That’s pretty much all I have to ask. Do you like him to make suggestions, tell you what highlights he thinks might work for your skin tone, and the like? Do ask for advice? Do you prefer to walk in, say “Take two inches off,” then have him take the two inches off, and be done with it?
Need answer fast!
I love going to the lady who cuts my hair. I let her do whatever she thinks looks good, but mind you she has about the same taste in hairstyles that I do. She also colors it for me and I asked her from the start to use whatever product & color that she thought looked best.
I’m always open to her suggestions.
ETA: If I went to somebody new I probably wouldn’t let them exercise that much control. I’ve had too many bad experiences.
If I’m getting my hair cut short, I generally just tell the person cutting it what I want. Lately I’ve been trying to maintain it somewhat longer, so I pretty much leave it up to the stylist, which is probably somewhat annoying for them when they finish cutting and I ask if they can take a little more off the back.
Advice is good. With the stylist I have now, we just talk about what I’d like and I trust her to cut it since I’ve been going to her for so long.
If I bring in a picture of what I want, I’d like to know that it probably won’t work with my hair type/color BEFORE she attempts it!
About the only advice I get anymore is about the length of my sideburns, and I just tell them to do what they think is right.
I would never return to a barber/stylist that refused to give input. They tend to have a CYA attitude, meaning that they are more interested in avoiding liability than in making me look good.
No change. I get the same hair style always–it’s kind of hard to deal with when it’s super short or “edgy” looking, so I definitely like that my stylist can just repeat the same thing over and over and has no problems with that.
I have no idea what looks good with my hair - I rely on stylists.
My general contention is the first option. I tell you what to do with my hair, you do it, then I give you money. Of course, there are times when I am open to suggestion, in which case I will ask. In fact, my current do (which I’ve had for about a year now) was a suggestion from the guy who used to cut my hair. It was a hot day, and I was damn sick and tired of all that hair on my head, but didn’t think I would look good with short hair. I asked him what his suggestions were, and he ended up giving a cut that was short, but not boyish looking, which is what I was afraid of. It’s an awesome do, so I stuck with it, and when I go back to the salon, I just ask that the ends be trimmed.
What I always hate is unsolicited advice. I know you’re a stylist and all, so style is probably your thing, but shut up about how nice you think my hair would look with some color. I don’t want color. I like my hair black, and if I were considering coloring it, I’d ask you. My old guy (who moved - grr!) just cut my damn hair, and would give his opinion if I asked for it.
So yeah, I need a new stylist. Not just because of the unsolicited advice (annoying, but whatever if you do my hair the way I like it), but because he tries to enforce his vision on me.
A few of my good friends are hair stylists and an ex-boyfriend was one too. I know (through them) how often clients come in with impossible requests. They have thin, wiry hair and bring in a picture of a woman with thick, smooth hair and want her cut while wanting to spend less than 20 minutes on their hair each day. Without advice these people are going to be sorely disappointed.
My stylist knows my hair, but before she did I welcomed any advice she had since she was the professional. Now she just lets me know new things I can do with it and I’m always up for that.
Having a stylist that ignores my ideas and does what they want? They’d never see me again. I’d much rather have them say something like “I’m sorry, that won’t work for your hair and I wouldn’t want to try it because you won’t be happy.”
I ask for help. I need help. Even after almost 46 years on this planet, I don’t know what looks good on me. I’ve had a couple of hairstyles I like, but they’re out of style by now. So I ask. What frustrates me is that they don’t like to help: I keep getting prodded for what I want. The only thing I ask is that it’s easy to style: I’m a wash-and-go kind of gal.
I voted “advice is great!”, but there is a delicate balance between stylists being too pushy and too push-over-y, I think.
For a couple of years, I went to a woman who, on the one hand, was great in explaining to me what lengths and kinds of layering work with my features…but on the other hand, barely acknowledged my requests and would give me the cut she thought would look best on me. I think I went to her six times, and I only liked one haircut she gave me. This was the second-to-last haircut I got from her; I went in the sixth time and told her I loved the haircut she had just given me six weeks ago and now I’d just like it trimmed for maintenance – she gave me a completely different cut, much shorter than I wanted. That was the last straw, and I never went back. But now, I’ve found that my current stylist listens too much to me and just does what I ask, without (at least out loud) considering whether that style is right for my face. I’d like a happy medium, please!
I feel for you. There is nothing like having that balance like Sleeps mentions - someone who does what you want but also keeps you informed of new things you can do. I had an excellent stylist (he was really good with curly hair) and got spoiled. He moved off, and I tried a frou-frou guy, but his style just wasn’t a match for me and I quit going there after he wanted to pluck my eyebrows. Thank goodness I found the lady I go to, now.
But yeah, you’re gonna have to find someone else.
They don’t. fucking. know. what to do with curly hair. I don’t want any input. I told you to make it even, shut up and make it even. No, I don’t need to cut it short because you think so. It’s very very thin so I can afford to have it long since it doesn’t weigh a lot. No, this isn’t the 80s. Stop making me have big hair. I know what I am doing. STOP FUCKING AROUND WITH IT!
