another, until I put a stop to it, and when he asked, I told him I was very straight. But, even I’m not sure what might have happened had he been an attractive man, which he most definitely was not. I don’t want to be mean or rude or insensitive, but I found him physically repugnant, never mind his dark personality.

Anyways, I’m trying to explain why I have doubts about what happened next, and why I may have missed out on a handshake with someone famous. You see, the evening I modeled his boxer shorts for him, my neighbour mentioned a famous movie star friend of his was coming to town and would be dropping by for a visit. I forgot all about this after the trauma of the evening (I was shaking afterwards, I was so upset), but even as he was telling me this I had my doubts. It would be perfectly in character for him to make a joke at my expense, even if I never got it.

Then one day, a couple of weeks later, the doors of my apartment building’s little, mouldy elevator opened, roaches scattered, and there stood my neighbour, his latest boy toy, and… well… there was this huge guy, looking totally out his element, and bearing an uncanny resemblance to Jeffrey Jones. I looked at him as I got on the elevator, he didn’t look at me, I said “hi” to my neighbour, who kinda seemed to want to make an introduction, but we all rode up to our floor without saying a word. I sure wasn’t going to say anything, 'cause if this was a joke, there was no way I was falling for it. And to this day, I don’t know if it was a joke or not, and yet… I suspect I know what kind of boxer shorts Jeffrey Jones wears.

I shook hands with Bill Clinton on a campaign stop in '96, which means I’m four handshakes away from The Great Zamboni.

Wait, doesn’t this mean people you could call up and (theoretically) be in touch with Famous Person X? I mean, versus chance meetings that won’t happen again?

Anyway, I was a handshake away from JFK Jr, but then he up and died. Daryl Hannah I’m still one shake from. Those are the most interesting ones. The others get more tenuous and a lot less notable.

I’ve shaken hands with John Ralston Saul, Svend Robinson, Naomi Klein, Maude Barlow, Alexa McDonough, and Gary Doer - all leading lights of the Canadian left.

My dad, who’s a journalist, has shaken hands with a lot more people than I have.

Oh, and I’ve shaken hands with Tom Jackson, which puts me one degree away from the entire cast of Star Trek: The Next Generation.

I keep in contact with the little brothers of the guys in Incubus. They have their own band. So I’m zero handshakes away from the younger brothers, and 1 or 2 handshakes away from Incubus!

I’ve shaken hands with Bob Backlund(heh).

I hung out with Mo Vaughn(Oh yea

My girlfriend’s parents are the co-owners of Tiger Electonics. (I don’t know if that counts for anything)

My ex-friend met FenixTx - One or two shakes away from them. (Damn her!!)

Zero handshakes away from Mercury astronaut Scott Carpenter. (Met him when I was in college.)

Zero handshakes away from mountain climber Jim Whittaker. (Met him at the grand opening of the Berkeley REI store.)

One handshake away from Bill Gates. (Through working for the Seattle Symphony. To arrange a big software donation, I got to schmooze with a guy who’d been at Microsoft since it was about two dozen employees in one hallway.)

One handshake away from Frank Zappa. (The Seattle Symphony’s assistant conductor once worked for Zappa.)

Maybe one handshake from Charles Manson. I don’t know if she actually shook hands with him, but a college friend used to visit Chuckles in prison, to try preaching the gospel to him.

Through my sister (a photographer), I’m one handshake away from:
Terry Bradshaw
Martin Sheen
(and other cast members of The West Wing)
Gerald & Betty Ford
Bob Hope
Jerry Lewis
William Wyler
Gene Autry
Rock Hudson
Tommy Lasorda

And because of my sister’s work with the Fords:
Two handshakes from Nixon, Agnew, Reagan, Carter…

Also because of my sis, I think I’m three handshakes from Reverend Jim Jones. Yep, that one. She knew four or five people who died in Jonestown.

Since I have also shaken hands with Alexa McDonough (NDP leadership debate–how I ended up there is a long story), I am one handshake away from matt_mcl. I am also one handshake away from Nelson Mandela (through the principal of my college) and Seamus Heaney (through my wife’s supervisor). Hurry up and get that Nobel Prize already, Matt.

Oh, yeah, I’m zero handshakes away from William Gibson.

I am zero shakes from Rev. Jesse Jackson, hold on, must go wash hands again…

I am one shake from Robert Heinlein.

I am one shake from George Lucas x2, due to an ILM intern who I work with and my mom’s boyfriend, who met him at a Cinema Convention (he’s the one with the signed Ep. I poster, the lucky bastard).

I am zero shakes from the lead singer to Tesla (he was DJing at a strip club here in Sac. for a while).

My father in law once drove a limo for Ozzy Osbourne so that puts me one away.
I’m sure that there’s more, but I don’t care to dredge.

I’ve got to shake hands with Gen Colin Powell

One. I’ve met Pat Buchanan. Which, considering how much of a liberal I am, is REALLY weird.