I tend to go to the cheapest places possible, both for prices and because they just do what I say. I have never met a hair salonist who had any idea what to do with curly hair other than cut it short, actually.
Well yeah, I think you’re a crummy stylist and a human being if you don’t tell people you’re not capable of doing what they’re asking for. In those cases, it’s not so much unsolicited advice, as it is being good at your job.
Pretty much. Last time I was there he kept non-joking joking about me adding color. Shut up. I’ve told you three separate times that I am not interested in color. Also, when he “cut” my hair, I couldn’t even tell that a scissors had been anywhere near me at all. I had to tell him to cut more. He has this vision of long highlighted hair, meanwhile I have a vision of my hair remaining short and black.
Obviously, there’s a difference between the unsolicited advice about coloring, and not doing his job, which is to cut my damn hair, but they’re both annoying. I’ve only had one stylist in the past declare what style she thinks might be good on me, but sher got the hint when my response was, “Just a trim, thanks.” She wanted to make my hair big; I don’t do big. She was from the South, though, so I can forgive her for thinking big hair would be a good look.
The dilemma about finding a new stylist: I’m a black woman in Minnesota, which gives me exactly 5 people who I’ll let near my hair with chemicals and shears. My old guy moved to Atlanta. Pfft, where’s he going to find clients there?
Edit: Yes, Anaamika, yes. Preach it, non-straight-haired person! There are so many folks, and lords know they try, who can’t cut hair that isn’t straight to save their lives. I straighten my hair now, so at least that part makes things easier, but good gravy, there have been times…
I had this problem when I lived in a predominately whitebread area. I’ve learned since to go to someone who is experienced with ethnic hair.
To answer the OP, I like to tell my hairdresser the basics of what I want and how much time I want to spend on it, then ask for suggestions. Doesn’t mean that I’ll use all of the suggestions, though. 
I lucked out. My neice is a cosmetology instructor and used to do my hair, before scheduling conflicts got in the way. Now, I go to one of her former star students who has a booth in a shop in my town.
Same.
I know what I hate, and tell them to avoid that. But other than that, I’m the indecisive twit who sits in the chair asking “so, um, what do you think?” I think it drives the hair stylist nuts.
I’m paying them to take the blame for bad decisions. When my hair comes out looking awful (as it frequently did before I started going to the person I see now), at least I could say “she did it” rather than knowing I did it to myself.
Wow. I’m not even sure where to go with this.
Although I do need to say that the broad brush you just painted “they” who don’t know “what to do with curly hair” is rubbing me the wrong way. Maybe I’m just tired and pissy today, BUT - even still. There ARE stylists out there that actually DO have a clue, contrary to your experience. As someone with naturally curly hair myself, I have had my share of bad haircuts, which made it important for me to pay extra-super-close attention to the curly hair cutting section in hair school. Whenever someone walks into my salon with curly hair, I am usually the stylist that gets the client. So, yes, just so you know, there ARE some of us out there that DO know what. the. fuck. to. do. with. curly. hair. :rolleyes:
Honestly, if you just “want it even,” yes, go to a SuperCuts or Fantastic Sam’s or whatever quickie chop shop you choose to go to. But the whole “shut up and do what I say because I am paying you” attitude…? It sucks. No matter WHERE you go for your cut. We are trained to give OPINIONS on your current style/look and what we think would IMPROVE it. Don’t want it? OK, fine. No big deal. But don’t be an asshole about it. 95% of my clients, though, sit in my chair and say “what do YOU think?” Even after me having done their hair for years. They trust me to make an educated decision on what I think would look best on them. If you are NEW client, then that’s different - we are trying to assess what it is you want from us and the final outcome you desire. So we are going to ask a lot of questions about your hair and your daily routine. But again - the “shut up and cut attitude,” yeah - I can do without that, thanks.
Maybe all these stylists are giving you suggestions on your hair because they feel it is something that would suit you better, or they are trying to update your look from your current one. But this is just what I am getting from reading that reply.
And, um…“hair salonist?” :dubious:
I chose “Advice is great; I ask for it,” but from my stylist, I could have chosen the “I’ll take it unasked.”
Her hair is similar in texture to mine, and her face shape is similar, so if she tells me that my hair just won’t do that, or it would work better if we added some layers or whatever, she’s always right.
I need as much advice as I can get! But then, I’m hopeless with hair. :rolleyes:
I let my stylist do what she wants so long as it works in a professional setting (I can’t go into work with teal hair, no matter how fabulous it would look on me) and it’s easy to style on my own (because, as mentioned, I’m hopeless with hair).
I don’t think she actually meant there is no hair stylist on planet Earth who knows how to cut curly hair. Perhaps that was a bit of hyperbole, expressing how difficult it is to find someone who knows what they’re doing with curly hair. It is difficult.
I know there are some; I’ve found them. I’ve scoured the planet, but I’ve found them. You know what’s funny about what you say is it’s been about a good 10 years since I’ve been to a stylist who wasn’t black, and you wouldn’t believe how many black stylists can’t cut hair if it’s not straight! Really? How did they get their hair cut before they started relaxing and/or flat ironing it? Have they been straightening their hair their entire lives? It’s madness. I finally found my one, true, hair love in this town, and he moved.